Why do we put up with all of this?
As I'm reading through all the posts here, I can't help but think that we are all truly suffering here at the hands of our spouses and their children. Of couse, I know that there is the other side of it, too. There are definitely days where I am truly grateful to be part of this family and really enjoy it and feel like I'm benefitting from it in some way, and if you look at the millions of pictures I've taken over the years, you can see the true joy that I have shared with my family, but of course, there are no pictures of the sadness, lonliness, feelings of betrayal, or the countless times I've literally ran away with my stuff in a bag, knowing that if I left, I'd be homeless, but feeling that that might actually be better than this. And if you read through all these posts, you cannot not feel the true sorrow and pain that we all continue to experience.
So, is it worth it?
Do the good days make up for the bad ones?
Does your spouses conditional love make up for the pain he/she causes you?
Are we just afraid of being lonely? Do we not have anywhere else to turn?
Maybe we just have never-ending hope that this will somehow change, go away, or get better?
What is it?
So, is it worth it?
So, is it worth it?
--------> Definitely
Do the good days make up for the bad ones?
----------> Yes, by far
Does your spouses conditional love make up for the pain he/she causes you?
----------> I know that it is never BF's *intent* to hurt me, as I know when I hurt him, it's never my intent. BF is his own person, and I am my own person, with that, we have different views, different ways of handling things, and sometimes we both have a different perspective when looking at the same exact situation. Why is my view any better than his, and vice versa? I try to remember this when we go thru difficult times, and if we can both respect each others POV, but yet, reach a happy medium with one another...well to me, that's all that matters. There will be times in any and every relationship that you're hurt by the one's you love, and at some point, hurt the one's you love as well.
Are we just afraid of being lonely? Do we not have anywhere else to turn?
----------> You can be lonely even in a relationship. The question is, which provides more fruit, being with the person you love, or being without them?
Maybe we just have never-ending hope that this will somehow change, go away, or get better?
-----------> Change first comes within ourselves, if we aren't willing to do the work within ourselves first, how can we expect others to? With that said, if you are doing everything you can within yourself first, and the relationship is still not producing fruit, then IMO, it's the wrong relationship.
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"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”