If it doesn't say anything about taking children out of the state, you ought to be able to simply say you're going on vacation and tell her to use your cell phone if she needs to reach you.

I would say to only give her the dates and not the details. We struggled with a similar issue when trying to get the Sperm Clan to synch with our vacation schedule when they were planning their visitation time with my SS. If we gave them details of our summer plans they would invariably manipulate their CO'd summer visitation to interfere with our vacation plans.

Our CO stipulated that they had 5 weeks of visitation in the summer and had to provide us with 60day written notification that they intended to exercise their summer visitation. Our CO also allowed us to take a 10 day visitation with SS anytime after the first two weeks of their 5wk summer visitation following which the rest of their 5 weeks would finish. They never once allowed us to take our CO's 10 time midway through their 5wks in the summer. So we started stipulating when they could start their 5wks. This was not an official capability stipulated in the CO but we got tired of their manipulations so we started dictating when their 5wks could start. That pissed the Sperm Clan off but by that time we were past giving a shit what they thought. If we had vacation plans early in the summer we let them start their 5wks after our vacation was complete. IF we had plans late in the summer we let them start their visitation early in the summer.

For clarity, they also got ~1wk in the winter and all of Spring break (~1wk) and 10 days in the fall in our neck of the woods providing SS did not miss school. They never once took the fall visitation.

Since there is no passport requirement for your SILs wedding there is not much BM can do to stop you from taking the kids to the wedding. As with most things discretion is the better part of valor so I would suggest that you keep it all tight lipped so that BM can't bitch until you are back from the wedding. Then it won't matter what she has to say about it.

IMHO of course.

Our BM went on a cruise with her brood and SKs/5. She needed a signed notarized document that she could take them out of the country and promised to bring them back by x date. They didn't really need a passport for where they were going either; the notarized form was standard for the cruise line. (Sounds like they've dealt with this before...)

Maybe you could do something similar if you're that concerned. Otherwise I'll echo what's already been said: no passport needed, no need to worry. They are, after all, called the US Virgin Islands. It's not like you're taking them to Cuba.

The Virgin Islands sound like a wonderful idea! I hope you have fun!

Legally - no but realistically possibly. If you are worried about it, then i would let her know after the kids are with you - hey, we are going out of town - call my cell if you need anything.

count your blessings you dont need a passport.

we want to get one for SD13 and BM refuses to sign the papers. imagine denying your child the opportunity to see the world!

guess we'll take her in 5 years when she's 18 and we dont need parental sign off. hopefully fiance's extended family who live overseas live long enough to meet his daughter! (BM would never get on an airplane and refused to allow fiance to ever take his daughter overseas by himself during their marriage).

The rules for getting passports for minor children changed sometime between 1998 and 2007. My DW was the CP with sole physical and legal custody and was able to get a passport for SS when he was 6yo without the Sperm Idiot's participation. When we attempted to get a renewal in 2007 she could not get one without the Sperm Idiot's signature.

Not sure what changed but it was a complete PITA. All we were trying to do with the renewal was get SS a form of ID when he was 15 because he was getting harassed by the TSA when he traveled to Sperm Land for visitation. No ID is required for kids under 18 but at 14-15 SS was 6'1" tall and the TSA morons could not comprehend that he was not 18 or older. I think that many of the Sperm Clan work for the TSA.

We had already taken multiple international trips with no issues on SS's original passport. If we had renewed before his original passport expired maybe we would not have had the problems we had.

i looked at the state department rules about 2 months ago.

a child under 18 whose parents have joint legal custody must have signatures of both parents as well as provide photo ID for both parents.

for anyone who's interested or facing this themselves:
http://travel.state.gov/content/passports/english/passports/under-16.html

in looking at this again, it does look like we could get her one at 16 with just one parent. i guess waiting 3 years is better than waiting 5.

the majority of our vacations are abroad. weve never been able to take her with us. i wont lie, i enjoy vacations alone with fiance, but i know SD feels left out. i told fiance to tell her straight out she cant come with us because of her mother's refusal to sign the paperwork.

I don't think she could stop them from going if there's nothing in the CO specifically requiring her permission for them to travel (I can't imagine that would be the case) and the trip occurs completely on DH's time.

Our CO states we have to give 7 days notice of any travel plans and a general itinerary (flight times, where we'll be staying, and contact info). If yours doesn't require that, I would let the BM know just before you leave, or right as you land at the destination, via email with some high level info.

While you may not be REQUIRED to tell her where you're going, I think as a parent she has a right to know when her kids will be out of state, or out of country (even if it is a US territory). Just think if the roles were reversed and something happened on the trip .. wouldn't your DH want to know where they are and how to get a hold of them in an emergency?

I would just be very careful about how/what/when you communicate to her. Tell her at the latest possible minute so she can't interfere with travel plans, and give her a number to reach that you can control (you don't want her harassing the skid or your DH the entire trip).