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Question for SMs: Do you find to have a closer/better connection with your SSs or SDs?

Noneyet's picture

I want to know if there are any SMs out there who feel closer/more connected to their SKs based on their gender. Do you find it easier to have a connection with the boys or the girls, thier age, and also how it relates in dealing with BMs?! Are the BMs more of a pain with the girls or boys? Are there times where you may feel isolated because DH pays more attention to the SD/SS more and includes you in activities/functions more or less?... or does gender of the children play a role at all? :?

NCMilGal's picture

From what I've seen, there's more friction with SDs than with SSs - you get complaints about the boys being dirty and sullen, but you get the really wazoo stories about The Attitude about the girls.

I don't have a SS, so I can't compare. SD14 has started hero-worshipping me. It makes me uncomfortable. I think it's because she never sees me and when we do I am interested (okay, sometimes I have to pretend) in what is important to her, like her writing. I taught her how to write formal essays this summer, and have offered constructive critiques of her fiction. I also try to listen to what she has to say, and ask her opinion of real life issues; but her dad does that too, so it's not just me.

Again, DH and I don't see SD14 but for 4-10 weeks a year, so we're the Disney parents; it's all new and exciting, even if it's something tame like making dinner together.

wriggsy's picture

Although both skids can be...not very nice...I get along better with SS. He had always been more mellow, but that's changing as he reaches teendom. SD is a total horror most of the time, and is physically threatening, but SS is starting to make me nervous with his love for all things deadly. He collects BB guns, but they have to look like real handguns. He loves the Tour of Duty video games (he's going to be 12 next month), he loves watching "Deadliest Warrior" on TV, he has even made what he calls a bomb out of unpopped fireworks...we found this in his room after my daughter told on him. I have been informed by a teacher at his school last year that he overheard SS talking about making a bomb. In this day and time...that's a reportable offense, so he had to tell the principal. DH just says "He's all boy". I grew up with 3 brothers, have a few nephews and have been married to a Marine. I have never seen ANYONE this obsessed with killing! Not even the Marine exH was this bad!!! SS swears he will be going into the Army, so maybe they will teach him some respect when it comes to firearms and the like, but he makes me nervous.

This is the same kid that goes ga-ga with my neice who is just over a year old and will cuddle with you as long as you let him!!!