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Bath time. SD 8 will be 9 this December...

stepmami's picture

Submitted by stepmami on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 8:20pm

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Should her daddy still be helping with bathtime? My kids were bathing themselves by 7 years of age. I feel like I shouldn't say anything.... but I'm starting to think its getting a bit ridiculous.

How do you all handle bathtime? Its so weird to be in a house where I can't put my foot down (disengaged) or call the shots. I hate seeing my SO get ran over by his daughter every night because she is so needy. She spends 50/50 time at BM's and I KNOW she gets plenty of love and attention all around.

Is this more of the "guilty parenting" ?

How old is "too old" to bathe in front of your father? I never had a daddy in my life, and I raised my kids alone, so I have no point of reference.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 8:45pm

THis is ridiculous, 9 is way to old to be having daddy there while she bathes, nor anyone else for that matter. We had this issue with SS8 up until about 6 mths ago he couldn't bathe by himself, so I took away bath time and told him he was going to have to learn to shower like a big boy. Now he only takes showers and he does it by himself. Once a child reaches a certain age its not just a privacy issue its also opening yourself up to allegations from the ex if a custody battle ever turned ugly.

12yrstepmonster's picture

Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 9:41pm

I think it all depends. My dd has extremely thick hair. She needed help making sure it was rinsed. If I was busy you merchant DH would do it.

If the girl is hitting puberty I would say no dad- there's a privacy issue.

baseballgirly's picture

Submitted by baseballgirly on Wed, 10/12/2011 - 12:36am

I made my CL show his kids how to shower themselves when we moved in together because I certainly agree with Oi Vey... at 9 years old any child, boy or girl, should be taking care of their own personal hygiene. If they can't handle a bath by themselves, show them how to work the shower. 9 is way too old to rely on a dad for that.

ctnmom's picture

Submitted by ctnmom on Thu, 10/13/2011 - 10:32am

I am adamant about this one- Girls should be taught BY ANOTHER FEMALE about hygene, washing, etc. Does BM help her in the bath too? This is just wierd. I have 2 girls and I taught them both about hygene, sitting in a ladylike manner, etc. Women's lib or no, nobody wants to look at you hoochie when you're wearing a dress! hehe My DH was and is completely out of these discussions, he taught Perfectson about guy stuff and I handled the girls. I think if he had to bathe one of the girls at age 8 he would've died of embarrasment (as would they!)

steppinout's picture

Submitted by steppinout on Thu, 10/13/2011 - 10:33am

My DH still bathes ss's together in the bathtub. They are 8 and 10. Creeps me out but they are so infantile in every way, I guess it is to be expected. I gave up caring and now I just sit back and watch. How long will it go on 12? 15? 17?

Unhappy's picture

Submitted by Unhappy on Fri, 10/14/2011 - 3:31pm

My SO used to let his BD(5) at the time and BS(3) at the time take baths in our garden tube in the master bath. One day I walked into the bathroom and caught he BD spitting water onto her brother in a very inapropiate area. I spoke with SO and explained that his BD is to old for baths together with her brother anymore and that was it.

My BD(7) still needs help washing her hair. It's mid back length and super thick. But I do have her working on doing it by herself. She should have it down pretty soon.

Nine is to old. I thought the whole part of being a parent was teaching your kids how to do things on their own so that they can grow up to be responsible adults.