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exH sending me pictures

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:38am

My exH is sending me pictures of his new GF!! How sick and twisted is that? He's sent 4 so far & keeps asking what I think of her, do I think she's pretty, etc. All I've said is no comment. And get this, he told his GF that he sent them to me...and she gave him another one to send me, one she likes of herself. Who DOES that?! And WHY? That would be like me telling my DH to send pictures of me to BM. I'm very confused and pretty annoyed at this. Just needed to vent Wink

Comments

Harleygal's picture

Submitted by Harleygal on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:42am

Is that they're both trying to rub it in your face. New GF must think she really has herself a prize!

"OCD sucks"
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to destroy.
--Henri de Lubac

littlegrlzx4's picture

Submitted by littlegrlzx4 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:44am

that's bad all around. Any wonder he's your ex? Wink
Ignore. Who knows what their motiviation is and who cares.

bewitched's picture

Submitted by bewitched on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:45am

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

Is he thinking he's making you jealous? I can't think of any reason a guy would do that...especially since you've way moved on.

BMJen's picture

Submitted by BMJen on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:50am

Curosity has me though. What do you think of her? Wink

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:50am

He called when I said no comment and said he just wants to know my opinion of her. (He asks my opinion about EVERYTHING) I'm really baffled as to what his GFs motivation is though. Creeeeepy to me. And no, she's not that great looking. But thats besides the point!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Harleygal's picture

Submitted by Harleygal on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:03pm

to herself how you could have given up such a wonderful man. Little does she know, huh? I guess that's what my Scorpio intuition is telling me.

"OCD sucks"
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to destroy.
--Henri de Lubac

Serena's picture

Submitted by Serena (not verified) on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 11:58am

You used to be under the opinion he was worth being married to and you were obviously wrong about that, so what do you know?! Smile j/k

You should just tell him that you think she looks fantastic, she seems like a genuinely wonderful person, and you are very happy for the two of them. Throw him off with overkill kindness. Then NEVER respond to anything he sends you again.

That is WAAAYYY creepy.

JMC's picture

Submitted by JMC on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:00pm

JamaicanMeCrazy
DISNEY LIED...THERE IS NO 'HAPPILY EVER AFTER'

that she looks like she'd be a wonderful stepmom!! lol!!

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:06pm

Thats good, girls. I thought about having some fun with it, saying things like she should get into modeling, her hair is so beautiful (its permed with 80s bangs) and stuff like that }:) I thought she looked about 37 yrs old (he's 30) but apparently she's 29. Oops.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Serena's picture

Submitted by Serena (not verified) on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:17pm

I can't believe I dropped the ball on the SM crack!

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:21pm

Luckily my ex lives 3 states away. I really can't believe that one day I'M going to be the "BM"...if he ever gets serious with someone. That just trips me out! I never thought about it until I found this site LOL

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

WowjustWow's picture

Submitted by WowjustWow on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:14pm

Lol, Melis. That is very strange. I would just delete the emails and try not to respond to him.

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 12:18pm

Really? So no fun with this one? aww man!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

WowjustWow's picture

Submitted by WowjustWow on Fri, 05/01/2009 - 8:11am

Well, if it doesn't bother you, then hell yeah, have all the fun you want!

Maybe you can photoshop her pictures to make her fat or pregnant and send them back, so he can be enlightened on the possible future.

Or send him one back of a random person,and tell him "this is who I think you should be looking for, if you want my opinion that bad."

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Fri, 05/01/2009 - 3:17pm

Thats a good one, I must say!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 1:03pm

I think he may just be trying to make you jealous, or trying to prove to you that he has "moved on"... Is this his first "serious" gf since the two of you split?

As for her - whatever. She must think quite highly of herself to actually give him a picture to send to you. I was the opposite with our BM. I didn't want that crazy byotch to know what I looked like, my name, age, etc... She found it all out though...

I'd do one of two things:
1) ignore them, and they'll eventually get the hint, however this may cause them to think that you are in fact 'jealous'.
2) send back a picture to him of your happy, beautiful family!

I'd opt for #2 myself...

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 1:12pm

I actually don't think he's trying to make me jealous! I think he's actually looking for APPROVAL. Sick isn't it? We do actually get along (now) and he seems to want my opinion on everything! But I'm still baffled at her motivation. Maybe she wants me to know he's moved on and "hers" now...I don't know. I don't know how much she knows about me or what he's told her. Apparently they've been together for 3 months. The only other one that lasted this long was a 6 month-er, and he did the same thing then. Weird!!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 1:18pm

It does sound like he's looking for your approval.
As for her, yeah, she's probably letting you know subtly that he does have someone new in his life, and he's hers.
I wouldn't put too much weight to it, as you said, it's only been 3 months - and if you guys get along fairly well, I wouldn't want to rock the boat... Wait and see if she makes it past the 6 month mark! Smile

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 1:27pm

Ok so instead of having fun with it, I just replied that I don't need to see any pics, he shouldn't care what I think of her and I certainly don't care what she looks like. This was his response: "butthead". OMG, I'm dealing with an 8 yr old LOL whatever, I'm used to it I guess.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 9:41pm

And I want him...to jump off a bridge.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

WowjustWow's picture

Submitted by WowjustWow on Fri, 05/01/2009 - 1:44pm

That's about right for a man-boy.

belleboudeuse's picture

Submitted by belleboudeuse on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 2:48pm

Wow.

L O S E R !!!

He needs to get over himself and move on with his life.

My guess is that the new GF is a little insecure and jealous of you, so the photo SHE likes of herself is meant to make you feel a little insecure. Because in her head, you're rivals.

Bleck. Blow them off.

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

KittyKat's picture

Submitted by KittyKat on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 3:10pm

That IS wierd...the only thing that comes to mind is that in NO WAY is he ready for a relationship with HER when, obviously, he is till too concerned about how YOU feel. Whether he has "romantic" feelings for you any more, he needs to move on.
You clearly have. If GF wants a FUTURE with him, it's HER approval he should be seeking, not yours.

Eeew.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 4:01pm

Tell me about it! I deal with this super obsessive behavior daily. Its been over 4 years. Seriously, leave me alone! ugh...I've tried ignoring it, it doesn't stop. I actually LOVE when he has a new GF because it cuts his phones calls down from 6-7/day to 1-2/day. Once he even went 2 days without calling...ohhh it was heaven. The 6-monther GF he had broke up with him because he was still obsessed. This was last year. She would side with me because he would say stuff like I shouldn't be allowed to move on and give my son a stepdad without his permission (and he was serious) That girl went running, can't say I blame her Wink

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Georgie Girl's picture

Submitted by Georgie Girl on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 4:28pm

Geez. What did he expect for you to say? My ex does strange little things like this from time to time so I can relate. I would just ignore him. Negative attention is still attention and he just may be trying to get some sort of reaction from you. What a dork.

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 4:52pm

Thats exactly what it is Georgie. He wants my attention. DAILY. And this guy does NOT give up! I wish he would put that kind of determination towards something useful!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Hanny's picture

Submitted by Hanny on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 6:28pm

Don't get made at me anyone! But this sounds like the BM's that we all don't get along with. You know the ones who are still enmeshed with their ex's... I'm not saying your doing the inappropriate contacting...he is...but your going along with it. Do any of you see the similarity here other than me???

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 6:50pm

I have been saying forever that if he ever gets married or serious that the new one is going to think of me as the typical "BM" because of his actions. No, I don't go along with it. I have discouraged it from day one. I have tried ignoring, being rude, telling him to quit contacting me, blocking emails, not answering my phone, being nice...everything gets me the same result. An exH that will not stay out of my life and refuses to go away!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Georgie Girl's picture

Submitted by Georgie Girl on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 6:55pm

He would call me for the dumbest crap and then get mad at me and call me back because he was mad. ???? I just ignored him. Of course that just made him more angry but he eventually left me alone. One year he sent me a Christmas card with a picture of him and his then girlfriend and her daughter.

Maybe he wants you to know who the lucky lady in his life is because she has the prize now. LOL!!!! Biggrin

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 7:07pm

Okay, so how long did he do it to you? When we first divorced, he was psycho and angry (he did not want to divorce AT ALL...never even opened the divorce papers when he got served. Threw them in the trash) and now 4 yrs later he has learned that I will not speak to him AT ALL if he is not civil, had to threaten restraining orders...so now he has taken the opposite approach and tries to act like we're best buds and shares everything with me via email and attempted phone calls! One extreme or the other. My DH actually used to tell me (when I would ignore his then 30+ calls/day) that I need to just talk to him and quit being mean or hanging up!!!! That tactic didn't work either. I know there is something wrong with him, like BPD or OCD or something, but he's never been to a doctor.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 7:10pm

My DH is convinced its just best to be civil and let him act the way he feels he needs to. Did I mention my DH is a pushover? When my exH used to be psycho stalker obsessive & I would ignore phone calls or hang up by DH would tell me to just talk to him and stay calm. I couldn't so I chose to ignore, which apparently pissed the ex off more. We do get along now because he has learned being an asshole will get him zero communication, and he hates that. So now he acts like we're best buds and I don't want that either. He has no boundaries!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 7:11pm

Oh, and instead of finding it weird and creepy that he's sending me pics of his GF, my DH asks to see them like its no big deal! Okay, whatever!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

KittyKat's picture

Submitted by KittyKat on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 8:44pm

Perhaps you should send him some lovely ROMANTIC pictures of you and your H together (not gross, just LOVING) along with your own children together, detailed with all of the events that YOU as a FAMILY will be doing together. Cripes, make an ALBUM that he and his GF can peruse at their leisure...

Somehow, I think she's gonna BOLT, too....!!! Especially if she sees that you DON'T WANT HIM BACK, no way, no day!!

I still say....eeew!

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 8:51pm

LOL...I don't know if I have the energy to put that much effort into him...ughhh...usually its him that bolts, except the one, but any smart one will bolt!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 9:05pm

he's 30!!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Cheyenne Arizona's picture

Submitted by Cheyenne Arizona on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 9:15pm

What a dumb a**. Why are guys stupid? You are an ex for a REASON! Duh!

Cheyenne Arizona's picture

Submitted by Cheyenne Arizona on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 9:15pm

What a dumb a**. Why are guys stupid? You are an ex for a REASON! Duh!

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Thu, 04/30/2009 - 9:20pm

One of my best friends just married one of his friends, and he is on his myspace friends list. She just told me he has one of those "How well do you know me" quizes on his page & one of the questions was "What is my ex-wife's first name?"!!! WTH? Keep all mention of me off your friggin page! moron.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"