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Heregoesnothing's picture

Submitted by Heregoesnothing on Wed, 04/22/2015 - 7:44pm

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To avoid parenting because of a lazy DH? I am currently sitting in my sleeping DD2's room, while SS6 is going up and down the steps, DH is on the phone downstairs, not paying attention, I'm sure he expects me to help. I don't want to interact with SS again today. I want a little alone time after a long day and if it means hiding out and watching Netflix on my iPad in DD room so be it. Just wish I had a glass of wine. Do you ever want to scream Please please parent your child?!?

luchay's picture

Submitted by luchay on Wed, 04/22/2015 - 11:34pm

Well they're gone now of course

But back in the early days of SD hell I would hide out in my room or my study.

The I thought eff this! it's MY house and I will not let that little you know what chase me out of it. So I took back my house. Best thing was the day I walked in one Saturday morning and she was sitting watching TV (now remember this kid had me on ignore for a long time, she just pretended I did not exist, did not acknowledge my presence or speak to me at all.)

No-one else was up, I had dropped my dd's at dancing and got home and was looking forward to a quiet coffee and some morning TV. And there she was on the couch with those inane kids TV shows on - "Sam and Cat" "Dog with a BLOG" I HATE those sorts of shows.

So I walk in and set the coffee maker going, then wander into the lounge, she was holding the remote I walked right past without looking at her, speaking to her or acknowledging her presence in any way, just plucked that remote right out of her hand and sat in my seat, changed the channel, went and finished my coffee....

She just sat there stunned - it was SOOOO funny. I realise how mean and bitchy it sounds but she was 13/14 ish and had been a nightmare to me for two years. Reclaiming my house was the best feeling.

ClutterMusings's picture

Submitted by ClutterMusings on Thu, 04/23/2015 - 10:26am

I did for several years and it was the worst mistake I made, ever.

I've reclaimed my house and presence the best I know how. I now tell SD to entertain herself. I am not an entertainment show. I also do not pay expensive bills to live in a house I hate.

If it gets to that point again, I am packing my stuff, selling the house, and leaving. I will then find a home my BD and I can thrive in.

I will say that after having my BD, it put a lot of my past step-mom issues to rest. I WILL NOT sacrifice sanity or an unhealthy home at my BD's expense. No thank you.

It's amazing though, that after I got my voice and strength back in my own home how DH has stepped up to the plate. He knows that WE are the parents and responsible for a calm home. Otherwise, like I said, me and BD are out the door.

I hope that you too can find your strength again and reclaim your house. It will be one of the best things you can ever do for yourself and sanity.