BM tried that the one and only time we had a sit down because she wasn't going to let the kids near some woman she didn't know (even though they'd already stayed at my house) anyway everytimes she tried to bring up SO all I'd say was "Your relationship failures is not why I am here I'm here about the kids and that is the only thing I will discuss" after the third time she screamed at me "My relationship was not a failure!" lol I just started the obvious "So that's why he's with me?" she left and I made my point day one

Like lovn life, NPD BM used to project all kinds of stuff onto my sweet, easy going DH - she used to say he had a "black heart" - sheesh - most of my friends have said he is one of the kindest men they have met.

But I would NOT acknowledge any emails or any other communications she sends you. Don't cast your pearls before swine. Ignore, ignore, ignore.

Nope. But we did struggle with my Skid's toxic Sperm Grandma who was controlling to the point that she would try to get involved in our marriage and family. We also had to deal with the Sperm Idiot who would occasionally try to mark his territory by getting the Skid to "See if your mom still loves me" and by calling my amazing bride every few years or so with the tearful "I miss you soooo much and want to be a family again" crap. My DW would just laugh at him and hang up. If the manipulations were routed through the Skid she would have our attorney hand him his ass in a shredding letter and inform him that the shit stopped now or we would bare his idiot ass in court yet again and nail him for yet more CS. If he wanted to be a family with my bride and their kid he should have thought of that before he cheated on her with a 16yo (he was 26) and went on to spawn 3 more also out of wedlock children by 2 more baby mamas.

DW had SS when she was 16 and the Sperm Idiot was 24. She went on to graduate from HS with her class with honors, a dual major BS with honors, an MBA with honors and a successful career as a CPA. The Sperm Idiot went on to continue his life as a pathetic loser.

Even now that SS is 21, a viable self supporting adult and has put the Sperm Clan far behind him the toxic morons will occasionally try to dredge up ancient history to build sympathy for their shallow and polluted gene pool. We just dust off the facts and smack the piss out of them by holding the fact mirror up in front of their faces and they crawl back under their rock for a few more years.

Other than the pure entertainment value of their toxic bullshit we do not tolerate their crap or engage with them at all. Fortunately for him my SS rarely does either.

There's a poster who is going through a divorce. Turns out her husband lied about BM. BM was telling the truth about how awful her husband was.

I remember another poster wanted to know if she should tell her kid's SM that her ex was hurting on her. Every one pretty much agreed SM should know what her husband was doing, but she would never believe BM.

Before I completely cut her off, she would send me her "version" of everything. Great long novellas of her version of each story. Never ever requested, mind you.

I very soon came to understand that the more she wrote, the more she was lying. Only a a few words response? Possibly the truth. 500 word essay? Just count all the lies in the content. (actually, it was pretty funny because she would contradict herself in her writing. She would start with one claim of innocence, and then there would be two or three statements to contradict herself after lol)

Now I have her email go to a folder I never see. I never EVER communicate with her in any fashion. Don't even step into this toxic water, these BM's are certifiable and unworthy of your attention.

When DH and I first got together BM would walk over to the truck and ask if we could meet and talk and would point to SS and say "Him not DH". Based on the fact that she still wanted DH back but was spouting off lies to the public I always came up with a reason to be busy.

Yea. My husband's ex did this via email. The funny part is that I already knew about the things she listed as examples of what a terrible person he supposedly is. The email had nothing to do with DH's character at all. It was all about her feelings about getting dumped since he was the only man she's ever been with. Lmao. Like I care? Also, way to make yourself look totally pathetic. No dignity.

I soon learned that EVERYTHING is always about her. She can't even manage simple correspondences about kid events without telling DH all about her emotional distress of the day.

I have very strong opinions about my ex but would never tell any of his new love interests. People break up because they can't get along and each party feels wronged on some level. It takes two to tango, as they say. Some people just don't get that.

Yeah, I got that phone call early on. I hung up on her after the first sentence out of her mouth. When she called back, I told her if she EVER called me again, I'd sue her for harassment. She never called me again.

Now, 17 years later, she tells everybody she feels sorry for me (for being with DH). Like I need or want her pity. She needs to save it for herself since her most recent BF just left her (on Valentines Day).

Long before emails existed my soon-to-be wife put me on the phone with her first husband. He warned me that she was crazy in many ways and to not marry her. Of course I didn't listen and marrying her was THE single worst mistake I made in my life.

Her first born and our kids are still screwed up by having her as a mother.

But your bio-mother has had her say. You've had your chance to listen. Now you can block her emails and cell phone (call your provider for help) as well as social sites such as Facebook. Make sure you don't snoop around on hers and get riled about some stupid and irrelevant thing she may say.

I hate to admit that many years ago I made a crazy bio-mom mistake of telling the other woman that "if she ever had any questions about why my relationship with my ex went south she could give me a call". However, in my defense, it was the break-up of my first marriage, my kids were 7 and 3 and my husband went off and knocked up the other woman after knowing her for barely a month (before I even filed for divorce). Needless to say, I was not in my right mind, had never been through something so traumatic, and didn't know which way was up. My intent was not to ruin their relationship, but out of a genuine concern that my husband was such an ASS I didn't want him to hurt anyone else the way I had been hurt. Saying this now, really makes little sense, but I swear that was my mindset at the time. They went on to get married, stayed together for 7 years and ultimately went through a very bitter divorce. I never did get a phone call from her. LOL. Now that I'm remarried to a man with a severely bitter ex-wife and daughter, I've learned a thing or two. DH's ex tried the talk with me about what a loser my DH is and how she married a man she never loved, and I stopped her right in her tracks. Told her I'm sorry their relationship didn't work out, but it takes two to be dysfunctional and I wasn't part of that equation. I told her things have been great between myself and DH and I'm really not interested to know what didn't make them work, that was between them, many years ago. That was the last time I talked to her (about 6 years ago) and DH and I have been together 9 years now. Not saying we're perfect by any means, but we've got most stuff figured out. I think BM's 45 now and still lives at home with her mother. LOL

Our crazy BM is someone I was friends with in high school. We had a falling out, she got accidentally knocked up, I met SO 3 weeks after SD was born. After a year of causing issues, BM and I attempted to be friendly again. She would casually tell me how crappy of a person he is and how he's emotionally and verbally abusive, but whenever I'd ask what he did/said for her to say this about him she'd reply "I'm not telling you so I can protect you." Um, ok. I guess because I didn't fall for her crap she didn't want to be "friends" anymore because it's been 2 years of straight up hell from her since then and still no sign of this abusive SO she speaks about. Go figure.

BM is convinced that DH and I were having an affair and that I'm the reason they divorced.

For a while after we first got serious together, I would get a random email saying something like, "Just wanted to let you know that DH and I had sex on xyz date while we were separated" or "On abc date I gave DH oral in the car".

I showed them to DH and eventually replied to her, "Why in the world would I care about his sex life before I even met him?"

I got these texts too. How he wasn't there when SD was a baby. She failed to mention that he worked 70 hours a week in a factory to support her and SD. She also failed to mention that SO found a conversation between her and another man on Skype that included things like Bm needed to wear a skirt because it's easier to have a quickie in. Or the fact that she hit him a lot. I'm sure he did things that weren't great either. In reality, 95% (yes I made up this statistic) realtionships fail due to both parties. The fact of the matter is, I really don't care. SO is wonderful with our infant son and is always there for him. Most people learn from their mistakes. I wasn't always perfect in my past relationships either. My SO and I have learned from past relationships and so far, ours has been great. Not without a few bumps in the road, but nothing I would leave him over.

Our BM has left me numerous messages when we had a house phone instead of individual personal cells - 'Most, I am here for you. I know what you are going through with him. Please call me if you ever want to talk, I will understand.'??

Umm, you are the last person I would ever call if I had a problem BM!!!

There was a time when 'sd' and I argued on e-mail (yeah right her mom was not involved), and I asked - if dh is so awful, why are you guy crying and begging him to come back there? Why would you send your child willingly many times to someone so awful and why would she agree to come??

Crickets!!!!! so glad both BM/SD gave up on trying to tell me 'the truth'. I have been married to DH for many more years than you ever were - so I think I know him as much as or more than you do b.!!

It's so funny when I see sm's posting here like their dh's hung the moon. I wonder how many of you fell for his load of crap like I did mine and in a year, or five, you are going to be saying, "wth was I thinking?!"

After splitting with my exh I did become friends with his first wife and found out all the lies he told me about her. She struggled with whether or not she should warn me about him and her mom told her to leave it alone, that I would never believe her.

I wish she HAD said something, not that I would have believed her. But you never know. Some of you are married to psychopaths right now and you are figuring out how many lies you've been told and he can do it so easily. Sometimes it's the man that's crazy, not the bm.

BM tried this. However she had already showed her crazy to me so I just ignored her. She kept trying to figure out what DH or his family had told me about their past. I told her I never cared to ask, so I never found out & I still don't care.