A Hard Lesson for SS
As I had mentioned on here before,my SS now 18 has been in a little of habit of going out and scoring weed on a weekly basis and bringing it back to the house to do with his own enabling mother...
I tried having it out with them but all she does is justify it,and he's cocky as ever because he's under the false impression that mom will protect him like she always has. Well I think it's time for a little lesson,I've been mulling over it and so far the only thing I could think of is to take it to the authorities to try and throw some sort of scare into him and take him down a notch.
So what I was thinking of doing was calling them and have them catch him on his route and maybe check him out a little. I'm not sure what exactly would happen and don't want it to blow up in my face,but something's got to be done already with this slacker.
No other children,we're set.
No other children,we're set.
She doesn't have a car or
She doesn't have a car or drive,it's the city so they can get everywhere on public. I don't think she would bother to hire an attorney as they are guilty as charged,what are they going to fight? I only wish I had a recorder on when we had the discussion that we're going different directions because she 'sees nothing wrong' with what she's doing,meanwhile I'm at a stage in life where I'm trying to get better jobs/move up in life.
If he did get stopped it would be because I called and instructed them;
Feeling as you do, why is it
Feeling as you do, why is it not a deal breaker that your wife is using weed in the home as well? Even if SS is out of the picture, she will continue. Is that OK? If not, why do you stay in the relationship?
It will not throw a scare into him anyway, not much will happen unless he is a big time dealer.
She is currently on pain
She is currently on pain medications,and like so many others is using the excuse 'medical marijuana is safer than prescrips,...even though technically it's not passed in this state. So technically I'm not sure where I stand on just her using it for her 'pain management' if it were just her,but using him to get it for her doesn't sound right to me. She's implicating him in so many ways,including ruining what future he might have.
It may scare him because knowing the way he is,has been sheltered most of his life and turns into a crybaby whenever something outside of his routine goes down and expects someone to always save him. He's technically an adult now so time to start learning some things.
She used to do it in high
She used to do it in high school and is a big promoter of it,and he started doing it with his friends a couple years ago so now they just share in it. Nice way to go eh? As I've argued with her many times,he's 18 is not even out of school yet and has no aptitude for a job...meanwhile when we were growing up we were already going to school and working at age 16. She should be training him up for the world,but so far the only world she's 'trained' him for is the slacker world.
And I can't kick them out,her name is on the mortgage. I wish I could,but it's easier anyway for me to bail since I know I'll go and won't come back.
I don't get the difference
I don't get the difference between "She used to do it" and "Now just shares in it." She is using weed. Period. Then it should be a no-brainer unless this it is OK for her and not for him, and that doesn't make sense at all. It sounds like "I hate my SS because he is a loser and uses weed, my wife is the same way and uses weed, but I am OK with that."
Like I had mentioned,she
Like I had mentioned,she claims it helps her back pain. She is older and on disability anyway so is not really going anywhere,though I told her I don't endorse her just getting baked all day. Him on the other hand has a whole future ahead and doesn't need that slagging him down. I also don't endorse them doing it together as it just becomes an enabling thing.
Call the police every time SS
Call the police every time SS scores his weed. I am assuming his enabling mother is your wife. I would put them both in jail to cool their heels for a while were I you. I would waive your right not to testify against your wife were I you and I would help the DA nail them both to the wall. I do not tolerate lack of character very well.
But... that is just me.
Good luck.
I don't tolerate it very well
I don't tolerate it very well either,which is why it's been such a rough road.
I have told her that I was gonna have them nailed and she came back with the law would just laugh it off,uhh no I've read up on it they arrest and fingerprint everyone.
But anyway that would really be my out because she said she wouldn't stand for that...now she knows what it feels like and she doesn't like it one bit. Well too bad spoiled people,time to grow the hell up.
I was just trying to scare
I was just trying to scare them a little. I was reading the local DEA site and they claim no amount is too small to follow up on...and even if they show up at the door that might be enough to show I'm serious.
Anyway we just had another blowout because of this. Maybe it's a deflection,but she 'caught' me texting with a 'woman',and even though it was just a female friend to vent with she got all out of sorts and I turned it back around also and said I felt I wasn't being heard on this and that's why I was talking to others.
She claims she'll watch herself too now so we'll see how long this installment lasts^
I don't have any advice for
I don't have any advice for you, but I do have a personal story. I have an aunt who is now in her 60's and her son (my cousin) is in his 30's. They have both been in and out of rehab over the last 15 years or so. They drug-share. Pills, heroin, pot, etc.. At this point they are both in very bad mental and health states. They have been to counselling, rehab, you name it. He can never hold a job. He's been to prison. Nothing helps because they are STILL LIVING TOGETHER and nothing ever breaks the cycle. It gets worse and worse with no end in sight. My point is, this type of situation just never seems to get better and it's like a snowball. No one else in our family are like this. Just those 2. I have no idea why.
I hope something changes for you. It's a horrible way to live. I see it.