DH only communicates with BM via text message. We will send an occasional letter. He will not answer her calls and he usually ignores her texts as well and will let me respond in the evening when he gets home.

This is a volatile situation with a restraining order against BM in place. We have reminded her of the restraining order recently and the "no contact" part in particular and now we have even less to deal with.

My brother and my SIL had a very hostile divorce. I love both of them so sometimes I was the go between person. They have not spoken to each other in decades. My nephew is now 30 years old and is a great young man. He seems pretty normal to me so it worked. BM and my brother lived almost 3000 miles apart also.

From my own DH's experience, limiting communication to only email was the best thing that could have happened. The BM in my life used to make verbal agreements with my DH but then renege at the last minute stating she 'never agreed to it.' Now all of their communication can be printed out and used in court and she can't pretend she never said it.