Do I tell her?
A close family friend (lost touch over the years but talk every once in awhile) has been dating a divorced younger guy that has 2 children ages 7 and 9 for six months and they just rented a place together. The girls live with their mom 4 hours away so they only see them holidays and summer vacation. They want the girls more but BM won't agree to more time blah blah blah.
My friend just cannot understand BM and FDH calls them and she ignores the calls and won't let the girls talk to him etc. But the skids are SO great and they do make-overs when they are there, they do arts and crafts and it's so fun having them and my friends bio gets along great with the girls and they NEVER argue when they are all together...... :sick: :sick: :sick:
I want to burst her bubble and say JUST WAIT!!!!!! I'm literally bursting at the seams to tell her that while at first everything seems great things WILL change. The problem is, she didn't ask my opinion and she's still in the blissful honeymoon stage. I so badly want to tell her to run and don't look back. She's just as blind as I was walking into my relationship and I feel like I should warn her but I don't want to seem like a bitter crazy person LOL.
So do I let her figure it out? Or should I give her a gentle warning???????
She wouldn't listen I would
She wouldn't listen
I would encourage her to take it slow, really slow and to keep her former living arrangement available if at all possible. Since they are renting together, that is a nice temporary thing which is sort of good at this point.
Advise her to pay attention to the yellow and red flags. Some of which she has already mentioned. Ask her how that will work for her when they are trying to make plans to take a trip with or without the kids - for example.
If she asks, tell her
If she asks, tell her marrying a guy with kids is very difficult. She won't beleive you at first (I wouldn't have when I was younger, I thought nobody could resist my charm, LOL!). But if she stays, she will. there's not much you can do. Even if you gave her this site address and she checked it out, she may be so infatuated that she disregards it. Sometimes we have to learn things the hard way.
Yea, I worded it carefully bc
Yea, I worded it carefully bc I didn't want her to think I was comparing relatioships etc but I said SD15 is really jealous and it makes it hard dealing with the ex and stepkids and puts a huge strain on the relationship-love him to death but somedays it doesn't seem worth it.....She responded and said he's the best guy ever and somedays it doesn't seem worth it to her either :? Is that my cue????
At six months I was still on cloud 9, still to this day it was the happiest time of my life. If she is already feeling that way at 6 months I'm sure shes in for a long bumpy road......
Hell - I tell who will listen
Hell - I tell who will listen that I would not do this again...That it was all hunky dorky until everyone was under one roof. And then all bets were off...
Warn her!
Yup, what Jsmom said. It's
Yup, what Jsmom said. It's all pizzas and blow jobs in the beginning, but then people's masks start to slip!
LOL!! I miss pizzas
LOL!! I miss pizzas