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AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH !!!!

LOSTTHEWILTOLIVE's picture

Aaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!

This is MY life:

10 years of being in a relationship with SO = 3650 days

SO daughter is now 16 ½ years old (don’t forget the half) & SO son is 19 yrs. old
SO has been divorced 12 years!!!!!

Me I have been divorced 18 years – this wasn’t the end of the world honest – my daughter is happy, got a great job, great boyfriend and she is respectful, well mannered, courteous and balanced!!!!!! DIVORCE didn’t damage her.

In 10 years 521.4 weekends ruined by BM & her daughter – we have had to follow BM rules re holidays / Christmas / school / weekends / evenings etc. etc. etc.

Ex-wife is bitter and twisted even though she got the house and £1000.00 per month maintenance – this was NOT a court order this is what she demanded – Ex-wife - BM works 2 ½ days a week!!!!!!!!

Did I say she is the ONLY one ever to be divorced in the whole world!!!!!

SO you are NOT the only divorced dad in the world – it’s not a crime – it happens to millions of people – you haven’t killed anybody.

240 days since SO and I decided it was time for us finally – I put my house up for sale and I was going move in with him short term – he was going to do his house up to sell and then we would buy one together.

This has been the plan for 10 years to give HIS children particularly HIS daughter time.

210 days since his 16 ½ year old daughter threw a temper tantrum about us moving in together and she MOVED IN with my SO - her dad.

40 days since my house was taken off the market – so 10 years of plans and waiting, OMG waiting for HIS daughter to grow up GONE down the pan!!!!!

30 weekends ruined since HIS daughter moved in – we have to fit in around her / what she is doing / if she is unwell / got a party / got to be taken or picked up from somewhere etc. etc. etc. Drama / drama / drama – attention seeking / rude / childish and petulant – she cries and cries and she says she doesn’t know why so my SO buys her all the time.

For example: I want / need a new bed, I want/ need my bedroom decorating, I want / need new clothes, I want / need new jeans, I want / need new shoes, I’m cold I want / need a new coat, I want/ need a full length mirror, I want / need hair dye & make up, I want to go here, I want to go there – I want / need - I want / need - I want / need – do you get the ‘jist’ !!!!

30 weekends ruined by HIS ex-wife too – she won’t make plans to see HER daughter, if plans are made she changes them at last minute e.g. if she is having her hair done / going out etc. etc. etc.

Does SO challenge this? NO he does not!!!!

I say something – I get all his *hit dumped on me – he is fed up / no-one supports him – he can’t do right from wrong – from now on he is going to *uck the lot of us (nice!!!) from now on he is going to do his own thing (really I thought you already did). Aaaaw bless him he is feeling very sorry for himself I think!!

HELLO WHO AM I – WHAT ABOUT MY LIFE TOO!!

Oh and his ex-wife of 12 years can slate me, make verbal threats about me – threaten to come and sort me out (ha ha I wish she would – she is bloody hilarious) – Does he back me up? Does he defend me? Does he stand up to her? NO HE DOESN’T – but that’s OK it’s only me – I am not related – we have only been in a relationship for 10 years. Maybe I would count more if I tell him I want a ‘divorce’ he might take more notice of me!!!

Please note: I HAVE SPOKEN TO HER OR BEEN IN HER COMPANY FOR THE WHOLE 10 YEARS!!!! (Wow that was cunning of me)

What is it with these divorced bio families?

Why do they think they are the only ones divorced with children? Aaaw shame!!
Why do they think the world revolves around them? It doesn’t!!
Why do they think the world owes them? Again it doesn’t!!
Why can’t they move on? Ooh I wish they would!!
Why do they suck the life out of ‘steps’? Oooh they suck the life right out of you!!!
Why can’t they get a grip?
Why are they so draining?
Why can’t SO grow a pair? (Balls!)
Why can’t SO have a bit of back bone?
Why do SO’s feel guilty for leaving? Do they not think about why they actually had to leave in the 1st place – because it was HELL!!!
Why do they have to make everyone around them miserable? Oh boy they do!!!!
They are Oxygen Stealers!!

I have got news for them:

It’s not just you / you are not that special / you are pathetic / you are appalling people and role models / DIVORCE is NOT the end of the world / Your kids are the only children to be in a divorced family.

SERIOUSLY GET A GRIP /MOVE ON / STOP BEING BITTER / THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOU / YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONES DIVORCED / LIFE IS TOO SHORT / LEAVE STEP’S IN PEACE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I AM DONE!!!!!

Thank you for reading / listening and allowing me to vent – I love this site it is my saviour and I take my hat off to all you steps out there – you are all marvellous women – I feel so much better Wink

LOSTTHEWILTOLIVE's picture

Hi newwife3 - i know it i have felt like have been having an affair too at times - oh well ........ Blum 3 Blum 3

Orange County Ca's picture

So tell us are you going to throw some more years on the pile of wasted ones? This guys daughter will continue to run his life until you're gone one way or another.

LOSTTHEWILTOLIVE's picture

Hello Orange County - thanks for your post.

Right now i have manically cleaned my home from top to bottom (my therapy ;)) and my home looks lovely - then i made myself a nice dinner - had a wonderful bubble bath and pamper and now having a glass or 2 of wine - purely medicinal of course and relaxing with no drama and it's bliss Smile

Only time will tell...........

onebright1's picture

I wish I could copy and paste your post to my Facebook page and make it public and Nutburger and the skids could see it. But I am not allowed. ( by me) . I have to fight the urge to do that . . .
I do love your vent though Wink

amber3902's picture

I feel your pain.

I have wanted to scream the same thing at times.

YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY DAD WHO ONLY GETS TO SEE HIS KID EVERY WEDNESDAY AND EOW.

YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY KID IN THE WORLD WHOSE PARENT'S AREN'T TOGETHER ANYMORE.