Im a step mom...but its MY ex thats acting nuts!
Ok guys, here goes.
My sons BF has been and always will have a vindictive, mean spirit about him. Most people don't have the time or energy to do the crazy things he does. Things have gotten out of control and my family needs help.
for years, he has been on a mission to constantly build a case against me; trying to paint the picture that I'm a horrible person. I can only chalk it up to jealousy, being a control freak and domineering. He doesn't like being told "No" and becomes very belligerent and abusive when I stand up for myself. While in a relationship with him not only was he mentally and emotionally abusive, but he was physically abusive as well. He's a police officer and has a tendency to beat the charges set against him with a protective order. I was afraid of him then and now, even married to a great guy, Im still afraid of him.
When I moved 3 hours away to get married and start a new job he stayed on a mission to build a case against me. Me, on the other hand, just wanted to come to a mutual agreement regarding visitation and support and be civil. THAT NEVER HAPPENED! He kept me in court 3-4 times per month, having to drive 3 hours away to court. It kept me out of work and eventually fired. That affected my household money and needless to say, my ability to be as stable as he "appeared".
Every time I would get a new job, he would start the false show-causes and the cycle would continue. By the time the custody hearing transpired, I looked so unstable the courts took away my baby. I WAS SO HURT! The courts knew I was in a battered womens shelter on account of him and he had kicked me out at 8 months pregnant - and they took my little one from me. No, I don't drink or do drugs. I don't party...Im married to an awesome man whom Ive known for 10 years and been with for 5. I just wanted a peaceful life finally...but this judge...OMG what a crack pot!
To this day he is verbally abusive, and puts my son in the middle of situations that HE creates. I'm someone else s wife but he still tries to control me. (which isnt working for my husband)
At this point I just dont know what to do. I need a clever lawyer who can trip him up in his lies and expose him.
Gee, sounds like that cop
Gee, sounds like that cop Drew Peterson...accused of killing his wife who he claims disappeared.
Sorry to hear he is such a jerk.
Try to find the money to hire
Try to find the money to hire a GOOD lawyer. I seems the one you currently have may not have the skills to deal with the judge that you have been seeing.
I am very sorry to hear about
I am very sorry to hear about how the system has additionally worked againist you when it should have protected you from people like your ex. I also had an EX exactly like yours. Only mine did not have the resources as a police officer. But he was smart enough to use the court system againist me. FYI. 10 years later and I still have to bring my DH with me to pick up and drop offs because he will still be verbally abusive.
My advice to you ~ Stop reacting and be proactive. I am sure that during the time you have know him, he has done Something which can be used againist him. No one is perfect. Find it and use it to file complaints against him to his superior officers. Beware~ he will either come after you even worse or back off. If he was physically abusive to you, does he abuse your child? If so, call child protective services.
Also, ask to have the hearings via phone conference if possible. I don't know what kind of hearings he is dragging you into court for, but where I live any child support hearing can be done via a phone conference. I did that also with my Ex. That actually helped to stop the flow of Support modifications that he kept filing, only because he was not able to "force the court to make me come in".
Use this website to find a lawyer. http://www.martindale.com/
It should help you find someone who has a "personal" relationship with this jurisdiction and possibly the Judge. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING - Conversations, emails, etc. I wish you lots of luck.