An Update to, " It's Hard To Even Think About"...

So, After gaining my composure and sleeping on it, I calmly approached my DH about what his son said to my daughter. As we drank our coffee I said, "Hey babe, I think(SS) still thinks that you still love his mother." My husband's face snarled a little and he said frustratedly, " What makes you say that?" I replied, " Well, my daughter and I were talking last night and she mentioned that as early as a few months ago my SS said, "I think my Dad still loves my Mom." Immediately, my husband flipped off the deep end, got the kids out of bed, threw the centerpiece off the dining room table and started yelling. The part that is a show stopper is that he got mad at me for even bringing it up (Way to display unity and solidarity dumb ass!), he zeroed in on my daughter and got mad at her saying that she should have never said anything to me b/c she knew it would upset and hurt me to think about it. He said that he wasn't mad at his son!

Here's a little more insight into the history... For 6 years I've dealt with women coming forward once we began dating, either wanting to get back in the picture, being nasty to me because that's how stupid women are, or his ex constantly trying to small talk my husband, talk shit about me to his oldest, whom he has custody of, and their 2 younger ones that still live with her. His mother (my lovely mother in law _ NOT), has made racially charged comments to my husband behind my back about White people, my newborn daughter (whose 1/2 white) and whites in general. Having said that, the one thing in common about all of these different scenarios is that he has avoided each and everyone of them like the plague. When an ex came back from the past he "didn't have a chance" to tell her he was involved in a new relationship. When his mom talks shit and isn't so nice to me, or parks outside our home in our parking lot unannounced and stalks us,he gets furious but never tells HER that. He just tells me, and acts like everything is OK towards her. When his mom comes in our house and just walks into our bedroom at her will, he gets mad and tells me about it later, but says NOTHING to her to stop the problem. When his kids mother, his ex of 12 years fills the kids heads with negativity and intimidation ( and then they bring that drama to our house)his solution is to tell them, " If you want to bring that bullshit here and you claim not to like my wife so much when shes done nothing but take care of you, then you can stay the fuck in Virginia Beach. Instead, of confronting his dumb ass jealous and bitter ex, putting her in her place and stepping up for his kids, he'd rather tell them to not come back.

He will not address any of the issues that have come up over time..over and over again. I explained to him that if you continue to sweep your problems under the rug, they will keep surfacing until you deal with them..or they'll deal with you. His avoidance in killing the relationship but he wants to blame me. Im furious and REFUSE to apologize for lookin out for his sons mental well being. Im sick of evil ass people trying to start shit, and in my eyes, him letting them by being avoidant.

Can anyone help me? Im not in a position to leave, I have noone and only a part time job. I cant change him and cant fix what is his responsibility to address.