You are here

What to do...

mommadukes2015's picture

Submitted by mommadukes2015 on Wed, 11/15/2017 - 1:01pm

So BM didn't show up or call last weekend which is to be expected. I would imagine the little tid bit of info on being held accountable for back child support set her off.

Anyway, she texted SO giving him the same schpeel she gave me, boss is refusing to cooperate with IWO, she didn't know she was behind (Eye roll) and she's making a payment THIS week plus $50 to get caught up. This money is supposedly coming from a new job that she secured this week (maybe it's Pizza Hut again?), I wonder if she knows she has to report her change in employment? Doubt it. Anyway, she then tells him that this new job will give her a more predicable schedule and she wants to see SS more often (If I had a dollar for every time we've heard this...) blah blah blah.

THEN she asks SO if he can drop SS off at Uncle's this weekend as her sister is living there now and she doesn't have access to a car and literally-the same old song and dance.

I feel some type of way. Which leaves me wondering:

1.) Do we bring SS to Uncle's as requested (I mean we just feed him and cloth him for 2 years with barely any help from BM) so why not sacrifice the gas too?
2.) Will BM even spend any time with SS seeing as her sister is there or will she show up for a couple hours and then ditch him for some dude?
3.) Does any of this even matter? He would be with Aunt who I'm sure he would be glad to see anyway and worst case scenario we know Aunt won't let BM leave with him

Should we just take the kid to see his mom even if he spends the weekend with Aunt? It's a 45 minute drive both ways-and we'd probably have to pick him up too. I don't know if I should reach out to Aunt to make sure this is cool with her or encourage SO to do it (which if I told him he should he probably would).

I don't know-our Custody Order says "open and liberal visitation as agreed upon by both parties" that's it.

Anyone have an opinion? I'm on the fence.

Comments

advice.only2's picture

Submitted by advice.only2 on Wed, 11/15/2017 - 1:08pm

What does your DH want to do? Have you talked about it with SS? I think the best course of action will be whatever disrupts SS the least, honestly if she can't be bothered to figure out a way to see or even speak to her kid on the phone, why should you guys have to bend over backwards for her?

mommadukes2015's picture

Submitted by mommadukes2015 on Wed, 11/15/2017 - 1:12pm

He hasn't said much, but I know he's on the fence too. If I told him I thought he should bring him, he probably would.

And you have a point. We don't tell SS about BM's plans until they are solidified-BM on the other hand will call him or ask us to have him call her, and promise him the moon just to no call no show. She's done this more times than I can count on my fingers and toes, your fingers and toes and sasquatch's giant fingers and toes.

simifan's picture

Submitted by simifan on Wed, 11/15/2017 - 1:42pm

I wouldn't do that. BM can participate in the process or no go. I counter with that doesn't work for me, but I'll be more than happy to pick him up.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Submitted by ProbablyAlready... on Wed, 11/15/2017 - 2:24pm

She doesn't have access to a car... Bound sounds like she has a level-headed sister. That she could ask to drive out there and get SS with her... Then you know SS is safe and looked after, and that saves you like a solid hour and a half of driving time! lol

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Thu, 11/16/2017 - 4:18am

sorry I would not do it, SS should be with his father or his mother, not with some one in her family for her to see him half an hour...

if she can't come to your town, book a hotel room and really pay attention to her child then I would not take him away to strangers with the hope she will be there.. SS is not her Uncles responsibility he's her responsibility..