There has to be others who feel the same way.

The latest was last evening I told DH that I did not want to take four children to the at&t store to see why his watch was not working. He wanted to do the is as a family...Why? Why would we all need to go to the store for his watch? Then it went as far as...well you need things at Target they are in the same complex so you take two kids and i take two kids and we kill two birds with one stone. Once again the answer i gave was "No". Am i the only mother who would prefer to stay home if you know your children can not behave in public? It is embarrassing the way they behave some times and quite frankly it is easier to do these little task by myself.
The argument then turned in to the fact that "I do not know how to be a mother to four children at one time"...to that I pointed out ALL of the things I do for the children. I am sorry that if it takes not taking the children out to make my night easier...then so be it. After going out earlier in the week and being embarrassed with my SS (5) behavior...then having my DD (4) mock him...no thank you. I work fulltime and that was the last thing I wanted to do yesterday. Our free night from sports and i want to go to the cellphone store and wait for your watch to be fixed??? Nope. Sorry I don't. I would much rather stay home. I left he house this morning not talking to DH....

He says it is poor parenting if you can't do what you need to do whether you have kids or not. So from now on he is willing to just do things with all four children and exclude me. I look at it as a peaceful night for me! It will only last so long.....best of luck.

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I have 2 children who are

I have 2 children who are exceptionally well behaved. I DON'T want to take them grocery shopping etc every week. I must be a terrible mother.

I'm with the others that I

I'm with the others that I don't want to take my 1 bio-child to the cell phone store, so I completely relate on that level, too, but the fact remains, if you don't know how to parent 4 kids, then it's probably because you're not their bloody parent!

Did you birth (or adopt, whatever) 4 children? Because if you did, I think your DuH's observation would be fair. If they're yours by blood or by law, they're your responsibility, but that doesn't seem to be the case here.

Perhaps he--in all his parental glory--should have just taken his poorly behaved precious cherubs and left you home to "work on" your parenting skills with your bio kids.

Two children are mine (s 11

Two children are mine (s 11 and D 4). Two are his (SS 5 and SD 7).

WHy did you not simple tell

WHy did you not simple tell him... I'm not the mother of 4 kids, why should I play mother to 4 kids :?

^^^Nailed it!!!!^^^

ANOTHERSTEP2 "Von Trapp

ANOTHERSTEP2 "Von Trapp Family".....LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

It's just plain stupid to

It's just plain stupid to take 4 kids to run errands if it's not necessary. Let him have all the fun, he can take all 4 kids everywhere he goes. See how long that lasts.

Being able to take the kids running around with you, and choosing not to when it's not necessary, are two different things. To me, it's about how to best manage your time and keep yourself sane. Taking even one kid on errands can slow down the whole trip (depending on age).

We took my SD to run errands and shop sometimes, she was very well behaved, but it was still quicker to do things when she wasn't with us. And since she's lazy and I could shop ALL day back then, she preferred we did it without her!

I don't take OTHER people's

I don't take OTHER people's misbehaving kids out, not my responsibility to teach them how to behave and I refuse to put up with it.

You're not the mother of four

You're not the mother of four children so why should you have to learn to be one? I don't know how you kept your temper in check, girl. The nerve of him trying to shame you in to doing what he wanted. Does this happen often?

No not often...just last

No not often...just last night. I told him he was an asshole and that i was going to bed. Haven't talked to him since other than a few text messages of him asking me if i was not talking to him or busy at work...my reply was "a little of both"

It is just so

It is just so exhausting.....My son is 11 and daughter is 4. My SS is 5 and SD 7. Still not speaking to DH...He "Doesn't want me to be mad. He is just trying to get me to want to do things as a family with a positive outlook. And if the kids dont behave its ok." That was the latest text...........I am already mad. How do you have a positive outlook when you are being told you don't know how to parent four children......

Pretty sure...I do the laundry, most of the cleaning, cooking, pack lunches, run children to sporting events/practices, getting kids off of the bus, doing homework....and try to keep the kids from killing eachother in the evening until DH is home from work. Oh yeah and i work fulltime during the day....not to mention lately I have been called in to start work at 3am! But I can't take care of four children. I didn't cancel a family vacation or a fun family event because i didn't want to go because of their behavior.

Hon stop dong everything....

Hon stop dong everything.... you only do for your kids, DH can do for his kids... it's really easy..

If he wants to take all 4 to the mall, then go... quickly split up, you walk away with your 2 and you leave him with his...

this is really nothing to get angry about

"if the kids dont behave its

"if the kids dont behave its ok."

your husband is dillusional. if he honestly thinks that's ok, then HE needs to learn how to parent.

If he doesn't want you to be

If he doesn't want you to be mad, maybe he should figure out how to be a good husband and not say such stupid garbage to you.

Going to the cell store because he needs something fixed is not fun family time. Heck, I don't want to go by myself, with my DH or any of my kids. Going on an errand to get something fixed is a chore.

He also needs to learn that just because some things don't bother him doesn't mean they won't bother you. Part of being a good partner is realizing that you partner has different needs and boundaries and working out what will work for you both. To me, it's Not okay if the kids don't behave if we go out. It stresses me out, it makes me anxious and upset and really grumpy. And my kids are pretty darn well behaved. I also know better than to take them somewhere that is going to involve a long wait and not much for them to do. That's setting the kids up for failure and myself for a lot of stress and it's totally pointless.

I would tell him if he wants me to have a positive outlook of doing things as a family, maybe he should suggest family activities, not chores that will be difficult for small ones to sit through. A movie, mini-golf, a trip to the playground, a picnic, a walk or a bike ride.... But him going for the low blow just because you don't want to do what he's asking is a totally crap thing for a partner to do.

Me too! It made my blood

Me too! It made my blood boil. The reason why I ask if this happens often is because I know what kind of men say this kind of crap. And they aren't good ones.

He wanted us all to be

He wanted us all to be together....so sweet of him right?!!!??? :sick:

I have been known to say

I have been known to say quietly to myself "No genetic relation!" when the skids do something stupid or obnoxious. In fact, because I am a horrible role model and person, DD (almost 11) and I sometimes say it to eachother with a high five or fist bump.