Maybe Rock Bottom is coming?
Last night DH, SS and I went to dinner with my sister and her husband. We pulled in to the parking lot of the Mexican Restaurant up the street from our house. The parking lot is small and shared with a McDonalds. We were in our big king cab long bed truck, so there is only ONE place we can park. Pulled in and I see BM sitting in her car two spaces down from to us crying her eyes out. SS was climbing out of the truck and saw her. She was literally 20 feet away from us. There was no way for us to get to where we were going WITHOUT walking right in front of her car. SS looked at her, then looked at me and said "what is she doing?". I don't know buddy. I stood there for a minute to give him the chance to walk over to her if he wanted to, and he didn't. He went on the other side of me, walked between DH and I, and put his arms around our waists. At this point with BM and his relationship, we follow his lead. DH didn't even notice her sitting there, so he had no clue what was going on.
Then... BM text DH a few minutes later. "Did he see me crying in my car". DH says he doesn't know, well did YOU see me crying in my car. Nope.
Then she text me (breaking the silence since I called her out on following DH's work FB page). I replied, Yes, he saw you.
She went on to tell me that she "misses" me, and she knows I am mad at her, please tell SS I am ok. And know that I am not hating on you. I really want to tell you everything so you can understand. Blah blah blah.
There was a little back and forth, but the general idea of my response was this- I don't really care if you hate me, that's isn't my concern. I wouldn't say I am "mad at" you. I just have nothing to say to you anymore. You asked DH "what my problem is" I don't have a problem, I just have nothing to say.
"I understand".
I guess she told DH yesterday that she had her court date for her eviction yesterday and she lost. They "ate her alive". Duh. So she is waiting for the cops to come put the notice on her door. Which will happen any day now, then she has 24 hours to be out. And has no where to go.
Oh well.
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Comments
BM ended up homeless for a
BM ended up homeless for a while. Her mom took her in. Which was a shame because a couple of weeks on the street would of been good for her. Another missed opportunity to learn.
BMs rock bottom was smashing her face in and stabbing someone. She got it together enough to go to rehab, state paid, and now a Credit Dacian program to become a drug counselor. Which is kind of a joke really, but at least it's a step in the right direction. And she lives as a house mom in rehab homes. Has not been able to stay in one home for more than three months. Which is her MO. She's never held one job for more than six months.
Just let her hit rock bottom, which I know you are. Hopefully she rises. But sometimes people just don't.
She said she was using the
She said she was using the free wifi from McDonalds. I'm not sure what she was doing on our side of town, other than she does have a friend that lives kind of near us. But I didn't think that friend was speaking to her anymore.
I don't think she expected us there though. We don't eat out often during the week and she knows that. And we never eat McDonalds. She knows that too.
I spent so much of my early
I spent so much of my early life being ashamed of my parents - but OMG they were never this bad.
And I am proud of the fact that I enabled both of them to rise above where they were.
I'm glad he has you to talk
I'm glad he has you to talk and help him through all this. It's stressful for children to worry about their parents wellbeing all the time. It's time for her to be an adult. If she had any love for that boy she would have taken his lead and not bothered y'all while y'all were having dinner.
I think you're being
I think you're being optimistic here. This is no where near rock bottom for her. Rock bottom means she will walk away from your SS instead of the fake stay that is she doing right now.
BS - she's right. this is
BS - she's right. this is not rock bottom. this will become status quo, and there's no telling how long this will last. but sadly, no she's nowhere near the bottom yet.
poor kid. give him extra hugs from me.
Yeah, you girls are right. I
Yeah, you girls are right. I guess I assume it's her rock bottom because I can't imagine anything worse than being completely homeless and not having my children. Who knows what her rock bottom is, maybe an overdose, maybe even worse?
BS - dumb@$$ hit the point of
BS - dumb@$$ hit the point of being completely homeless and not having her children - 2 1/2 yrs ago. nothing has changed since. this is STILL what her life is. yes, it might take an overdose, but sadly for a lot of addicts even THAT is low enough. it has to happen in their head, like a switch being flipped.