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Never going to get recognition or appreciation

wckdstpmom04's picture

With today's society and the way children are raised, many by single parents or dead beat moms who just use the kids a a paycheck or welfare or social security parents who teach their children absolutely nothing about morals, the difference between right and wrong, how to treat elders, and respect everyone. What's even more sad is that the child and parents do not care. Everyone seems to be so consumed in their own lives that they could careless about others. As long as they get theirs first who care right. This is wrong in my opinion. Two out of the three Step daughters of mine are like this. The youngest is 13 and she is growing up seeing how much of a horrible person her mother is and realizes that they way she has been raised by her is wrong. The other two I'm affraid are older 20 and 21 bother have babies of their own now and are doing to them what their mother's did to them. Using the babies as paychecks. It's sad and pathetic.

As step parents we have to pick up the peices that the parents have dropped during a divorce and what's worse is when the children are in the middle of hatred parents. What's worse is the parents usually can't put their problems aside for the children. So when a step parents come along the children either hate them from the beginning because the other parent tells the children that they don't have to listen or do anything the step parent says. This has been my live for the last 7 years. All I want is the children who are almost basically all grown up have have families of their own that I be my over backwards and sacrificed and loved them when I didn't have to. I was selfless at a young age of 22 and took on three daughters when I began to date their father, with no children of m own. Dealing with the I hate yous, your not my mom, and your a b*tch, and more. Now that the eldest two are 20-22 years old and have babies of their own they hate me, and because of me they don't want their father around theirchildren his grandkids until he leaves or breaks up with me. That's childish that they are acting likethis. How would they feel if their child had a step parents and treated them like this. My husband isnt going to fall forn their crap because we just had a son 7 months ago.

I better get used to the fact that step parents and myself will never get the recognition that we deserve and the thanks for putting up with little devils. All because the parents couldnt continue to be civil or tell the children to respect others no matter who they are. I know now I will never get the apology that I deserve because kids nowadays are to selfish. I just hope that my step children get twice what they have to me when they get older. I hope they get divorced and are miserable and their step kids treat them worse than they did me so they will finally see how hard it is and hurtful and stressful they can be. Here's to hoping and keeping my fingers crossed!!

Comments

askYOURdad's picture

Amen sista...

I am guessing I am close in age with you and deal with the same things. I hold a pretty high position in my company for my age (from working my ass of not dad's country club buddies) and most of my peers have loser kids my age but send money on a whim and bail them out and I'm over here just like "your library card, your fines, do some chores" with my 8 year olds.

askYOURdad's picture

Dup

SecondGeneration's picture

Yup but Id much rather be a step parent that doesnt get a pat on the back, than the bio parent of such self entitled beings.

wckdstpmom04's picture

So all of you who have step kids are telling me that never not even once you wanted your step kids to say thank you and I'm sorry for being such a devil??? No oone out there would like them to say that?? I would love to hear my two oldest step daughters tell me that they are sorry and that I shouldn't have put up with the shit that I did.....but I did because I love their father and I loved them. Anyone want to tell me I'm wrong for feeling that way? That every step parent will never ever hear it. I don't believe you because my biofather was a step dad to my two older half brothers and they respect him more than their biodad. So forgive me for thinking and hoping that some step kids arnt as bad as they should be. I'm hoping my girls will grow up and realize what my two older brothers did about my father, that I was always there no matter what even through the bad times. I thought this was a good chat room to discuss my fears and feelings because I'm a stay at home mom of 2 children under the age of 2 andwith no friends, but I'm not so sure now!!!

wckdstpmom04's picture

Maybe I just care.to much for them to want an apology. Question though, how does one stop caring, oh how my life would be so much simpler not to care anymore, those of you who don't want apologies why not and how do you he to that point in your life where you don't want or care to have one? I would like to get there too I've got two little one at home with me that I need to concentrate on, please help fellow stepparents!!!

wckdstpmom04's picture

No. II have two children my daughter is 2 and my son is 7 months. I also have 13 year old step daughter 20 yr old sd and 22 yr old sd who we don't see at all the 13 yr old is the only one that comes around but she keeps in touch with her older sister who still cause problems by putting her in the middle when she says she's coming to visit us. How do i get the 13 yr t o stop coming around all together so my husband can focus on my children

wckdstpmom04's picture

I'm not understanding whs t your saying...??? I've done for the 20 and 22 yr old? Please rephrase.

wckdstpmom04's picture

I don't understand what SO means. Not into short text, but your advice was good. I should find other ways to be happy than pondering on those kids. What do u mean be for one of us dies???