Told SS About the New Baby
I posted a few weeks ago about finding out about our first baby and how we were going to tell my SS11 (http://www.steptalk.org/node/218856).
Hubby was allll on board with the plan of waiting until I was 12 weeks and we had seen the doctor again (this coming Tuesday) to tell the kiddo. But as soon as we picked him up for the start of our 30 day summer visit this weekend, he was chomping at the bit to tell him. I wanted to make a big deal out of it and have a "Big Bro" gift for him to make it fun for him. Instead my husband just blurted out "So we're having a baby!" and completely blind sided him. SS was sweet about it but you could tell immediately that it was a huge shock and blow to his reality. He's warmed up over the past few days but it's gonna be an adjustment for him. Especially because his mom has been telling him for 2 years now that we are going to forget all about him when we start "popping out babies".
We're giving him plenty of reassurance and he and I had a good conversation about it the other day and he's starting to come up with cute nicknames based off of the names we've picked out so far so it's getting better. I'm sure by the end of the summer it won't phase him at all (of course he'll have to REALLY adjust in January when the baby arrives on scene lol).
But I'm still frustrated with hubby - the other part of the plan was to tell BM pretty soon after we told kiddo so that she would have PLENTY of time to cool her jets before he gets there. She's going to go ape shit - she wants another baby so bad - and she's not good at hiding her crazy from us anymore. She's gonna be nasty about it. We want her to get a majority of it out of her system before he's back at her house. She's still gonna be a brat about it while he's there but hopefully to worst part of the storm will have passed. It's been 5 days since we told the kiddo and every time I ask hubby to bite the bullet and just tell her already, he moans and groans and promises he'll do it later and then gets mad at me for asking later and he still hasn't done it.
I don't need to be the one to do it - he does. It needs to happen for the kiddo's sake. Just frustrated I guess.
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Comments
I don't understand why you
I don't understand why you would volunteer that info to BM especially if you already know how she's going to react to it. She will find out eventually one way or the other so stop stressing yourself out about how it happens. If there's a blow up your DH needs to take care of it. And by that he needs to remind BM that yalls baby is none of her business EVER and not to bring him up. If I were you I would let the kid tell her; she might doubt it for a little while because he is a kid so that might buy you a couple more weeks of peace.
The ONLY thing you can do is
The ONLY thing you can do is continue to see the new baby in a positive way. It doesn't matter if BM goes ape-shit crazy now, tomorrow or next month. She will NOT get it out of her system. The ONLY thing you can do is show by example that you both love SS as well.
The boy is 11, he isn't 5. I am sure his other friends have had additional children born into their families. Don't overthink this.
Sadly this in my case too.
Sadly this in my case too. Complete rejection of my girls and insistence they are not his siblings, step or otherwise. Chucky was convinced once BabyD was born he never had to set foot in our house again.
I believe it was Sane One's
I believe it was Sane One's wacko Kraken BM who, when she found out Sane was preggo with her first, went out and had a ONS baby!!!! I believe that is the mini-Kraken? Also, the BM ran around telling people that Sane's DH was mini's Dad as well!
So beware for a "revenge pregnancy".....just sayin.....