We need to look into this as well...good question.

Gonna ask DH how he would do this now and I'll get back to you!

ETA: Just talked with DH. In the event of his death, I'm 100% beneficiary. In the event of my death, he's 100% beneficiary. I did ask him to be sure my daughter gets a fair share which I have no doubt he'd do. He said if he goes, he is perfectly fine with however I spend his life insurance after his funeral is paid for as long as every weapon (except the .9 mil) goes to his brother. His daughter gets jack shit since she's been so nasty.

I think a trust is a much better route than an actual will.

I have to set this up also. I have life insurance on both myself and DH. I have three bios, on skid and we have one on the way together - his, mine and ours.

I purchased the home that we live in, but it needed lots of work and he is the one doing all the improvements. We have been married less than a year and the home was purchased prior to our getting married. I also own other property.

One thing that I am concerned about is that MY children are taken care of. Another thing that I am concerned about is that BM NOT benefit in anyway from anything that should happen to DH or myself.

My exH is also recently remarried, so .... I also have to be concerned about that, as my initial strategy left a portion of my insurance policy to my ex and a portion to my husband. Now that the ex has a spouse i need another strategy entireley.

I think if the children are over a certain age, then all should go to the spouse to ensure the spouse is taken care of. However if the children are younger, then provisions need to be made to ensure they are taken care of as well.

I'm quite firmly of the opinion that 90-100% goes to the wife (NOT ex).

How old are the SD's though? In my divorce decree I asked that my XH keep a life insurance policy on himself with me as the beneficiary until the youngest turns 18.

Other than possibly money to cover a minor child everything should go to the current wife. If there are specific things, such as Dead Grandpa's old toothbrush, or Grannie's hair brush, they should be listed individually "Janie gets Great-Aunt Judy's typewriter".

Good luck with that though.

Katie

My current will gives 50% of my assets to FDH and the other 50% goes into a trust for my children. I also have two life insurance policies, one has the trust as the beneficiary, the other has both FDH and his kids as beneficiaries.
We are also each others healthcare powers of attorney and agents for making our funeral plans.
These were important to have set up since we are not yet married. We wanted to make sure that if something happened to either of us, the other would be the one making decisions.

edited to add- forgot to say that FDH gets to decide which personal effects are distributed to whom

All of his bios should get something, you should get something too.

Maybe I'm just sensitive about this... my grandfather passed away after he received a large settlement from an accident. My dad's SM took it all- leaving nothing to my dad & aunt (her step-children) or to her own bio-daughter with my grandfather. That is NOT what my grandfather wanted to happen upon his passing... too bad he never set up a trust for his kids.

I have the same family dynamic. Our will is as follows:
1/2 entire estate goes to our DD.
The other 1/2 is divided amongst all 4 children including DD.
Anyone contesting gets nothing.
DDs college to be paid before divisions (she is the only minor)

Our reasoning is skids have a mom to receive an inheritance from (ha!). DD is my only birthed child and should not split my portion of the estate when the skids have a chance to inherit from me, DH and BM.

Technically if DH passes before me I can change my will and give it all to DD. I wouldn'tbut I also have some specific things DD outright inherits that the skids will likely be unhappy with. Things like expensive jewelry my horse his tack and a stipend to care for him.

I think that the home/house should go to the remaining spouse. The spouse should be taken care of first.

I think that each child should be left with momentos or things passed down from the parents previous generations, etc. But not necessarily money.

If one person brought a lot of wealth than that should be divided between the spouse and the children of said person but not necessarily stepkids (their choice).

IMO, minor children should be left more than adult children. If there is alot of wealth adult children should get enough to make it thru 4 years of college at the most.

Minor children should be taken care of FIRST.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

We just have our own individual children with no bios that are "ours".

The house was DH's but I think it should be left to me (if he goes first) because now it is OUR home.

All cash should be left to the remaining spouse.

DH and I have things that we want left to our own children. We both have communicated this to each other.

DH has life insurance on his self some $ to me some $ to SS. I think this is probably equal amounts. ?

I have life insurance on myself one pretty big policy that will go to my children. I have had this policy since my children were minors so I will leave this as it is.

One smaller policy that will go to DH.

This is a topic I have a hard time figuring out. DH is quite a bit older than me, so it stands to reason I will outlive him by many years. When he dies, I think everything since we were married should go to me. Money and property he had before we were married/outside our marriage should be split three ways (SD and our two BDs). But I know he thinks SD should inherit something, and that's where I'm torn. If we pay out to her some portion of the total estate upon his death and then I go on to be in long-term care for years and use up all our remaining assets, our BDs will get nothing and that is not fair to them. If we pay out some amount to each of them upon DH's death and then later I need it and it's not available, that is not fair to me. Don't know what to do.

I know this sounds odd but this is how we have it set up:

I am DH's beneficiary for 75% of his life insurance policy. Each of his kids are 12.5% (2 kids, 25%).

My children are 80% beneficiaries of my life insurance policy. DH gets 20%, which is what I calculated "should" be enough to pay off my house (the only debt I have) and my funeral.

The reason I'm leaving my children so much and DH fairly little is that I was previously widowed so I'm the sole surviving parent of my children. If I were to pass before they turn 18, the money goes to my brother who will basically execute the money for my kids (and take custody of them too).

Most of this I had written up in a will prior to meeting DH. The only thing I changed was the beneficiary amounts on my life insurance to include him sort of.

DH is well aware of how things are split, and is just fine with it. Including the fact that while he's leaving me 75% of his, I'm only leaving him 20% of mine. But then again, he has a lot more debt than I do and he recognizes the fact that since we met, I've been the higher earner in this family.

if my dh passed today he told me to use the life insurance to pay for his funeral and then use the last of it to pay off our house and bills and then if the there is any left I am to use it on me and the three youngest kids. But I think if anything was left I would take it and divided it by all the kids and not give it to them till they were 30 or if they gave me copy of bills for school I would write a check out and mail it to the school but that is the only way I would give to them before they were 30. I would feel bad if I didn't give them anything and only gave it to our kids well that and I don't think there would be much left if it happened anytime soon. (knock on wood it doesn't)