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SS14 does the MOST Annoying thing..HELP

Heathergreener12's picture

SS14 is a TOTAL little bastard and driving me nuts! SS14 will Argue disagree with me OVER everything. Yes teens can be like this BUT SS14 is over the top and mostly just with me. I could say it's hot outside( 95 in the shade) and SS14 will say no it's not. The dog could be Obviously limping and I say he must have hurt his leg and SS14 will say no he did not he looks fine. I could say something "medical" that I know SS14 does not know and he will STILL tell me I'm wrong! If DH and I disagree about something SS14 will come flying out of no where and Aggressively side with DH even if SS14 has NO clue what DH and I were talking about. SS14 just heard us Disagreeing and wants to get involved. 
 

Now SS14 does NOT do this with DH. Only me. I know part he's doing it to try and Irritate me so I pretend to Ignore him or act like I don't care. If I show ANY Irritation to SS14 when he does this it makes SS14 ten times worse! Yes I've mentioned it to DH BUT DH does not feel it's that big of a deal or SS14 just voicing his opinion. Now once or twice it's no big deal but the fact SS14 does this 24/7 is driving me nuts! 

The fact I mostly Ignore him and show NO reaction why does SS14 keep doing this??? 
 

 

I Think I Am's picture

Tell him off! Do you tell him off? Ignoring him is great, I also don't bite over stupid & small things but if that's not working & your DH won't step up, tell SS yourself to stop it & go away. I had to tell my SS's to 'mind their business' constantly when they were younger & always asking 'what are you talking about' it drove me nuts but they thankfully grew out of it.

Winterglow's picture

When he interrupts, smile benevolently, use a kind voice, and say, "the grown ups are talking, wait your turn. " as if he were a not very bright toddler. Put him back in his place as a child without arguing or correcting. Arguing makes him think he's right so take that away from him. 

SteppedOut's picture

This. IMHO, he is kindof trying to assert dominance. Why the hell is your husband allowing him to get involved in your arguments. 

Sounds like he has too much "adult status" and needs to be put back in his place. 

Ki2619's picture

My ss14 and sd12 are both like this but it's over stupid crap. I ask if they are good on underwear or deodorant. Yes.....no they're not. Do you want to grab a sweatshirt for school Bc it's cool out?  Nope. It's everything and they always say no. But then they'll turn around and they text their das that they need underwear or deodorant or sd12 needs pads. I've quit asking them. I've been raising them for two years while we had full custody and bm got to pick and choose when she wanted them. I put my foot down. I wanted a schedule. I was done driving them to school everyday to a school outside of our district   They can rearrange their schedule because I'm not doing it anymore. I don't even really speak to them and do my own thing. My son is 18 and away at college. I'm done parenting these ungrateful rude kids. Their mom and dad can figure it out. 

EveryoneLies's picture

My SS would do this to me as well, but probably not at the frequency you are experiencing. Every time he does this I would ask him if I was acutely talking to him to start with, if not, he can get lost. If my Dh and I are having a passionate discussion (aka argument), no kids are allowed to be present, whatever they need to say, they can freaking wait (in their rooms)

I do absolutely hate SS14's mansplaining though. He knows so little of the things but somehow is very confident of everything :/

 

Dogmom1321's picture

SD used to asked a question that she knew the answer to. I would answer. Then should would agrue "Well I thought..." 

I finally told her to stop asking questions that she apparently knows all of the answers to. Sounds like your SS is a know-it-all too. 

Rags's picture

Time to shut thislittle bastard down hard and constantly when he pulls this shit.  He gets zero say in any conversation between you and your mate. PERIOD!  He immediatley gets told to STFU and go to his room since it is an adult conversation and he is not an adult. Lather..... rinse..... repeat.

If he argues with your about anything, send him to do a research paper on the topic so you do not have to deal with him.  "Since you think  you know everything about it, you will go research the topic and give me a minimum of a 10,000 word paper, either in APA or MLA format, fully referenced, etc.... typed in double spaced entirely gramatically correct format, indented, punctuated, etc, etc, etc...."

Make sure he knows that you will  have the paper reviewed to ensure he wrote it and did not just download it from the internet. he gets to make zero comments on anything until he finished the paper as assighed.  Once he turns in a safifactory product, he gets to comment on that topic and that topic only.

Every argument, he gets to write a 10K word paper on the topic. Over, and over, and over again until he learns to STFU entirrely or speak intelligently and respectfully when in a discussion with you.

My Skid hated this and learned to approach his mom and I respectfully and after learning a bit about the topic he wanted to argue about.    We had some great discussions and debates once we implemented this model.

It was an extension of the 10,000 sentences model we used when he was younger. It was a great model to get him to think, follow through, and perform to his abilities.

Good luck, and enjoy the papers.

Diablo

 

ladybug1974's picture

My step son is a knowit all. he relaly thinks hes so freaking smart and hes not !!!! i say black he says white, i say down he says up, he thinks hes soi smart it drives me nuts