I am at my breaking point
I have a step-daughter and she is horrible. She hits her teachers at school, she doesn't have any friends at school because "my friends think I am mean." She is going to be 4 in a month. I think she is going to be a serial killer when she gets older. She has told me she slams the door on her friends at school on purpose. She has knocked my fiance's glasses off of his head when she is mad.. Just a nightmare. I have asked my fiance to get her some mental health evaluations... I am not sure why he hasn't because she is out of control. Her own grandparents dread watching her. No one wants to be around this child...
I am totally disengaged from her because she is mentally draining to be around. She lies all the time so I do not feel safe being alone with her. I am a teacher and I cannot afford some liar to ruin my career because she has mental health issues. I have caught her trying to steal as well.
How can I tolderate her?? I am already disenaged and I cannot even stand the sight of her. We are about to have a baby of our own and I do not what this child around my baby. She will probably hurt my baby.
I cannot take the stress of having this child near me. I do not want her in my house. I am so disenaged that when she tells me she loves me, I do not respond. I do not give her any love because she is a constant issue and I cannot take it anymore. Whenever I try to vent to my friends about it, they tell me "She is just a kid, how can you treat her like that?" They have no idea.. I have asked them to babysit her for a few hours and then ask me that same question.. I know I am not a monster, I know that this child is the real-life version of the Chucky doll. I feel like I am doing us both a huge service be being disengaged because if I wasn't, she would be having some serious consequences for putting her hands on others, espically her teachers!!
Wow, this is sad - has she
Wow, this is sad - has she been traumatized? Where is her mom? They are both neglecting her by not getting her evaluated - I hope the school calls CPS on them.
I would not stay with a man who neglected his kid and allowed this type of behavior to go unaddressed.
Her mom is around 1/2 the
Her mom is around 1/2 the time and that's the issue. She looks like a drug addict. She's one of those people who walk around in public with no shoes on. Disgusting.
I'm assuming with how they act during the pick and and drop off that their house is a madhouse and who knows what she's exposed to.
This is only going to get
This is only going to get worse and worse. Have you considered what this little girl could do to your baby? That it's only a matter of time before this child gets kicked out of school and dumped on you? That at some point the authorities will be knocking on your door, crawling up your backside and critiquing YOUR parenting and behavior?
It's very sad that this child is so out of control at such a young age. Has she experienced neglect or abuse? Is there a history of addiction or mental illness in the father or mother's families?I
Regardless, her father is failing her, big time. And if he doesn't step up for her, what kind of job do you think he'll do with your baby? Is he just burying his head in the sand, hoping you'll do all the parenting for him? Why would you want to marry such a person?
You need to come up with an exit strategy, so that you and your baby can be safe. And you need to draw a hard boundary to scare your fiance: either he gets his daughter to a child psychiatrist and starts handling his business, or you leave, call CPS, and file for child support.
We have no idea what goes on
We have no idea what goes on at her moms house. Her mom is a slob and looks like a drug addict. I wouldn't be surprised if the child is a drug baby. I've already told him that I don't want his child around my baby and that he needs to be a better parent, get her to the doctor or get out and I'll raise my baby by myself.
I am totally not engaged with his monster of a child. The sight of her makes me want to puke. Everything she does I hate. It sucks that I have to deal with a huge mistake by two people that had no business having a child bc neither one of them are doing this monster any justice. I've told him if he doesn't get her help that she will be in prison and pregnant at 16.
so sad. I'm over it. I'm miserable when this child is around.
Thanks
Thank you all for commenting.
As of now, my fiancé and his ex are going through a nasty custody battle. I almost certain she is a drug addict and I do believe the child is exposed to things she shouldn't be at the house.
I have given my fiancé an ultimatum and he has filled out the paperwork to have her check out. He is going to make a doctors appointment for his child. I am very thankful but that doesn't make me feel better about having her around. I don't want this child to corrupt my baby.
she has a long road to recovery. She obviously has a mental illness. She also wakes up screaming in the middle of the night with night terrors.
Perhaps consider living
Perhaps consider living separate until his daughter is more under control... I wouldn't risk my baby's safety.
They ended up moving in with
They ended up moving in with me so I feel trapped and like my home is invaded.
Tell him to get out until his
Tell him to get out until his kid is actively going to therapy and her behavor profoundly changes.
I don't think that will work.
I don't think that will work.
I feel ya! Except for the
I feel ya! Except for the drug use I am in the same boat. Except bm had her dad buy her a bar (so as to not screw up her low income for benefits and whopping child support checks) and so now she spends all of her time at the bar and when she has a night off she ships her kids off because she needs a break. She calls and yells and belittles my bf because he never calls and talks to his daughter in the 2 week span between his weekends.. so he started to keep track and when it was brought to her attention that their daughter was never with her when he did call she just stopped answering the phone.
Take a stance and keep it. Do NOT back down, for the damn life of you. That is where I went so very wrong and I am severily kicking myself for it now. Now they are both in my home and I recently told him she is no longer welcome. The sight of her.. the sound of her voice.. brings my blood to a constant boil until the moment she leaves. I'm planning to work over Christmas weekend because even though I was heard about not wanting her at my house anymore.. I'm not being listened to. The crappy part about that is than I leave my younger two (g-2 b-1) around her to pick up her nasty habits and then I have to try and break my 2 yr old of baby like obscene behaviors that she as a 2 yr old does not even show.
AHHHHHHHHHHH! I will NEVER date another man who has kids again. If I knew then what I know now.. how my world would be soo much damn different. A little piece of me hates myself for it.