SS18 falling asleep for virtual school
Oh my gosh I need help. I am at my wits end and getting extremely angry about the current situation. It's all I can do to keep from going off on SS18 (I already went off on DH to fix this problem with his son). SS18 has never been a good student and always managed to pass last minute by the skin of his teeth. Now he has started his senior year with virtual schooling and progress reports for all his classes show Fs!!! He is not doing assignnents so he doesn't know the materiel and ends up failing quizes and tests.
DH has had multiple talks with him, told him he would have to quit his job if he gets another F on a progress report. BUT I found out what is going on, SS18 is falling asleep during his schooling. We moved him into the family room near me as I am working from home during COVID and he still falls asleep! Only now I went to his Dad twice today who has to work upstairs in a private office and made him come down to see SS18 sleeping! DH is mad too but doesn't seem to be able to get through to the kid. Nothing is phasing SS18, he isn't failing not because of his job, but because of sleeping and not doing the work. We thought he wouldn't fall asleep in my presence, but he did. DH gently woke him and and told him to finish his school. SS18 claimed he didn't miss anything. I checked our house camaras and found out he had been sleeping for 30 minutes before I noticed. SS18 is a nice respectful kid in general, but I am pissed. Lazy and unmotivated as hell though. He needs a HS diploma so he can get his ass launched on time next spring. I am now very resentful of this kid and my patience and understanding are gone. If it were me I would blast an air horn everytime he fell asleep. I told DH but he doesn't seem to like that idea. I told DH quit making it so damn comfortable for the kid! I thought my presence nearby would be enough discomfort for him but apparantly not.
If he is falling asleep
If he is falling asleep during class perhaps he is staying up too late. Time to shut down the WiFi and turn off the data on his phone at a certain time. If he has a TV in his room time for it to go!
Stick the kid in dad's
Stick the kid in dad's private office. This is not your problem.
He is probably staying up all
He is probably staying up all night. Turn off the wifi and the data on his phone. Also, put him in your husband's office right next to him. I agree with the other posters.
This is a kid who doesn't
This is a kid who doesn't want to launch so is avoiding school and growing up. DH needs to tell him that if he tanks his senior year, he's out in the Spring anyway. Then let him do what he wants. It's not your job to police an 18-year-old's school work.
thanks everyone! I know how to turn off data on his phone
I can do that from our providers account. But I have no idea how to shut off wifi when we go to bed, could anyone tell me how you do it? It does seem to be a combination of staying up all night and wanting to avoid school and growing up,
Your internet provider may
Your internet provider may have a way to do it. If not, go oldschool like I used to do back in the day and put a timer on the modem to shut the electricity off to it at a certain time.
Or if you're not tech savvy,
Or if you're not tech savvy, take a picture of the back of your modem so you can see which cables/wires go where, then unplug it and take it into your bedroom each night.
We talk a lot about how to launch skids and children of divorce on this site. And the concept of creating a burning platform is very popular. Your H needs to keep taking away comforts and privileges while increasing expectations. After all, no one in the real world is going to go any easier on this kid than his parents.
FWIW, this new type of remote educating requires a lot more of parents. Kids are used to being in a structured school environment, and not all of them have the self discipline to manage their time effectively. Your H really ought to be engaging more on this issue and checking up on his son.
If it's Failure to Launch, he
If it's Failure to Launch, he'll find another to avoid school if you shut down the wifi at night. Address his anxiety about growing up - insist that he be in therapy, that he be helping around the house, and that he begin paying for his phone, car, etc. At the very least, your DH should stop paying for anything as long as he's making no effort in school.
I can write a book about
I can write a book about virtual stupidity. We teach half face to face and half online. All my classes are synchronous, students sit in class with me (all wearing masks) and there are students on zoom at the same time. All supposedly learn the same thing. Yeah rught....I had a virtual kid fall asleep once, during zoom. I had parents logging on instead of kids and acting all goofy. I have kids upset they were marked absent even though they had valid excuse not showing up for zoom. Alarm didn't go off-particular class was at 1pm. Etc etc etc Dogs barking, cats meowing, one mom was cussing at her boyfriend while kid is trying to listen to the lecture and everyone can hear her. Yeah I heard it all
Just wow! had not idea
it could be that crazy!! Not a good learning environment!