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OMG, SD is sneaking food at my house, this is not going to end well

stepmominhiding's picture

Sd has been known as a food thief at best mothers house. She's devoured her brother's entire birthday cake before he got home from school. She's eaten an entire box of pop tarts, also her brother's because her mom is trying to fatten him up. 

 

Well my kids are in summer sports so i like to buy them these "energy balls" that are mostly protein and nutritious fats. And things if fruits.  These bags come with 10 balls in each bag,  and i bought 3 bags.  My dd13 said she had 3. My dd14 didn't even know i bought them this weekend. I go to make a bag fir each of them for the game today,  and i notice that the is more than half of them missing! That means that at least 15 were eaten, with dd13 only eating 3, sd ate at least 12 of them! These things are SUPER filling.

 

I ended up not making a bag at all for sd. Since she ate more than her fair share of them. 

momjeans's picture

OMG. That’s seriously unhealthy for SD to consume that much protein. 

I agree. Hide the food. 

stepmominhiding's picture

It is! I can't even eat that many in one day if that's all i eat! If i eat 2, it's like a whole meal,  that's how FILLING it is! My for my kids i pack 2 and some grapes and some slices and that's their lunch for the day on game day. 

Major Blunder's picture

We have a lock on our bed room door and hide food of all types from SD 20, she and her pot head friends would wipe us out if we didn't.

Simpleton21's picture

Ugh, yep, definitely skid mentality....gorging all the food and not worrying about the fact that the other permanent residents of the house use that food to eat for an entire week!  I also have a problem with my SD eating anything and everything she possibly can while visiting.  Getting huge portions of food before everyone else has gotten any.  It is really infuriating.  My SO is a major part of the problem also b/c he doesn't see a problem with it and actually encourages her to eat more (at least that is how it seems).  I tried to solve the problem by waiting until after she leaves to go to the grocery and get snacks for the family and only having "healthy" snacks when she is there.  SO just continues to feed her bad habit though.  We had her this past weekend so of course SO had to let her eat whatever her little heart desired and then went and bought a dozen donuts Sunday morning b/c I guess having cereal, eggs, toast, waffles, breakfast burritos and breakfast sandwhiches readily available weren't enough options for his little precious!  

I'll be honest it drives me crazy but I realized that as long as SO and BM cater to her and are okay with her crap eating there is nothing I can do.  I just sit back in disgust as I watch her consume her 3rd donut in one sitting and think "well that saves me the temptation of eating more than I need to!".  I also feel like SD gorges on all the food as a way to show she is more special and can eat whatever she wants b/c I can actually tell my kids "that is enough" or "eating that much of xxx isn't good for you" but not precious little snowflake!  

stepmominhiding's picture

Unfortunately she's with us for a month (minus a weekend) for the summer.  Luckily their sport is almost done for the summer. 

TrueNorth77's picture

OMG, this!

SO just continues to feed her bad habit though.  We had her this past weekend so of course SO had to let her eat whatever her little heart desired and then went and bought a dozen donuts Sunday morning b/c I guess having cereal, eggs, toast, waffles, breakfast burritos and breakfast sandwhiches readily available weren't enough options for his little precious!  

I try to buy somewhat healthy cereal, and SD9 likes oatmeal, so I keep that in the house too. But SD9 wants crap cereal, so my SO will take SD to the store in the morning and buy her whatever cereal she wants, and she then proceeds to take the whole box into the living room with her so she can refill her bowl THREE TIMES. Now she has just eaten 3 times the amount of sugar and crap that one serving has! I've told him that she likes other kinds of cereal and oatmeal, but if he buys crap that's what she's going to pick. Guess when the last time she touched the oatmeal in the cabinet? Like 6 months ago, since before SO started buying this crap. SO says "she doesn't really like to eat the other kinds of cereal, so if I want to buy her Coco puffs, I'll buy her Coco puffs". Ok cool SO, when your daughter contracts childhood diabetes and her teeth are falling out from all the sugar (she had to get teeth pulled already cause they were rotten, and have spacers put in, and she was only 8!), that's on you. At least your "little baby" as he calls her will get what she wants, and that's what important, right? I now just shut my mouth and don't say a word when she's eating her 3rd bowl of Cookie Krisp, even though it's driving me crazy inside. Whatever, not my monkey, not my circus, and he bought the junk cereal, not me.

I did snap on SS12 last night after catching him sneaking an ice cream cone that i had literally just bought an hour before, after he already had a ton of other crap, plus leftover ice cream cake from SD's bday party. Nope, I bought this food, you are not going to just eat however much you want, when you have been told the rules a million times. I'm actually going to sit him down tonight and talk to him about it. I've had enough.  

 

elkclan's picture

I'm not perfect on the healthy food front , far from it (sigh)- but even 'normal' cereals are sooo full of sugar. I refuse to allow even more sugar cereals in the house. My mother let me have ONE box of sugar cereal my entire childhood. When I was about six, I begged and begged until she relented and said "this is it - it's your one box, never again". My brother is 8 years younger than I am - so about 8 years later she went through the same thing with my brother and she let him have his "one box" - I asked for one, too - and she said "Youve already had yours..." from before my brother was even born! 

I have lots of complaints about my mother - but I got no issue with this one. She was right. (And she is a serious sugar addict and a hypocrite on that front, but still right about this.)

thinkthrice's picture

1.  Any place where instruments of work are stored

2.  In with cleaning supplies

3.  In with deodorant, soap, floss

4.  Fruit/Veg Bin

Booboobear's picture

I think Im in LaLaLand today*crazy*  am I this different from everyone?  23 Years a STEPMOM and I never limited the food. Just bought more food if we were out.  If someone asked/asks me if they can have this or that, I say "Please, Help Yourself!- Always free food and drink, If your hungry at this house its your own fault!"  Dinner for 8 kids/plus me and DH was usually a 8X13 casserole with the meat and veggies mixed in, like a lasagna or enchaladas or manicotti or BBQ ribs and Desert in an 8X 13 casserole dish had the fruit mixed in, cakes, cobblers, crisps, whatever we had, leftovers in the fridge were made into soups or stews or casseroles, chilis.  If they did not like the dinner I made, they could always make a PB& J or a bowl of cereal or microwave popcorn or an apple or banana, or whatever they want.      When the skids come over for dinner, I pack up all the leftovers and send them with so SS and DIL can take to work and eat for lunch or put in kids lunchboxes.  The skids/kids are fit and trim.  If something is on sale, I buy the maximum allowed on sale items and use coupons.  When meat is on sale, I buy the family pack and some freezer bags, cut it inhalf with sissors and put in freezer bags in freezer.  I take out an unmarked freezer meat and dont usuallyknow what it is until I defrost it.  The cooked meat pan usually has juices and cooked peices left in it after the dinner so I add warm water and scrape all the flavor bits, put into jar in the refrideg and it is used to flavor mashed potatos, or rice or caseroles or whatever.  The ladies in the neighborhood leave tomatos or potatos or squash from their gardens on my porch and I open my door and add those foods to the dinner too.  I guess I view food differently, everyone needs food.

stepmominhiding's picture

I don't mind the everyday food, but things that are bought for a purpose,  and then i go to put it in their lunch box, and it's almost empty,  when it should have easily last today's game and through next week.  I mean this child REALLY had to have forced herself to eat as much as she did. If she ate 2 one day and 2 the next, i would have been like, oh,  no problem. But in two days this child ate 12 or more peices. That's 6 or 7 servings a day.  On top of eating breakfast, lunch, snack (the snack in addition to the food she snuck)  and dinner. 

stepmominhiding's picture

I don't expect anyone to go hungry,  there is a lot of food,  she ate breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner,  and if she wanted 2 of those in addition to her breakfast lunch snack and dinner i would have been more than happy to lety her have some, but the girl ate more than half of them! 

lorlors's picture

As it sounds like your skids have a normal relationship with food. If we said to SD ‘help yourself to whatever you like’ there would be nothing left. She would gorge herself until she was sick and would be as big as a house.

Shelley2018's picture

Well said, dear BooBooBear! Thank you, booboo for the “sanity-check” I was searching for :) 

MoominMama's picture

I buy enough for the week. Every week. I do not go out and buy more because people want to overeat or are greedy. What a way to encourge obesity and unhealthy unbalanced diet. 

Cover1W's picture

You also may not be dealing with extreme picky eating (ARFID) or kids that were not properly introdeced to foods as younger kids by their parents. It's extremely frustrating and there is no such thing as normal food eating in some homes.

lorlors's picture

It sounds like we have the same stepdaughter. Mine ate a whole loaf of white bread the other week in a day and a half and lied and lied about it. I confronted her HARD BALL style about it, still said she ‘didn’t realise she had eaten that much’. What so you have amnesia? Total bs. Disgusts me just to think about and look at her. As you have reminded your DH, I reminded mine about who has a pattern for stealing food and lying about it? The phantom that lives in our house?! No, it is SD16.

stepmominhiding's picture

I think we do have the same sd.  Is she just an all around theiving lying manipulator? 

lorlors's picture

She lies even when there isn’t a need to lie, it is ridiculous. She can also be very manipulative in terms of passing information back and forth between our household and BMs. The most common lies are surrounding food and what she has eaten though. I have pretty much totally disengaged from both her and SS17 now. They come in and tell DH and I ‘I did xyz at school’ I purposefully tune out or leave the room. Not my kids, I have no interest in how they are doing at school, they have treated me badly in so many occasions yet they still want a pat on the head from me? Nope, not happening.

MrsZipper's picture

So I guess we are just going to bash on this horrible, fat, lying, stealing SD and ignore the fact that she likely has an eating disorder and is probably depressed or anxious enough to be binge eating her feelings?

Entire birthday cake, entire box of pop tarts, 12 energy balls when most people cant eat more than 2 after eating breakfast, lunch dinner and snacks, a history of sneaking food. Living in a house where she is morbidly obese and everyone else plays sports.

Nah...You guys are right. she sucks and her sneaking food just shows how gluttonous and selfish and deceitful she is and completely glosses over the fact that a mentally healthy person would not compulsively eat an entire birthday cake. I'm sure monitoring and documenting her food intake with cameras and proving what a liar and food thief she is will help a lot! Ok, continue your thread.

Please take this girl to a doctor and a therapist ASAP.

stepmominhiding's picture

I've suggested it to dh,  Dh has suggested it to bm. DJ doesn't have the legal right to make medical decisions.  He is a non-custodial parent. BM refuses and just says that she's fine, she'll put her on weight watchers. She has yet to put her on weight watchers, but i agree, there is more kud an underlying issue than her weight. 

MoominMama's picture

The problem these days is that society is always excusing bad behaviour and bad parenting by suggesting that the child must have depression or a 'disorder'. Get out the labels!! Easier than actually parenting effectively.

The skid has no self control, is greedy and parents are not tackling the issue. Only the beleagured SM is bothered by it. 

The word NO is missing and if used is ignored. Stepkids always seem to have 'problems', most likely caused by parents playimg roles of good guy/bad guy to gain their attention and feel superior over the other parent. The kids become a nightmare. 

lorlors's picture

was moving in with us full time. She is still a little chunky but much, much slimmer than when she was obese living with BM. There was very little we could do when she lived most of the time with BM. We approached BM who said she ‘promoted healthy eating’ when she herself is morbidly obese. How could she even say that with a straight face?!

We are anticipating SD to balloon when she moves back to BMs in a few months and you know what? I don’t care as I’ve tried. If SD wants to be hideous and eat crap all day long then it is up to her. We have spoken to her ad nauseum about healthy eating, if she chooses to be a fat unit like her mother then that is on her.

Gucci's picture

My OSS will eat until he literally pukes. He’s almost 14 and I have to make his plate so that he doesn’t take a giant portion and leave the 5 other people with a little bit. He’s about 240 pounds and plays baseball (but he is NOT athletic). DH is a big guy (350ish) and BWhore is 250ish, so they say he gets the ‘chunky from them.’ Tried to tell DH that obesity isn’t genetic. I’m to the point where he can eat himself right out of baseball. I used to lock our fridge and pantry to keep him from sneaking, but I hardly buy unhealthy shit anymore, so he’s running out of junk to eat. 

lorlors's picture

Otherwise pigdog aka SD16 would munch the lot. No sense of self control whatsoever. I actually quite fancied ordering a Chinese takeout tonight for dinner. I won’t as it is sickening watching her eat at speed so she gets the majority of the food. Who does that when there is plenty to go around?!!!! 

Gucci's picture

It really is terrible how these kids were never taught any better than this. I mentioned to DH one time how I am embarrassed to go out to eat with them because they usualy end up wearing it or their faces are covered with shit, and he was like 'I guess we were just happy that they could feed themselves that we never noticed.' Typical. 

Momof6WI's picture

Sounds like SD12. Ha! My boys here the majority of the time. They don't over snack nor do we have issues with them eating meals, etc. So they have their own snack stash. They are 13 and almost 17. SD is notorious for sneaking snacks into her room. We will find wrappers stashed everywhere. So, we buy only healthy snacks with occasional sugar goodies. Cheeses, fruits, crackers, popcorn, veggies. You wanna eat constantly? You ain't going to eat brownies!

Dogmom1321's picture

SD10 has the worst eating habits. She gorges herself on food. DH will find an entire ice cream tub, roll of cookie dough, bags of candy, etc. up in her room. It's disgusting. She always sneaks it. If we see her, we tell her no food upstairs, or put that back and grab something healthy. But she's a little theif. She's tall for her age I think? 5 foot, but at the doctor they took her BMI and she fell in the "overweight" category for being 106 pounds already.