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Mother's Day - Do you expect anything from skids?

pixielady's picture

Submitted by pixielady on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 4:54pm

Mother's Day is coming up and I wanted to see how many of you get any kind of acknowledgement from the skids, either on Mother's Day or Stepmother's Day the following Sunday (which I think is a poor man's version of Mother's Day, but whatever). I've never heard a peep from skid when we lived in his town or now, though I never expected that he would say anything or that BM or DH would encourage it.

Another question: how many of your DH's recognize BM on Mother's Day, either on their own or with the skids encouragement? How does that make you feel if he does? 

Comments

I love dogs's picture

Submitted by I love dogs on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 5:25pm

I don't expect anything but usually get a card that DH bought for SD to give to me. We don't acknowledge SM's day. I got a really nice card from SD this year for my bday.

DH helps SD buy a card and flowers for BM but probably won't this year unless SD asks.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 5:28pm

Don't expect anything. Don't get anything. I do get bummed, and we always seem to have them on Mother's Day so that's fun.

I am usually the one asking if they did/want to do anything for BM. If they tell me it's handled, I let it go.

Maxwell09's picture

Submitted by Maxwell09 on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 5:42pm

I have a bio and I still don't expect anything Ha! Kids' are self centered. I expect my DH will let me sleep in but he usually lets me do that on Sundays with or without a holiday.

NarcissisticSkids's picture

Submitted by NarcissisticSkids on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 7:51pm

I have NEVER received anything (no card, gift, acknowledgment)from skid for Mother’s Day OR my birthday EVER..and I been in his life for 25 years. Although I text him every year to remind him of Father’s Day, and DH birthday so at least he acknowledges his dad-I have never received anything. My bios make up for the nasty skid, they are very appreciative and loving on Mother’s Day- makes up for the dud.

NarcissisticSkids's picture

Submitted by NarcissisticSkids on Wed, 04/18/2018 - 9:07pm

Yes- I did stop reminding them a couple of years ago..came to my senses, and  I thought to heck with it...Cannot believe I was that stupid!!

sunshinex's picture

Submitted by sunshinex on Thu, 04/19/2018 - 7:21am

My DH never acknowledges BM because she only sees SD two or three times a year. He always acknowledges me and so does SD. This year it’s a sore spot for me because it’s my first one with a baby... 

I hate to say it but I’d rather it be me and the baby so we can celebrate but I’ll have to bring SD along for anything we do. 

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Thu, 04/19/2018 - 7:34am

DH always acknowledges me on Mother's Day, even though I have no bios.

SD usually does not but that does not bother me at all, as I am not her mother. She has occasionally mentioned something to DH if she happens to talk to him that day, like, "Tell hereiam Happy Mother's Day", but that is rare. It is just not an issue, as far as I'm concerned. I don't expect her to think of me on Mother's Day or my birthday.

DH has not acknowledged BM on Mother's Day since they split.

DPW's picture

Submitted by DPW on Thu, 04/19/2018 - 9:08am

I don’t expect anything nor have ever received anything. The reality is that I do not play a parental role in my SS’s lives but really play more of a “dad’s girlfriend” role, which is perfect for me.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Submitted by ProbablyAlready... on Thu, 04/19/2018 - 9:13am

The girls picked some things out for me last year Smile Nothing huge, but made me smile. I had been dreading mother's day for months at that point... BM had been poisoning them and I'd already been hearing about how I'd "never be a mom" and would "never be a real mom." So I figured it was just going to be a day of getting that thrown in my face... Even though I was the one raising and BM (even at the time) was taking them MAYBE one or two days every few weeks and pawning them off onto her family... But I was pleasantly surprised.

We don't do anything for BM anymore... After last years disaster I set that standard with DH... NEVER. again. The girls can make a card if they want, I'll even help, but we're not buying her anything, and the card is only even being done IF the girls ask. But since she abandoned ship 10 months ago, I doubt they will.

momjeans's picture

Submitted by momjeans on Thu, 04/19/2018 - 10:28am

I’ve never received acknowledgement or anything tangible from skid on Mother’s Day. She has a Mom - one Mom, and she has been force fed that from early on. Skid does not have a stepmom or a bonus Mom.

BM is legit THE MOM™, come Mother’s Day. 

With that said, in the early days when we still lived in the same city as BM and skid, DH would take skid to buy something special for mommy. Like a $300 purse “special.” Granted, BM always refused said gifts, and literally threw them back at DH.

The first year of us dating, I witnessed all of this go down, but didn’t say anything. The next year, when he brought up taking skid shopping, I said “Absolutely not!” and “Doesn’t skid make these kind of gifts at school?” 

He always claimed he was doing it for skid. To make her feel good with giving her Mom something. Really? Thankfully, he stopped.

DH has always acknowledged me on Mother’s Day, whether it’s a nice card + homemade cards from our littles and flowers, lunch out, or a gift. 

And even though DH never needs reminding of the holiday, I never remind him to wish his own mother a happy day or to buy her something. She is a toxic and needy twit who has treated me like **just** the second wife who needs to treat skid like she is the most important person in the room and world, while humoring BM that she’s still relevant to them, as in-laws.