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The perfect family...

Pook's picture

Submitted by Pook on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:23pm

I am wondering if anyone had or currently has one of those friends who seems to have the perfect family life. Their kids are also their friends, they seem to always get along, no stress, no fights, etc.

I had a friend that has that type of relationship with her kids. Mind you, they don't seem to have ever had to do any chores and if there were asked to do anything and didn't, it wasn't a big deal. Still, I would see that dynamic and wonder what I was doing wrong.

Has anyone else had that kind of an experience?

Comments

mama_althea's picture

Submitted by mama_althea on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:25pm

Every minute of every day.

FB has made it that much worse, because now I also get to see how much better my far away friends and acquaintances are doing in addition to the ones I see in person.

SMof2Girls's picture

Submitted by SMof2Girls on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:27pm

FB is the ultimate lie. As with any social media, people see what you want them to see.

stormabruin's picture

Submitted by stormabruin on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:34pm

I think it's important to keep in mind that FB only shows us what people want us to see. People post pictures of their wonderful vacations & their happy smiling children. No one takes pictures of whiny crabby kids. No one takes pictures of their house when it's in shambles. No one takes pictures of themselves arguing with their spouse or the crappy car they can't replace because they don't have a job. They don't get on there & cry because they found questionable text messages from an ex. They don't post status updates when they discover their spouse cheated.

FB is deceptive. Even while it brings so many people together, it only shows a very small part of reality. People pick & choose what they share, & the majority of the time, they only share what will make their lives appear to be great to others.

stormabruin's picture

Submitted by stormabruin on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:51pm

Well, yeah. Our BM is the same way. I guess there are exceptions to every rule. LOL!

SMof2Girls's picture

Submitted by SMof2Girls on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:56pm

I think any person with a shred of self respect or dignity would prefer to keep their "dirty laundry" OFF the one place every person they know could see it.

But ya know, these BM's .. they're just a whole different breed.

SMof2Girls's picture

Submitted by SMof2Girls on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:26pm

A girl I went to high school is a stay at home mom to 4 kids. They have a beautiful house, her husband is great, kids are all well-behaved. She looks like a freaking supermodel and her house is spotless.

Granted, this is a very limited view as I don't spend a TON of time with her, but I totally get what you're saying.

karenemoy's picture

Submitted by karenemoy on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:29pm

No one has the perfect family - does not exist. I thought someone I knew did but then her daughter got very ill and now is in a wheelchair.

Every family is disfuntional is some sort of way. Carol Brady was not real.

Pook's picture

Submitted by Pook on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:30pm

I don't see this friend anymore, for different reasons, but any time I would be there, they would all be playing video games and she would be joking with them, and they would be talking to her like she was their friend.

There wasn't any discipline and often the house was a complete pig sty (dirty dishes everywhere) because the kids didn't pick up after themselves, but my friend would yell at them for it, and then tidy up herself, and then they would talk about video games, etc.

To this day, I think of that dynamic and think "really? Was that better or not?"

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:32pm

I am blessed that me and most of my "real" friends have great lives. NOT PERFECT...those are only on FB.

mama_althea's picture

Submitted by mama_althea on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:38pm

The family of my son's best friend and that we see often at church/functions seems so perfect. They like each other, they hang out together, their home is nice but not like a museum, the kids are well-behaved and nice to be around, the kids follow rules and get good grades, they all do charitable work, they live pretty "green", eat healthy...

I truly hope their lives are as idyllic as they seem.

But I totally wonder how they managed this. My home just feels like a strife magnet, so I can't help but wonder if it's me...

Peaches1973's picture

Submitted by Peaches1973 on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 2:46pm

Well no one is perfect,no person and no family.Every dynamic has its own issues.Some you can see on the surface and some are well and easily hidden.
Everyone has their own crosses to bear,there are just alot of people who are much more private about their issues than some.

When I see someone whos life seems to be so much smoother than mine I just tell myself that eveything isnt always as it seems,that way I dont beat myself up trying to live up to impossible standards and expectations.

As far as your friend never expecting her kids to do chores or have responsibilities-of course those kids are happy! Mine would be happy as pigs in shit too given that choice! Wink

Lost n Hopeless's picture

Submitted by Lost n Hopeless on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 4:07pm

I love that comment "Friends don't let friends become stepparent"! Very true! I'm a step parent and it's freaking hard!! I'm at the point where I don't know what to do anymore! Any advice on keeping a "step family" together for 30 years?? Cuz I need some!!!

Frustr8d1's picture

Submitted by Frustr8d1 on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 4:10pm

I love the comment too---LESSON LEARNED for my next life!