Obnoxious things they say
My SS4 (will be 5 in a few months) has lately been saying things where I'm pretty sure his sole purpose is to try to get a rise out of me. Should I respond or just ignore?
Example, last night SS4 was sitting at the table while I was washing dishes. He complained about something obnoxious, and I can't even remember how the whole exchange went down, but it ended with him saying "I wish I was at my mom's house."
He also loooves to say how things are done at his mom's house. "I don't have to eat vegetables at my mom's house." "I don't have to brush teeth at my mom's house." "I get to watch TV all day long at my mom's house." Last night he complained that his dad made him corn dogs in the oven versus the microwave. Announced he would not eat them unless they were made in the microwave like at his mom's house.
UGH. I think he knows I hate that kind of talk. His dad does too. What should we do about it? Can we address it directly (the old, "we're not at your mom's house" thing has no effect) or just ignore? I've mostly been using the ignore, hoping that the comments would decrease, and they haven't.
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I say "this is not your moms
I say "this is not your moms house this is dads house. we do things differently."
I have gotten pretty quick and when she starts to talk about her moms house I say whos house are you in, and how does daddy do things. My FSD3 and FSD5 know what they are doing and that it hurts there dads feelings, especially because there mother took off and hasn't spoken to the girls in over a month. The girls' shrink told us that it is okay to correct our girls because they are testing limits and pushing the boundaries. He wants them to face the reality of the situation and realize that every home is different and everyone has different rules
LOL! Trust me, that is the
LOL! Trust me, that is the 1st thing that popped into my head. I wanted to go "Me too, kid." But I kept my mouth shut, thank God.
If I were you I would just
If I were you I would just ignore the comments and try to not listen to him when he gets in that mode. I literally have learned to distract myself when comments are being thrown out there. It protects your sanity and eventually he will realize you are consistent and not into the drama. I know it's hard and can be frustrating.
Oh, no DH is pretty firm on
Oh, no DH is pretty firm on that sort of thing. SS4 got the whole "Hm, that's too bad. It's a long time til morning" from both of us. He ate the corndogs without complaint after that.
He's 4. I bet his mom hears
He's 4.
I bet his mom hears the same stuff about you and dad.
If he's in preschool, I bet his teacher hears it as well.LOL
I am going through the same
I am going through the same thing... I cant stand my SS's mother. She is a selfish hateful person who allows him to get away with everything just to annoy us because she knows we have rules here. SS(4) always says " im going to tell my Mom" or my other mom lets me. Super irritating and it is extremely stressful. But to be quite honest i am in the same boat you are i dont know where to go with it either, i just want to go in the room and cry because it is so stressful. if you come up with anything that may work, tips would be appreciated. :?
Kind of cute that he says
Kind of cute that he says "other mom." That is a level of recognition of you as a parent that most of us smoms don't get. Silver lining, right?
I sort of enjoy ignoring his comments completely, like he didn't even say anything. But for some reason that "I wish I was at my mom's" comment really got under my skin.
My SS4's mother is really not a parent. She provides a roof over his head (most of the time), clothing (it might not fit and it might have holes in it, but hey it's clothing), and food (not at set mealtimes, naturally, just whatever he pulls out of the fridge). Zero structure, no limit on TV/video game time, no writing/drawing/reading time, no bedtime, etc. So SS4 goes from that environment to ours, and yeah I guess no wonder he can be kind of bratty about it.
I know that SD use to do this
I know that SD use to do this sort of stuff. She hasn't in a long time though, or maybe she does, I'm not sure as she hasn't been to my home in a while, but when she did SO would either say "Well we aren't at mom's house" or "Things are different when you are with daddy". She use to scream and cry "I want my moooooommmmmmmyyyyyyy" when she wasn't getting her way, SO would simply say "You will see mommy in x number of hours" or he'd say "fine, I'll take you home", that would usually get a response of "Nooooooooo, I want to stay with youuuuuuuuuuuuu!".