A little History.........
I'm new to the whole "blog" concept,so..........
I met my SO 5 1/2 years ago. He was divorced I have a son 12 yr, he has a son 11yr and we have a son 1 yr. It's all mud puddles and camo at my house!
In the beginning, we were very slow to introduce our children. We were both very cautious in this area. Initially, everything was great. The boys, then 6 and 7, seemed to get along well and things were amendable with BM. In fact, the first birthday for SS that I was around to celebrate (#7), we all (our family and BM family) enjoyed together. The same thing for SS's 8th birthday. During pick up and drop off BM and I would even engage in casual conversation.
At this time, the PP gave my SO visits about 36% of the time - a little more than EOW. Child support was set at $100 a mo, period, nothing else. However, BM was giving ss to SO 50% of the time, Friday to Friday EO week. In exchange, SO agreed to pay 50% of the daycare expenses in liu of the $100 child support obligation as requested by BM. This was about $250/mo.
Then, one a day about a year later, BAM - no more, back to parenting plan. No warning, no reason. So we thought...... Two weeks later we were slapped with a child support modification and a back child support order for $5000! See, SO was paying the daycare directly as opposed to writing the check to BM all of these months. BM's savvy attorney apparently advised her to pull the 50/50 she was giving us as she makes significantly more money and if the 50/50 were to continue she would have had to pay SO child support. BM advised support enforcement that she had not received her $100 check. We appealed the decision to order back support and provided the payments to daycare. Too bad, gift to BM. In order to have those payments count SO would have had to pay the daycare payment directly to BM. What a snake!
At the same time, BM decides to put SS into counseling. Shortly thereafter, we learn that BM's husband has been emotionally and physically abusive to ss. Such that the counselor reported things to CPS.
And the saga continues.........
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Fight it, fight it, fight it.
Fight it, fight it, fight it.
DH was a dumb butt too and did almost the same thing. He was getting almost 50 time AND paying court ordered CS. (only way BM let him see him so much). Then…bam!!!! BM says he MUST go by CO for visitation and a few weeks later he get a notice from the AG about arrears in the amount of $20000.
They had meeting at the AG and DH took a brief case full of old checks and receipts. The AG told him that it was considered a gift, but if it went to court, most judges would rule it as CS. They are not stupid and they know that the NCP is not going to gift that much to someone. BM backed down pretty quick and it never got to court. But she was so mad, DH never got his 50/50 back.