MIL wtf are they thinking?????
I dont understand why some MIL think its ok to chat up the ex. In my situtation my SO and his ex havent been a couple in over 12 yrs, they split up due to her cheating, blowing every guy in the neighborhood for coke. She abandoned SD12 with SO when SD was not even a year old yet so she could travel and party. I was just informed by my SIL, who is like a sister to me and she said her mother (my MIL) called out of the blue and said "let me tell you what BM said, she said SD12 told her she doesnt like coming to SO and my house for visits cause it boring" First of all, how odd cause thats EXACTLY what SD12 told me and SO about her mothers home, and when her mother tries to call her, SD12 silences her phone cause she doesnt want to talk to her. BM hasnt seen her daughter in months. She picked drugs and partying over her daughter. Anywho back on topic. What my SO and I dont understand is why HIS mother is talking to BM after everything that horrid whore did to not only SO and SD but to SIL and her husband. BM and her then BF broke into SIL's house and stole clothes and a gun from them. Even SIL stood up for us to MIL and told her No, SD12 loves going to visit her Dad and SM, she is always begging to come back. For those that have read my other blog, SD12 is living with her mothers aunt, which would be her great aunt if Im not mistaken? :? Im so temped to call MIL and ask her wtf is her issue with calling us with things like this instead of trying to gossip like a child. But I know anything I say to MIL will get back to BM and that will just make me looks bitchy and controlling. But My SO agrees that his mother was DEAD wrong to do this and is planning on calling his drunk mother tonight and confronting her. As far as both of us are concerned, we fell thatthe reason MIL and BM are chatty is because they are both running neck and neck for BAD MOTHER OF THE CENTURY. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this or experance in this that may be helpful to us? Any would be awesome because this site and the people on it have taught me so much and I really value your thoughts and opinions. Thank You 
- Asy's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Oooooooo.... this is tough
Oooooooo.... this is tough one. Sometimes I think MILs (and some FILs!) act this way to the SM because they don't like anyone being their son's #1. My parents are the same way with all the BF's I've ever had. They're garbage until I leave them and then - why did you leave him? And they are onto hating the next one. When My pseudo-MIL and I had a slight falling out she used to enjoy chatting with my SD11's BM because I think she thought it upset me. It didn't. Because before she died, she and BM were ALSO neck and neck for Bad Mother of The Century. Your MIL is being ridiculous and "trashy". Of course, BM is going to feed her full of BS because she thinks she has an ally in MIL. She isn't about to admit that she sucks as a mother. Remember the saying - sticks and stones will break my bones....? Apply it here. They are just words. The BM is a loser and trying to stir the pot. MIL is sucked in and apparently, loves drama? You, your SO and SD12 KNOW the facts. The words these two are uttering are useless, pointless and only muttered to upset you. Remember - you can't EVER control how someone handles themself but you can certainly chose how to handle yourself. You're above this, girl. Way above it.
You are competely right. They
You are competely right. They are just words. My SO and I were just laughing about how his "mother" ( Im using quote marks cause he used them when he said the word and I almost died laughing) who is ALLLLL the way in NY is chatty with BM who is somewhere around there hiding out from the law talk soooo much but yet "mother" doesnt even call him. SO knows his mother and BM are idiots and just keeps telling me that nobody in the whole family listen to either one of them because everyone knows that they LOVE to stir sh!t up and they both would do well with some time in rehab for their MANY habits. Im going to adopt and twist around a saying to play in my head when things like this happen in the future, as we all KNOW they will : }:) Sticks and stones will break my bones, BUT I'D STILL LOVE TO PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE!!!!! }:)
If the skids actually lived
If the skids actually lived with their BM, that would be a different story entirely. Gotta at least *act* friendly to the BM to stay in her graces to get to talk with the kids. You situation is different, though. Seems your MIL is just being a catty b1tch.
My MIL is overly friendly to
My MIL is overly friendly to BM as well. Her excuse is that she doesn't want to cause conflict and risk BM fleeing with SD. MIL insists she doesn't care for BM, yet she chats her up quite frequently. I hate it.