Yeah, this is kinda long...

Last Sunday, my SO and I decide to go out to breakfast with the SD. I asked if he told her about a trip we are planning on Father's Day weekend...we end up telling her. SD and I had a cool idea for my SO for Father's Day. She asks when we will do it. I say we might be back late on Sunday (Father's Day) so we might just have to do it on Monday. She says she wants to see SO ON father's day, so then he starts saying "Well I would really like it if we could be back in town before 8pm so I could pick her up"...he didn't care too much to mention this before...he didn't care our trip was on father's day and that we might not be back in time to get the skid. NOW that she cries about it, he changes his tune. That kinda ticked me off. But whatever, it's supposed to be his day, let him do as he wishes. Problem is... we are travelling with another couple, who are kidless. I've arranged for my kids to be with their grandparents that weekend, and hopefully see their father on sunday! So I really don't care when we get back, but now I have to talk to the other couple about leaving early on sunday.

Anywho...the arrangement between him and the bm is, EOW. So the weekend of our trip is the weekend we don't have the skid, our free weekend. We wouldn't have planned the trip if it was our weekend with the skid. During breakfast, we also told SD about the upcoming weekend, and what we will be doing with all of the kids. There is a big event in town, and a fair, and I said we might go to both. SD says she didn't wanna go to the big event, only the fair. I say I want to go to both. She says again that she doesn't wanna go to the event. SO says we will figure it out when the time comes.

So last night, SO tells me SD wants to go to the event with the bm this weekend. I guess the skid told her mom about our plans of going to the fair, and the skid told my SO "Mommy said if we go to the fair this weekend, we will probably see her and J (her bf)". Oh no....I smell the BS a mile away!!! THEN (I don't know if I'm being paranoid) I think...maybe...possibly...bm filled SD's head with "come with me to the event, and I'm going to the fair anyway" cuz the skid tells my SO over the phone "I really wanna go to the event this weekend". So, she goes from- No, I don't wanna go, directly to - I really wanna go with mommy!!!

This is where the fight breaks out.

After SO tells me this, I say "You know what I think"
SO blurts out,
"I don't care what you think"

Holy fuck did I ever get MAD!!!!

Then he starts saying "I'm not like bm, if my daughter wants to go with her mom, I'm going to let her. I'm not going to say no"

When the FUCK did I say not to let her go??? WHEN???
Lemme take a stab at it...I said that when I said "You know what I think". Apparently "You know what I think" translates to "Don't let her go"

I'm flippin out at this point. I would NEVER tell him to "not let her go". Not my kid. Not my decisions.

So he's running his mouth off, and at this point, I just wanna get away from him. He's pissing me off more and more by going on and on...blah bblah blah...so I tell him
"When did I say NOT to let her go with her mom? I NEVER said that! I don't give a fuck if you don't care what I think, but I'll tell you anyways. I was gonna say that it's funny that the skid went from really not wanting to go to the big event, just the fair, to WANTING to go to the big event with her mom. And I think, it could have something to do with the fact that we told the skid about our trip for Father's Day weekend. The skid told her mom, cuz she tells her mom everything, and now the bm is convincing the skid to go with her THIS weekend, so the EOW thing is flipped, and the weekend of our trip, we will end up having the skid"

Then he starts again with the I'm not like her mom bs, and that he will let the skid do whatever she wants to do, and he won;t tell her no if she wants to go with her mom this weekend.

I'm tired of it. I'm not getting thru his big head. I was NEVER gonna say don't let her go. I was just gonna state my possible scenario of the bm trying to ruin our plans. She's done it before! And she pushes their relationship a lot. Example, the skid had a pen pal in Alberta, and the pen pal sent a gift up to the skid. The skid's teacher had a little in school thing to present the gifts to the skid and her classmates, and the BM made my SO go to the little presentation. Anything that she goes to for the skid, he HAS to be there, or else she FLIPS! He was supposed to work that day, but he had to take time off to go to the little gift presentation. The bm made it sound like a effin graduation ceremony that he was missing! At first he said he couldn't go, cuz he was working, but of course she flipped the eff out, and he caved. Case in point, she is always tryign to get him to be involved in every single little thing, and yes it is father;s day, the weekend our trip falls on, but I know she'll be damned if he misses that day with his daughter, to be with me. (I personally think Father's Day can go either way...time with the kids, or a time for dad to do something for HIMSELF, because he does so much all year)

Ugh. I'm pissed, so I take my kids and go for a ride to get a coffee, and he says he's going home to shower. So I'm drinking my coffee and I'm fed up. I'm thinking about a solution to this problem. He doesn't give a fuck what I think, so why should I give a fuck about what he has to say about the bm and all of her bullshit with their daughter. I decide to wash my hands of it. Att his point, I don't want him in my face, because I'm livid.

He txts me and says "You don't like the way I deal with my daughter, do you?
I say "Just making observations. Do what you want. It's your kid. I just don't like the way you let the bm walk all over you"

He says: I don't really look at it that way. Like I said, if my daughter wants to do something, I'll let her. I don't wanna be like the bm. As for the weekend that we're supposed to be going on the trip, if it falls on the weekend I have her, I'll have my mom or sister watch her. That's all."

Me-"where the fuck did you even hear me say 'don't let her go with her mom this weekend'??? Stop putting words in my mouth. I simply made an observation about bm pulling her shit to ruin our plans. If the skid is with you that weekend, stay. I'll go on the trip anyways. It's father's day anyways. And I concluded that if you don't give a shit about what I think, then I won;t think about your problems with bm and getting equal rights to your daughter. That means I don't wanna hear any BS about what a bitch bm is and how she thinks she's always right when it comes to the skid. It's your kid, you stuck your d*ck in the dumb bitch, therefore it's YOUR problem. Not mine. I wash my hands of that bullsh*t"

Yeah. I was pissed. I get to a point that if I'm pushed, I snap. I was at that point. It was harsh when it came out. Lol I feel kinda bad today.....

Anyway I'm back at my place and he comes over flipping out on what I just told him. He's just yelling at me, and then he starts on the Disney thing, and how he's trying to keep everyone happy about Disney. How he was telling the bm everything I was telling him to tell her (did that just meake sense? lol) and how he was trying to make her happy by giving her as much info as he could about the trip, and trying to be nice so she would let us take the skid. At this point, I know he's frustrated with everything, and I get shit on for everything! He's taking ALL of his anger out on me! He also throws in "I am being as nice as possible with the bm, so maybe one day she will change and see that everything I do is for my daughter"
BAHAHAHA! CHANGE??!?!?! The witch is almost 40. There's NO changing her! She's also a flippin' sociopath to the T!!!

He keeps yelling. I'm sitting there biting my tongue. I don't wanna say anymore, because I know it won't be nice. Blah blah blah, pressing me to talk. Then he blurts out "I bet you're sitting there, happy that we have our own places." FUCKIN RIGHT I AM, I say. (He's a little bitter that I'm not ready to live with him yet. It's been 2 years we've been together. I'm just not ready. that is all) So I take off in my room and shut the door. I need to be alone, so I pop in some good ol Sex and the City, season 2. I didn't hear him leave yet, and I want him OUT. He barges in about 15 minutes later, blah blah blah, you're supposed to be my gf and support me when I need to vent about the bm, you already had it planned that you were going on that trip without me.... I tell him I need my space at the moment, and I don't wanna hear it... this is getting retarded. Finally he goes to the door and he's still yapping from there. I come out of the room, and we get into it again, and he starts fu*ckin mocking me! That flipped my switch and I say "THAT'S IT, I'VE HAD ENOUGH" and go back in my room. He finally left!

I know I wasn't being fair and that just blew up beyond what I thought it was going to be.
I've learned to use "I" statements, and to be respectful when arguing. That flew out the window yesterday.

He says he's giving me my space. Told me that I could "do what I want" with my space and free time. (he thinks I wanna be single...yes, he's insecure)

Whatever. I have a lot of sewing I need to do this weekend. And now, it will get done.