HELP
OK someone please tell me what to do. My SD16, has twice, in the past, snuck out of the house. The last time she went thru her bedroom window and left in a car around 1am. Her dad grounded her for 1 month. I know thats not long enough but what can I do. So Now this morning she texted my daughter and asked her when her and my mother would be home (they went to a dr appt) so she could make sure she was home before they got back. Then to find out she had a guy sleep in her bedroom last night and went out with him this morning. The husband doesn't want to believe it. I told him that he should automatically assume it happened because its happened twice before. Her mother is a deadbeat and when we ask her to take her she said, I have no room. What the hell do I do now!!! Someone please give me some advice. I have already told her father the Ipod touch we bought her for christmas is being taken back and her cell phone is turmed off for goos. I will not reward her for blatenly disregarding the rules. I AM DONE!!!!!!!
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good be don!, put bars up on
good be don!, put bars up on her window (not safe for fire) maybe put an alarm system up in the house so the police will be called if ANY sign of windows or doors are opened after you set it...call the cops and have her arrested for stealing a car next time she takes off with it (if it's in her name, put in under a guardian's name only) and call her bf's parents and let him know next time he is here without permission, you're calling the cops for breaking and entering and filing charges against THEM if he's under 18. turn off the cell phone.
I would love to do all of
I would love to do all of that, but its not just my decison, unfortunatly. If it were, she would be out of my house. She doesnt have a boyfriend, she sleeps with any boy who will show her attention. I have called him and left a message to think about the consisequences of seeing a minor. Sorry if I spelled that wrong. She left in his car not mine. Cell phone is turned off for good, she can get her own when and if she gets a job.
I don't know what to say-I
I don't know what to say-I remember being a teen, I remember sneaking out of my house at that age (and younger)...to go dancing w/my friends..and sneaking back in wee hrs of the morning. We didn't do anything particularly horrible...and yes we'd sneak the car out also.
BUT-it was a safer country to do this then it is here-and unfortnately here everything is so policed/so many laws that somethign as simple as sneaking out could get her in trouble w/the law and start to build a record...which is stupid IMO and is quite normal teenage behavior but that's besides the point.
Asides from grounding a few things not sure what else you can do. Teenagers rebel-rules or not...they dont' care about your rules
they may try to obey some and othertimes they are trying to assert their independence and test authority.
My moms "alarm" was a parrott at the bottom of the staircase haha...if he heard us sneeking down he'd start talking to you then yelling....if he said "hola" you were screwed and better get back to your room quick lol-othertimes he would be fast asleep. No need for bars, alarms, and such. BUT it was a simpler, saner, safer life also.
I too knew people who snuck
I too knew people who snuck out but my own Daughter (17)doesnt do it and I didnt do it. So I have no tolerance for anyone doing that. She is leaving in the middle of the night with boys she just met. She sleeps with anyone who will show her attention and I and others have tried to tell her to respect herself and what could happen if she was out without us knowing where she is. She just doesnt care. She was told the last two times if we cant trust her she needs to live with her mother. Time to follow thru with the threats
We have done all that already
We have done all that already and she stills sneeks out, but thank you for the advice
I like most of HS suggestions
I like most of HS suggestions actually (minus the alarm and GPS) haha. Good post!
Thank you all for your
Thank you all for your advice. Still not sure what to do, I'd like to send her back to her mom. Dad wont deal with any of it. He will yell a little tonight and it will be over tomorrow. But the phone is off for good and she is NOT getting the Ipod touch. She will get presents but not that one. Too expensive for someone with no respect for anyone even herself! Dad called mom but she wont be any help either. Thank you all and I hope you all have a Merry Christmas!!!!
ok so now it gets worse, we
ok so now it gets worse, we found posed naked pic's of her on a memory card, She obvioulsy sent them to her "friends". She calls them friends. Has no steady boyfrined, has many. Her father is no help and leaves it all up to me. I have tried to make him handle it but he just ignores it. I really dont want this responsibility. What do I do??? HELP!!!!!