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Adult skids and Christmas

Nightshade's picture

Submitted by Nightshade on Thu, 12/02/2010 - 6:48pm

Soooo..I get an invite(on Facebook)along with DH,DD,DS, and their significant others for....Christmas dinner at SD30's house...along with her Mom, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles..all of her Mom's family!!!This is the same SD who ignored my mother's funeral and just recently ignored my Dad's surprise 90th Bday party, and hasn't spoken to us since July which is something that seems to happen every year or so...she just stops contact and ignores all invites, etc. So Ladies and Gentlemen, what do you think(I'm not going)..but would just like your opinions..what would you do?????

Comments

Eyes Wide Open's picture

Submitted by Eyes Wide Open on Fri, 12/03/2010 - 10:14am

Ahhhh...StepAside, you are wise beyond your years! :0)

You are exactly right about being in the minority. And, that is exactly how I felt when I was trying to be nice by attending DH's family functions. I hardly ever go anymore. I was always on edge, feeling like the "odd man out". They all have history together, they have family moments, etc. etc.

Just last night DH was giving me crap because I'm not spending the entire day with "his" family on Christmas. Ummmmm...I've never spent the entire day with them....usually a few hours and then I come home to be with MY family and friends! Why would I want to be with the Viet Kong on Christmas when I can be with the "good guys" instead?!

Nightshade's picture

Submitted by Nightshade on Thu, 12/02/2010 - 7:30pm

He also got the invite but didn't want to go either, he said he'd see the grandkids either before or after the holiday...I think maybe if the SD was a different type of person I might not mind the invite but she just wants what she wants and that is HER family around her for the holidays adn doesn't give a shit about anyone's feelings but her own. I feel like...my Mom died only once, my Dad was 90 only once and she purposly missed both events...said she was "ignored" on the night of my mother's death so didn't show and "facebooked" me an hour brfore my dad's party and said "tell him Happy Bday, we're busy" So sorry I didn't kiss her ass(note the sarcasm)

Nightshade's picture

Submitted by Nightshade on Thu, 12/02/2010 - 7:56pm

I don't think you are harsh at all..I was going to wait until the day of..just like she did w/my dad but I just couldn't..you can just press yes or no or maybe and you can also leave a message, like if you wanted to say why you couldn'y go or whatever...I just pressed "NO"

I just can't wrap my head around a 30 yr old that is either really stupid or self -centered(maybe both)to think I(and her father)would want to spend our Christmas with her mom and her mom's family, I get along with them(better than I do with her) and all but still.....

As I sit here and think...2 years ago she blew off my birthday, so at my house a week later, her dad says "did you at least say Happy Birthday to NIghtshade"..she says she will...when she leaves, he asks if she did..of course she didn't so they get into an argument about respect, etc..they don'y speak for a few months, which is how it always is, and then in a while, she invites us to something and we are supposed to forget what happened.....I am just sick of the viscious cycle and I'm done. I told DH that he can see his Grandkids but leave me out of it and NOT when it interferes with our time.

Nightshade's picture

Submitted by Nightshade on Thu, 12/02/2010 - 9:31pm

Thanks for all the comments!! I will not be attending, my kids will not be and DH won't be either. I am just one who says what is on my mind..don't know if that's good or bad but that's me....I'll never talk behind anyone's back...always to the face!! She knows exactly how I feel...did I mention that when she was missing my Mom's funeral, she was asleep in her room AT MY HOUSE!!!! Needless to say, that was the last minute she lived in my house!! DH is on board, he knows that everything I say is true. I have said from the beginning that she was much more of a problem than my kids who were 11 and 12 when we got together..she was 18!!

I guess some would say I am lucky that DH goes along with what I say, but then again, he knew who I was when he married me and that I speak my mind. Thanks again for the advice and comments...Sorry so many of you go through the same thing with skids but I am glad we have this place to vent!!!