Extortion
About a half hour before BM is supposed to drop off SS4 we get a text from her saying "I'm gonna be there in 5 mins. He's hungry, so if you don't come get early I'm going to take him to In and Out (Fast food place)"
BM knows we have a huge problem with what she feeds SS4, and that we do everything we can to protect him from her disgustingly unhealthy diet (she's almost 300lbs) His father is also somewhat over weight. I don't want SS4 to suffer the same fate as his parents did growing up.
Anyways, BF and her get into it for a while. He tells her how screwed up she is to compromise her child's health just so she doesn't have to get out of the car and play with him for a little bit.
She doesn't end up taking him to In and Out, because she knows by now that she's not looking like a good parent... We get SS4, bring him in the house, I have dinner ready.
Me: Ready to eat,SS4?
SS4: uuuuuummmmm.... ok
Me: Are you hungry?
SS4: Just a little bit...
Me: Would you like to eat now? or later?
SS4: Later
I'm a Buddhist... I don't get worked up easy... But I wanted to slap that woman silly...
Ugh.. This woman's main complaints about our house and why we shouldn't be able to keep SS4 full-time is because: we feed him too healthy and challenge him intellectually... Somebody save me...
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BM does the same thing here!
BM does the same thing here! She spends 40$ a day on takeout and complains she has no money. She doesn't cook and apparently it's not because she can't but because she doesn't want to. I on the other hand cook lunch and dinner EOWE for skids and fiancé! I love to cook so I don't mind, I work, cook every night, (except date night) and still do other things. Why can't she find time especially since bm works PT?! I'm not saying I'm a better person or feel like I am, but I do cherish the time we all sit at the table and share our stories. The skids eat in the floor, watching tv at bm house! That's sad and I feel bad for the children. They are the ones that hurt in all of these scenarios.
BM over here doesn't work AT
BM over here doesn't work AT ALL! She has no excuse! They probably eat out about once a day. She considers making box mac and cheese and boiling some hot dogs, cooking...
So sad
So sad
Nope, not the case. She knows
Nope, not the case. She knows we're against him eating fast food. I recommended that she stop by the store and pick up a piece of fruit that would hold him over til dinner over here, but getting out of the car is too much trouble for her. And like I said, the poor kid wasn't even hungry. She just didn't want to wait.
There was another time when
There was another time when she got here early and she texted that SS4 "couldn't wait to see him (bf) and was upset that he wouldn't come down early" BF went out on the balcony and saw SS4 smiling and giggling as he ran around a tree. She just doesn't wanna wait a few minutes, expects everyone to go by HER schedule.
I am a very busy person. But compromising my SS health to make my life easier is not an option. If we're out and about and he gets hungry, I'll stop by a store and pick him up something with some actual nutrients in it. Generally I don't have to though, because I THINK AHEAD and feed him before we leave, or pack a snack.
I make a large batch of scambled eggs, put some in the fridge so I don't have to cook every morning. I just pull those out and toast him a couple pieces of whole wheat bread and he's good to go
It's not like I've never given him something that could be considered "junk food". It's just not a regular thing, and I don't find it that hard to work around our healthy diets.
And again, she doesn't work. She's not single. She really has no excuse. She's just plain lazy.
We have a different problem
We have a different problem with food. BM is a vegetarian and won't have meat in the house. SS12 craves red meat when he is here on our week. It is humorous what he tells us. The kid is so skinny that he needs the protein, but she won't have it in the house.
Yeah, that's not good at all.
Yeah, that's not good at all.
I was a vegetarian for quite awhile till my Doc said "No more!". Some people really need a lot of protein, unfortunately I'm one of them. He eats meat at your house, right?
I've learned to carry water
I've learned to carry water in the car & snacks in my purse, especially on the day I pick them up because they are always starved!!! First statement after "hello" is im hungry! First question is when's dinner? Second question is what for dinner? Third statement is we need a shower?! I have found my skids don't ever get feed enough at their bm house. She even forgets to pack them lunch! And bm has complained to me that "it's a pain in the ass" (her exact words) to make them lunch! Excuse me it takes 5 minutes to make a couple of sandwiches, add a water, fruit, chips, something sweet and done! Not so hard if you aren't selfish.
SD used to pull the opposite
SD used to pull the opposite and try to get more food out of us. DH would pick her up at 7 and get home at 8 and she'd claim BM hadn't fed her. SO of course he would stop and get her fast food. By the time SD was 9 she weighed 105 pounds. My BD is 7 and weighs 49. Food is just another means of control, in my opinion.
Good point Elizabeth! I agree
:? Good point Elizabeth! I agree food can be a means of control especially I think some skids want us to believe that they have been starved to death since the last time you saw them! lol