I have posted before about the situation we have with BM. Long story short, BM was absent for 4 years when skids were young. She came back & told them she was terminal with Stage 4 Hodgkins Lymphoma. Skids wanted to spend her last 8 months with her, so DH let them go. Turned out to be untrue. 6 years later she's a bigger pain in the ass than she's ever been. We know she truly has had cancer. She had it when she & DH were still together. She lied about the severity of it to convince skids to forgive her for leaving & to get them to want to be with her. We have a letter from her lawyer stating that she denied ever having been terminal with Stage 4 Hodgkins Lymphoma. When DH showed SS the letter, SS told DH that BM felt it was none of the lawyers business, so she lied to him.

I have a friend who processes Medicaid claims. She has access to some records & informed me awhile back that BM has notes in her chart stating that she has been treated for stage 1 Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma & is a "pill seeker".

BM posted on her Facebook, yesterday, that she is ill with cancer & is starting chemo Sept 1st. She posted a video of the song she wants played at her funeral, along with song dedications to each of the kids.

She's always been very dramatic & tends to add all kinds of color to a sliver of truth. I'm not sure what to make of this. Her profile is private. She had DH's nephew on her friends list, but between yesterday & this morning she's deleted him from her friends so he can't see what she posts. If this is actually happening, I'm sad for the kids. She won't tell DH about it, I feel certain. I'm also sure that she has told the kids that DH doesn't need to know...that it's none of his business & that the 3 of them can just be there for each other through it all. BM's mother is near them. I'm sure she's consoled them & assured them that she won't let DH take them away should anything happen to BM. DH's is weirded out by it. It's like dejavu for him. I'm not certain how much of it is true. It seems to me that if it's Stage 4, they wouldn't wait until September to start treating it. I haven't experienced cancer, however, so I can't say that for sure. I hate feeling doubtful, but it's something I can't help.

If it's true, I worry about the kids feeling like they can't reach out to DH as a source of support. What if something were to happen to BM? Skids haven't seen DH in over a year. What a difficult adjustment it would be for them to make. They'd probably rather stay with BM's mom than come back to live with us, & at their ages now, I don't know that the courts would give DH the option if BM's mom wanted to keep them.

I don't really know what I should be feeling about it. I was so sad for the kids when we went through this last time. My relationship with DH suffered tremendously because of the depression he experienced. I'm still carry a lot of anger toward BM for that. I'm leery of really letting myself feel for them just because I felt so foolish after what happened the last time.

I'm feeling a bit lost, a little bit sad & unsure. I think really more than any of those, I feel angry for the way BM is handling it with the kids.