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So my husband says he wants a divorce.

sweetthing's picture

Not sure if this is just him throwing it around because mean old me is not sympathetic to his many maladies or his laziness, and how frigging slow he is or my having to practically drag his butt out of bed in the morning & my not having much patience for having to do it. So this morning after my telling him he was wasting time calling for the dog to just go upstairs & get her he tells me I am a b*tch, so I told hime well your an a$$hole. He says he is done & wants a divorce. I just spoke to him to let him know something about BS and he says he is still thinking about it. WTF! Every day is filled with drama generated by him or his ex wife. Yet I am supposed to do everything & have the patience of Job.

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endoftherope's picture

That sounds like my life! Except I am the one saying it. I have ABSOLUTELY HAD IT! Sad

sweetthing's picture

Because we have a three year old & I hate the idea of being ruined financially. If he would put the same effort into our life as he did in convincing me to choose this life it would be a good one.

ChaiLatte's picture

Your blog about him making those insensitive comments about the baby made me very angry. It is absolutely heartbreaking that a man would have this type of attitude towards the beautiful experience of having a child with the person you love. Why on earth is he treating you this way, especially while you are pregnant? Is he that unhappy with himself and the decisions he's made in his life that he feels the need to act out this way towards you? It isn't yours and the babys fault that he has previous children, and committments that take up his time and money. But it seems almost like he's making you and the new baby pay for it anyway. There are couples who cannot have children, and he's treating you and that baby as if the two of you are disposable. Heaven forbid his previous children have to share his attention with a baby. (If I'm confusing you with someone else this is going to be really embarassing) Now he wants to throw around the D word?! The nerve. Threatening divorce when you don't mean it is manipulative and emotionally abusive. Calling your wife names is unacceptable. You must be so unhappy being treated this way. Is there anything in this relationship that makes you want to stay with him? Could matters be improved with therapy?

sweetthing's picture

That blog was 3 years ago about the baby. I have been deleting older blogs. He had a break down the week after our son was born ( making things all about him). We were really luck tohave gotten pregnant with BS as I was told I wouldn't be able to get pregnant after an ectopic pregnancy & due to my age.

His latest thing is to tell me I am fat when he fights with me...hello look in the mirror. I am sorry but I have not lost the babyweight because my life is all about him, his children, whatever bullshit his ex wife & her nasty BFF throw our way & now you tell me I am fat & a b&tch.

sweetthing's picture

He will not go to therapy. He is a medicated bipolar patient & feels that is enough help for him.

ChaiLatte's picture

This man is toxic. Clearly his medication is not enough. This sounds like a very unhealthy situation for you and your son. It doesn't seem like he really has anything to offer you right now as a husband. Why do damaged men feel the need to spread their toxicity by getting women emotionally involved with them?? So selfish. I hope there is some means for you to find relief soon. (((((sweetthing)))))

sweetthing's picture

I am the one who would be financially ruined, he would just be pretty much where he was when I met him. The dummy never seems to think that he would have to pay me CS & 1/3 of daycare & 1/2 med expenses & carry BS's insurance. He would be living in an efficfiancy apt if he were lucky.

Sia's picture

I'm so sorry. It sucks that you are having to go through this all the time. Love ya, and I will post more "over there"...

Colorado Girl's picture

I'm with vicks.

I don't do idle threats. If he wants a divorce, why talk about it? Go do it already.

sweetthing's picture

I agree. I have told him not to throw that out in the heat of an argument or a percieved injustace on his part. My ex did that all the time & I will not listen to that crap.

sweetthing's picture

Thanks CG, I am pretty calm about the whole thing, I think he is just being dramatic. I just wish he would be the man he lead me to believe he was not this big lazy blow hard.

amicrazy's picture

Me and my FH just had this "argument/fight" the other day. Of course it started about BM and her drama and the skids acting like they run our house, and it completely got out of control and blew up into "I just can't do this anymore, I'm done, I'm gone" My response, okay I'll leave... He didn't like that so kept saying it over and over again to get a rise out of me. I swear men are more dramatic than women sometimes!

dguiwh2334's picture

Sweetthing, first I'm sorry your going thru this.. I have not read older posts.. So I don't know the whole history.. But when I read the part "medicated bi-polar" it jumped out, my mom, amongst several mental disablities, is bi-polar, something I've had to deal with, for 20 plus years! And its not easy. I know a lot about it... I've basically been my mothers parent. Its a very serious condition, and gets worse with age... I'd really like to hear more about what's going on, I'd really like to help you out. And I'm in NO WAY judging your husband, so please don't think that... But maybe I can help with things he is saying n doing.. PM me if you prefer Smile *HUGS*