If it's any consolation my son is 4 and I very rarely get any privacy in the bathroom either. It seems to be a boy thing. Just because the little one doesn't WANT to do things for himself doesn't mean that he can't. It might be an idea to make him do it by just refusing. I'm not suggesting that you don't get him food etc. but we make my son take off his own shirt (or to at least give it a darned good try) when it's his bathtime by waiting him out, usually he will do it just because he wants to get in the bath so much. Encouragement works wonders here "You're such a big boy, I know you can do it, yup now you just need to pull that arm out of the sleeve" etc and lots of claps etc when he manages to get it done, especially at first.

Same as clearing dishes from the table (plastic plates etc for breakfast, nothing heavy or breakable) we offer something he wants and let him know that he needs to do that task first. We of course he helped me at first then we gradually changed the balance and now he automatically gets up and clears the breakfast dishes in the morning. Now we're going through the process of teaching him to make his bed. It's all a process.

I get the kissing on the mouth thing, I find it a bit icky too, is it something that he sees you and hubby doing often? (Which i think is a good thing btw) That could be why he thinks that he can do it to, if my BS sees DP and I hugging he immediately wants to join in and so we have family cuddles perhaps gently guiding him to kiss you on the cheek might work? I point to my cheek and say "give me a kiss" over and over to my LO, and in return I give him kisses etc. We still occasionally do mouth kisses but he's stopped trying to open his mouth while kissing me which is a GOOD thing!

At 4 I'm not sure that "talking" is going to do much good, it doesn't really seem to sink in. I wouldn't punish the LO for showing you affection, after all you want him to form a bond with you, but showing him a more acceptable way to show affection might help.

It's hard to separate the child from the parent sometimes, and it probably doesn't help that you've been here and done this before and so it must feel a little like you're starting all over again!!

I think it is a phase that they go through, my LO used to be in daycare while I worked and I'd drop him off every day and he wouldn't even look back, he was so glad to be with his friends (used to absolutely break my heart!!) then all of the sudden he just DIDN'T want me to go! He started crying and begging me to take him home - same centre, same people, same carers (which broke my heart again!) then he snapped out of it one day and was happy as larry again. He still gets times when he's moody and clingy and nobody but Mum will do but he's generally a pretty happy camper.

I gotta say that boys are usually more lovey and clingy then girls. My nephew, who I used to watch for his mom, would follow me every where. If he went to do anything else he would come running back every five minutes to give me a hug.
I would suggest you make sure that when your Dh comes home, you go do something for yourself, even if its a hour long bath or walk. It helps alot to be alone! Also try to find something he's into that will steal his attention. There are some awesome free online games that help to teach children how to read and write. Uptoten.com is a good one my Sd loves! That way you both can have some personal time. Teaching him to be able to be alone is a very important lesson.
Good luck!