We work in a weird way... We're both independent people! Which I think can be an issue sometimes... On one hand neither of us have to babysit the other to get things done, so we're SUPER productive a lot of the time... On the other, when we have differing viewpoints we butt heads... HARDCORE.

We like doing stuff together Holding hands is a yes! We normally try and get stuff done together, it's more enjoyable, big decisions and decisions regarding the kids we run by each other. We find that helps us stay on the same page, and since I've gotten him to do that he's stopped offering money to "help people" because he runs it by me and I get him to realize we don't actually have an extra penny, period.

We keep our finances separate right now, I've made it VERY clear that until he gets all they ex's s*** loans and crap figured out I won't be combining accounts with him and letting her destroy my credit as well. That's on him, after that we'll combine, but for now it's me and as the primary earner I have primary control over finances.

We do just about everything together and don't have a lot of social activities separate from each other.

We like doing the same things.. so we fit well.

Also, between our work schedules, doing much outside of work is hard (I work 9-10 hour days..and he works out of town more than half the year)

I guess our long absences means that we cherish our time together even more.

We work very well together
Children:ss12 ss6. He runs most things by me largely bc both BMs are cray/neglectful
Finances separate(he-cs me-student loans) household-he pays half of bills/mprtgage/food in cash to me and I pay all when due+ buy food
He cooks! Washes dishes
I clean!(skids clen after themselves mostly we both do laundry)
Big jobs we tackle together
He takes care of Skids when here(diapers etc.)
We have house rules and I can and do discipline as does he(he sees less bc he is more used to the kids...)
He fixes stuff around the house (i buy parts as I handle the emergency budget)
All of these things we agreed on Before getting married(that is KEY). He also moved in with ME(also key when I say" he!! No Skids do not destroy my house!")

Oh man, that's a tough question to answer. I feel like we are a 50/50 split on independent and inseparable.

Our finances are partially combined. We have a joint savings account, but separate checking and savings. We are each responsible for a certain set of bills. We spend money and rectify it monthly. It gives us each freedom to buy lunch or a splurge without getting harped on every time a dime is spent. So far, this works.

DH is a homebody whereas I go nuts staring at walls. Usually on weekends we don't have the kids, we're inseparable. On weekends we do, I go off to do my thing and he generally stays in (the kids are homebodies, too). It's an ebb and flow thing, but I'd really say we are fairly 50/50 on time spent together.

As far as neediness, we are each needy in our own way. DH likes being in proximity to me whereas I like physical touch. It used to annoy the crap out of him until I told him that was MY way of being needy whereas his was needing me nearby. He got over it...mostly.

We do try to talk a lot, and we call each other on our crap. We don't get into very many fights, but we do get into long-winded discussions. I can be bad at listening, and he can be bad at holding double standards. We both are fiery tempered, so we know that if we trigger one another that we need to back away for a while.

I'm not saying everything is sunshine and rainbows. We both have quirks that drive the other crazy. We both do try to meet the other halfway and try to practice mindfulness of our actions. We also actively deploy disengagement in many areas, not just with the kids. If there is something I feel TRULY strongly on and he doesn't, he just let's it go. I do the same.

We are a mix of everything.

We do pass most everything past each other. This includes any decisions he makes about the SS's. He is not asking my approval, just my opinion.

We share finances but do have separate finances as well such as savings and credit cards.

We do most things together but I have more of an active independent social life than he does. If him and I are not together doing something it is usually because he has something to do with the boys. I spend one night a week with my girlfriends doing different things and one night a week with my mom. We meet up at the end of the day and catch up before bed.

Weekends we do afternoon things around the house, with the boys, sports and at night its him and I for cocktails in the kitchen.

He tells me all the time that he doesn't want to spend his time with anyone but me, but when we are out and about he is his usually chatty Sagittarius self. He makes friends everywhere.

Our finances are combined. However we generally run large purchases past each other before doing it. Which is why I used to get so pissed when DH would be all secretive about shit he was buying SD. Any other time, we're open books, so why the sneaky shit? We both do things with friends, but usually hobby related.. so like I run 5Ks and show and judge at horse shows, DH hunts. DH does not come to my races or horse shows and I do not tag along hunting. Neither one of us does the bar scene.

I really try to help DH out with stupid crap like bringing in wood for the fire place, because I know he hates doing it and mowing the garden, because it has to be done with the push mower. And in turn he'll help me by dumping the horse manure cart, and fixing horse fence when it's down. I was a bitch though about SD and NEVER offered to help out where she was concerned, and I know that aggravated DH.

My marriage does not work. That is why I am ending it.

I refuse to live with a person who has low standards for himself and his children, takes no responsibility for the state of his life, blames me for what is wrong with our marriage.
My own self-respect does not permit me to live with someone I have no respect for.

I think it's constantly evolving. And if both parties don't also evolve (like with my ex) then that's where problems could occur, even if everything else was great. Your questions are good.

Are you a couple that do everything together, run everything by each other, share finances?
We try to do as much together as possible. DH needs companionship and loves spending time together. I really appreciate this as I need it less but I do make sure he gets attention from me on a regular basis. :O He makes time for the two of us and asks when he needs it. We run things by each other for the most part, and I also appreciate his input. What we don't run by each other is things pertaining to the SDs. I request that he makes sure I'm aware of plans he makes with them that effect my routine or plans or to let me know where they are, esp. if he isn't there for some reason. I will not share finances with him until his IRS debt and CC is paid down and as long as he has SDs. I disagree with some of his purchasing decisions and my funds will not support that if I don't have input.

Are you both independent and do your own thing and then meet up in the middle?
I am more like this. I've always been independent and love my alone time. I do my own thing a lot, but try to make sure DH is involved as much as possible. I.E. I'll spend hours on home repair and fixing things up but I'll involve him in decisions and in the final decor or something. DH knows I need alone time now and then (commuting, work, and home is all around people and I rarely have even an hour alone which drives me mad sometimes) and will help me get it. Like I help make sure he feels loved in his way.

Are one of you needy, reliant on the other without much of a social life outside of the your partner?
DH doesn't have much of a social life, but he's working on it. He tends to hole up and get lazy about meeting up with people, or getting to know new people. But he recently went to a work event and had a good time (yay!). I'm usually getting together with friends every other week or so for an afternoon or a night out or something - I love my friends too and try to keep up with them even though we live farther away than 5 years ago.

Our finances are combined. We both brought about the same amount of assets to the marriage so it made sense for us. He handles investments (his background); I set up the budget and pay the bills. I don't think we have ever had an argument about money. We always communicate about larger expenses. If he wants to buy a present for his gkids, he asks me what is a good amount. And my answer is that he never goes overboard so whatever he feels is appropriate.

We are retired and spend most of our time together. We like it that way. I have my musical activities that he is not involved in (although he comes to a lot of shows) and he is in some civic activities that I am not a part of. It works for us. We both like to go out and do things but like being home as well.

We have never had a problem in our marriage except for OSD's infiltration, and that is getting much better since I have not seen her in over 2 years.

We aren't married but we a function as if we were. Basically in my mind we could file for the license tomorrow and nothing would change.

When it comes to social life we are both introverts so chilling at home makes us happy. He has a set from friends from his previous job and a few of them will play Xbox together. Sometimes we'll all get together to do something fun like go play air soft though they are more his friends and I'm just the tag along. We have joint friends which consist of alot of other couples near our age with similar interest and beliefs that we get together will up to 3 times a month for whatever. There's one couple in particular that will crash at our house if they are doing anything in our city and we'll hang out for board games at theirs. I also have friends that accept him and he'll tag along if he can when I go to hang out with them. My family is very welcoming of him and my mom will join us about every other week or so for dinner or something of the like. He's reparing his relationship with his mom but she like me and goes through me to arrange stuff.

For money we have two accounts mainly to keep things separate in terms of BM demanding his information for CS but pretty much once it goes in he withdraws it all and gives me a large chunk to cover bills while keeping some cash on himself for whatever. He trust me to just use the money as I need to but I make sure to sit him down each pay check so he is aware of what bills are running and where it's going. We have the ability to access each other's accounts at will. So while the accounts are appart we do money together. It's always Bills first, house hold needs second (food, toiletries,gas), Kids needs first then adult needs (clothing, hair cuts), after that it's pretty much play money and all bets are off lol.

Major decisions are shared and focused towards the children but that's what I want just as much as him so I'm sort of leading that path.

Personally I think we work together with him sort of letting me run things though I don't allow him to just sit by idly.

We share pretty much everything including finances. My husband and I are both not very social but push each other to get out there sometimes. He's a bit more laid-back and relaxed and i'm a bit more wound up. He's a bit lazy and I'm super productive. At the beginning of our relationship, this caused us to butt heads, but now years into it, he's rubbed off on me and i've rubbed off on him for the better. We're both able to be motivated without putting too much pressure on ourselves. It's really nice.

I'm a bigger spender and he's a bigger saver, which works fine because I make more so he doesn't really mind that I spend more. But I encourage him to spend on himself because I want us to feel like it's 'our' money. He grew up poor so he gets anxious about spending so he loves that I push him to enjoy himself. I like to think we're perfect for one another because we really balance each other out.

I always tell my friends to marry someone who makes them laugh really, really hard because at the end of the day, laughter has kept our marriage AND our friendship strong and I honestly believe it'll keep us going forever. We have the same stupid sense of humour and most of the time, we're laughing so hard it's difficult to breath

We have been married awhile. Almost 20 years...WOW that's a lot seeing it print.

We are much like number 1. Are you a couple that do everything together, run everything by each other, share finances?

YES.

from the day we met 10 years ago, dh and i have been like an old married couple. we're both antisocial, and thoroughly enjoy each other's company as best friends. if i'm not at work, we're together. due to his health, we don't go very many places, but occasionally enjoy a dinner out, hitting up a salvage store or flea market, or even just grocery shopping.

we share finances and have since the very beginning. we live paycheck to paycheck, but we always agree on the big things. even small things we'll run past each other - not for permission, but out of courtesy and teamwork (unless it's a surprise, of course!!!)

neither one of us are needy, but we have no social life - that's just the way we are. i get my social needs filled at work (i love the girls here!) but outside of working hours? meh, i'd rather just hang out with my hubby. he spends most of the day alone, so evenings and weekends he'd rather just chill with me.

We are a number 1, though legally our finances are separate. (Fully separate accounts, joint account only for utilities, we each pay specific bills. Pre-nup specifying the separation due to family businesses on both sides & the stepkids.)

We each have our own thing that we do occasionally, but we are both introverts and enjoy just being together.

We are a complete partnership.
We have a company that we run together and our finances are all together. Because of the business we both know exactly what’s being spent where. We always talk over big expenses and things we’re willing to do to help any of the kids out. We’ve always been in complete agreement when it comes to spending on our kids.
I have a separate savings account because of my last marriage.
I don’t need it now but it gave me comfort when we were starting out. Now it’s just an emergency fund.

DH does all the labor for our company and I do the books. I used to have a full time job as well but was laid off about 2.5 years ago. We found that we were ok without me going back to full time work. We’ve invested well and are on track for full retirement. I can and will go back to full time work if anything goes sideways.

So he’s out of the house most days and I’m home. I’ve become a typical housewife. I cook, clean, decorate, lunch with the ladies, yoga, craft classes. I must admit, I love it but was feeling guilty.
DH said he likes it too. He likes coming home to a clean house and a hot meal and not feeling guilty about helping with household chores, which he never did.
If I was tired from working all week his answer was get pizza or Chinese, so that I wouldn’t have to cook or have any dishes to clean up. Haha.

We typically go out once or twice a month with friends for drinks and wings. With the new house we’ve had a few dinner parties. I like that more than he does but we both enjoy time spent with family and friends.
We have lots of the same interests, travel, food, golf, gardening, and we can talk for hours about anything and everything.
We also have separate interests. I dive, do lots of crafts, love cooking. I’m much more interested in gardening and he’s much more interested in golf.
He takes weeklong golf trips with his buddies and I do girls weeks with my friends in Mexico.

We are both dependent and independent if that makes sense?
I could live without him, but I don’t want to.

We have opposing work schedules (he works nights but longer shifts so not every night), and he works ever other weekends.

So our time together is limited to every other weekend and few nights a week.

Since our time together is limited we cherish every moment of it. We occasionally like to stay home but mostly we are out and about type of people, we go to museums, symphony, movies, shows, nature parks, gym, pool etc etc we don’t sit around and we LOVE each other’s company.

On the weekends when DH works and has to sleep in between I do my own things: go out with my girlfriends and pursue my hobbies. When I am at work DH pursues his hobby (it’s somethung he doesn’t have to leave the house for) and he goes to gym. I am more social than DH and he doesn’t see friends as often as I do

We split chores and due to work schedule conflicts he is home more so he does more chores than me. But I am a clean freak so I sometimes have to clean after he already cleaned. Lol When we can and are both home we do chores together. Last night we did laundry together and then watched TV. I was too tired from a work week. We also spend time with my family as they are in the area. DH has little family (his parents passed long time ago and the rest live too far)

We keep finances separate for one reason. DH pays alimony to lazy ex. It’s a lot of money. So we feel it’s better not to mix finances. Somehow it feels like the right thing. We married later in life so it’s different.

All our kids: 2 his and one mine are grown and independent and do not live with us. None lives close to us. My DD visits the most often, then YSD. We enjoy when they visit especially at holidays. We like to host. We both get upset when they leave. But we enjoy living kids free too!

We are a great match and we share values and many interests (not all) but we have different personalities. We compliment each other and it works. I am very type A and am the type that doesn’t ever sit down and I need things certain way, I am opposite of easy going and laid back
. Lol my DH is very relaxed easy going laud back person, he is very flexible. We laugh that he slows me down abd I speed him up.

We don’t really argue, we both grew up in households where parents argued and both argued wuth ex spouses so we don’t want to ever live like this. Of course we sometimes disagree as every couple but it’s never a big deal.

We make joint decisions about major purchases like a new car or events such vacations or having party at our house. But we don’t consult on everything. Like we aren’t inflrmjng each other we are buying new pair of shoes or something

Are you a couple that do everything together, run everything by each other, share finances?

We do most things together - we're both very family oriented, so we're both totally 100% chill with staying in with a Disney movie and a pile of kids choming on popcorn. DH will sometimes run out for smokes... he'll ask me... "coming for a ride?" and it's literally, a 5 minute drive there and back. lol

We run most things by each other, not because we need permission, but because we're considerate of each other.

We do not share finances. He gives me cash each week as a "contribution" towards household expenses, and I manage the money.

Are you both independent and do your own thing and then meet up in the middle?

We can just as easily do our own thing, and sometimes, we do... generally, though, we do things together and compromise on them. He will never complain if I want to watch a chick flick, he'll watch it with me, and in return I won't complain if he wants to spend an hour or two playing darts or pool.

Or if he does a solo thing, I will too - he works out in our basement every day, so I spend the time he does that, doing something for me. Lately, it's been painting.

Are one of you needy, reliant on the other without much of a social life outside of the your partner?

We both have a small circle of close friends, and many acquaintances and "friendlies". We go to a few people's house or they come to ours semi-regularly, usually... now and then we will go out somewhere, generally a low key place where there are pool tables so that we can play a few games, and we will run into people we "know" and are "friendly with", but would never invite to our home.

Neither of us feel our social life is lacking, and we would have no issue going out without the other, but we prefer to go out together.