What did S.O. get for Christmas from SD you ask?
Answer: nada jack diddly squat (literally) Keep in mind I said not one thing to him other than "So what did you get"? (Fully expecting it would at least be some little thing or a card from the g-kids. They live out of state and he went up to see them Christmas day).
S.O.'s defensive mode went up: "Nothing....I told them not to get me anything".

Then there were more lies and excuses and blah, blah, blah. :sick:

"I sent her money for a gift instead of buying them gifts". (Honey, you're insulting my intelligence dear, and that p's me off more than anything. Don't p*ss on my leg and tell me it's raining, okay. You sent them money two weeks ago and essentially confessed it was for groceries for them, remember???? And then we went shopping and you BOUGHT THEM GIFTS...REMEMBER? Oh yeah and remember that $500 you spent on the g-kids? Hello? Is anybody home?) :?

"Oh she's going to give me a gift the next time I go up [to see them]". Hmm...didn't you just say you told them not to get you anything?

Yadda, yadda, yadda...

Oi and then he started in on me again about excusing her behavior and giving in,etc. Funny how he deflected and turned it back on me don't you think? lol NOT. (please refer back to my previous blogs for the history)

Honestly, you really would not believe how skewed S.O.'s take is on the whole kit and kaboodle.

Then I took a deep breath and said (not a direct quote): This is the last time I'm going to say this dear. Told him it's time for him to stop coddling her and bailing her out, that he needed to tell her she needs to get a job and stop asking him for $, that it's time he tell her to grow up and take care of herself and the family she made, told him she is an adult pushing 30 (will be 26 in May). Again said "Why is this always about what she wants"? Told him he needs to stop this co-dependent guilt parenting relationship. Told him she manipulates him. Told him, this is it, it's time to make her get off her butt and do what she needs to do.

His view: [direct quote] "She's not an adult, she is a kid who has 3 kids of her own". Said she is "sobbing" on the phone to him all the time because she feels bad/scared/worried about what she said to me (but won't call or write to apologize). Excuse and deny, excuse and deny, excuse and deny.

Me: "I don't care and I'm really am not interested in anymore of the boo-hoo poor me stories. I won't be manipulated again. She knows what she needs to do and she refuses to do it (apologize) and instead manipulates you so you can try and manipulate me. Now then, you are beginning to really upset me and I do not care to be upset so my advice to you would be to drop it, immediately".

He is h*ll bent on making me cave and stated as much for the most part (said he will not give up trying to make me keep giving her a free pass on everything she does that is wrong, basically). :jawdrop: I told him it was not going to happen, period.

Then we moved on to a completely unrelated discussion. At least I did...not sure where his head was at that point.

Never underestimate a person's capacity for denial. Yours, mine, ours, his, hers, theirs....everyone's. lol

good grief charlie brown...

Oh and just for the record, I didn't get anything either. I don't care mind you because I didn't want anything from her. But it strikes me as funny that someone who is supposedly so concerned about her souring of our relationship, would have perhaps made an effort w/a card. Oh yeah that's right...she can't even send her enabling father (my S.O.) a birthday card every year...stupid me, how could I be so foolish?! That's part of how this whole mess started. (See history in my blogs). But, I digress...