A Very Happy New Year. My Prayers have been answered.
I haven't posted in a while, because things went from awful to worse...
... to much, much better.
SO finally kicked SD out of the house. Enough is enough. She couldn't follow one rule the entire time she was here. She's high every day. SO gets a call from SD's school EVERY DAY saying she's absent. She steals, throws tantrums, breaks things. Enough. I felt unsafe and angry and anxious all the time.
He asked her to leave and he changed the lock. Freedom!
Our counselor gave us a good quote: "Addicts don't have relationships, they take hostages." How very true. I felt like a prisoner in my home.
Now, I can leave my purse, keys, phone, etc out in the living room. I can leave my makeup and jewelry in the bathroom. I can leave my bedroom door unlocked. I can leave a pitcher of water in the fridge without having to find it empty and placed back in the fridge later. I don't have to hear screaming, slamming doors, knocking on my bedroom window at 5 am because she can't find her keys. I don't have to worry about the drug dealers she owes money to showing up at my home. I can have guests here without exposing them to her nastiness. I can have my life back. It's like a dream.
I couldn't be happier. This was a long time coming. I'm sitting here with my two sweet dogs having coffee, not worrying about SD showing up and causing problems. Even the dogs are happier. This week of peace and happiness has been needed for a long time.
Happy New Year, everyone! I know mine will be far better than the last one. I hope yours is too.
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Comments
Congrats on getting your
Congrats on getting your happy place back. For what I just read you deserve it. My Mom had to go through that with my 1/2 sister when I was too young to understand but old enough now to know that going through that stuff sucks and takes its toll. Sorry that SD has put you and yours through all that but glade that SO stepped up and opened his eyes to what was happening around you all and made the change that has to be the hardest to do. Enjoy your day and as many as you can in the peaceful house you now have.
Thanks! On the up side, I
Thanks! On the up side, I lost eight pounds. Not sure if it was the stress or not being able to keep tasty food around for fear of it being stolen. Probably a combination of both. Anyway, I'm happy as a lark. Thanks for the support!
So Happy for you, and that is
So Happy for you, and that is such a true statement. I am sure you felt like a hostage in your own home
New Year, New start!
Congrats Trying, and Happy
Congrats Trying, and Happy New Year! I can feel your happiness and relief in your post!
I will tell you a story about
I will tell you a story about a good friend of mine that might make you even HAPPIER that SD is out of the house.
A friend of mine, I will call her Val, has a brother (I'll call him Kenny) who was into hard drugs. One night when Val and her brother still lived with their mom, a guy broke into their house. The guy was a "friend" (dealer) of Kenny's and Kenny owed him money. He was pissed.
The guy couldn't find Kenny and couldn't find anything of value, I guess. So, he decided to rape my friend Val instead to get revenge.
Addicts don't just mess up their own lives.
Wow, that's awful! I must
Wow, that's awful! I must tell you I worried about things like this. For example, SD has an on and off boyfriend who snorts cocaine and does other drugs. He has threatened to harm and kill my SO on a few different occasions. He also strikes me as a violent angry person who is not very smart but hates to be put in his place. We have called the police on him and asked him not to ever come here or we're calling them again.
For months, I worried he would retaliate against us with vandalism or violence for not accepting him into our home. SD loves attention, so she badmouths her dad to her boyfriend (let's just call him entitled little prick). This causes entitled prick to want to show how manly he is by "protecting" SD. Funny thing is, SD goes to SO with stories of how mean her boyfriend was... probably to get attention from SO. BF is really nasty and mean, though. He calls her names, ditches her, etc. Giant stupid asshole.
I was jumpy and nervous for months worrying about this stuff. It seemed like SD's one objective while living here was to get her BF into the house while we were gone. We had to play all kinds of games with her to keep her from knowing where we were. I hated living like that.
I'm sorry for your friend Val. That sort of damage can't be undone.
I can't tell you the weight that has come off of my shoulders over this.