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Wow, Y'all Not Only Did I Survive, FDH Grew Some Balls!!

Triggerfishgal's picture

FDH has finally seen what I have been telling him about FSS8's emotional immaturity, and this weekend he really cracked down on it. I'm soooo proud of him.

Saturday FSS8 had yogurt, cookies, and chips...that was it until 2:30pm. FDH had said maybe we could go to Krispy Kreme that day, until it got later in the day. FSS8 begins whining convo:
FSS8: Dad, you SAID we could go, and I really want to go to KK.
Dad: Well that was before you ate all that junk food earlier. You need real food, so no more junk food today.
FSS8: I don't like it when you talk to me like that. You SAAAAID we could go *starts whining more*. I just don't like it when you talk that way to me.
Dad: Well, I'm sorry you don't like it, but that is what it is, it's bad for you, and you're not having anymore junk food today. So quit whining about it.

Fast forward to around 6pm. I'm about to walk my dog. FSS8's bday is today (monday) but I got him a DVD player we were going to let him open early. We decided to wait til Sunday, since 1) it's closer to his bday and 2) he will argue about bedtime at 9pm otherwise. FSS8 sees present in our room, wrapped up. Naturally asks about it. Dad tells him he has to wait until Sunday morning to open it. Whining ensues:
FSS8: But I really want to open it. I can't stop thinking about wanting to open it. I really can't, Dad. I won't be able to sleep because I'll be awake, thinking about it. (his usual ploy to get FDH to stay in there at night).
Dad: FSS8, I said no. Quit whining. You can wait til tomorrow. Trigger was nice enough to get you a present, you can wait til tomorrow morning to open it.
FSS8: Daaad, I REALLY won't be able to sleep tonight *starts warning tone* because I will have nightmares about not having a birthday ever again. And then I won't be able to sleep, because I won't be able to stop thinking about it.
***I leave to walk dog***

I come back, and FSS8 is pouting on couch, FDH comes to me and says quietly "he's pouting because I had to yell at him to stop whining. He tried telling me it would give him nightmares, and that pissed me off. Then he called his mom, started whining to her, and she told him he could wait til tomorrow morning, so now he's mad at everyone."

I told him I was proud of him for sticking his ground, even though it would have been easier to give in. Next day, little shit opens the DVD player and says "Oh, I thought it would be something I would like..." (I'm not mad, I remember being his age, he thought he would get a cool train set or something like that). FDH gets really pissed, and takes FSS8 to his room, to talk to him about his being ungrateful for the things I have done for him, from setting his room up so he has a place to play, to getting him little presents when I go on roadshows, and now the DVD player. He made FSS8 come out and thank me, then sit in his room for a while alone.

I'm just floored. FDH is really stepping up and finally being a dad!!!

Comments

hardatwork's picture

thats is awesome. congratulations, at least he is starting now and you arent married yet. i hope this is the change that starts the revolution. Smile

purpledaisies's picture

Well I posted but I guess it didn;t get on here oh well, it is awesome and I know it will make a difference in his life!

beebusdriver93's picture

Congrats...but dont let down that wall yet...Dad steps up sometimes here for a week then its back to ground zero. So I will try other things to keep conflict down....as I want to try a rules and consequence chart....ummm we shall see
But good for him....

Triggerfishgal's picture

You are completely right. I think he has stepped forward because the wedding is in 2 weeks, and he wants to make sure that I am not going to get cold feet at the last minute because his FT (Fuck Trophy, term coined by a friend of mine) is an immature, manipulative little asshat.

He has stepped forward in the past, only to regress again, but I think he had an eyeopener this time. He finally sees how much FSS8 whines and manipulates to get his way, and how annoying it is. Hopefully it sticks, but we shall see. Thanks guys!!

Triggerfishgal's picture

You know how people are sooo proud of their kids, their kids are perfect (y'all, none of them are, sorry), and they want to shove everything in your face about them? Just like a trophy they earned. My friend coined kids as "fuck trophies" because it is proof that the parents had sex (we'll go with the usual method of procreation).

If ya go to Wal Mart and see someone with five or six kids, they have a whole cabinet full of fuck trophies.