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Need serious advice, am I doing the right thing?

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Mon, 02/06/2012 - 4:16pm

So dh and I are not legally married. Wow that's the first time I said that out load in a while. We got married in a religious ceremony but not legally. I am the sole caretaker of ss5 and we also have a bd1. So for the past 2 years I've been doing EVERYTHING on my own when it comes to ss5 and I just can't take it anymore! Dh works 12-14 hours a day so it pretty much falls on me.

There's no way I'm giving up my weekends

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Thu, 12/15/2011 - 12:01am

So Im the primary caretaker of ss5. Dh works 12-15hrs a day and bm is a POS mother. BM has him on the weekends. The past four years bm has been in 6 or 7 different relationships with men and women and has moved probably around 7 or 8 times. So dh and I were talking and he goes on how he doesn't want ss5 to go with bm on the weekends anymore because bm lives in the projects and that she's in a homosexual relationship and he doesn't want ss around that. Now I do Everything when it comes to ss5. We also have a bd1.

I hate having to lie

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Wed, 11/16/2011 - 10:25pm

So (I) have SS5 full time and he sees BM on weekends. I said (I ) because dh works alot of overtime. Anyway, ss5 has no school next week for the WHOLE week. So I told dh I'm going out of town to visit family for a couple days next week (lie) and really would like if you got bm on board so she can keep her son for the week. Now if I don't say anything, he would be more than happy for ss5 to be with me all week. I hate to lie, but if I say he has no school he should be with bm, he'll catch a attitude. I have ss all week, every week and need breaks from him!

So if it wasn't done for ss, then it cant be done for BD? WTF!

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Tue, 11/15/2011 - 7:42pm

So my BD is turning 1 in two weeks, an I want to throw a small party/get toghether with family and friends. I talked to dh about my plans, buying a cake, balloons, gifts etc and he catches a bad attitude. Dh just gave me a nonchalant I don't give a fuck attitude, saying "my son didnt have a party when he was one" ! Are u fucking serious! MAYBE it's because your exwife is a loser and a deadbeat that wouldn't consider doing anything like that. Why should our daughter suffer because her half brother has a bad mom. His attitude really pissed me off!

So if it wasn't done for ss, then it cant be done for BD? WTF!

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Tue, 11/15/2011 - 7:41pm

So my BD is turning 1 in two weeks, an I want to throw a small party/get toghether with family and friends. I talked to dh about my plans, buying a cake, balloons, gifts etc and he catches a bad attitude. Dh just gave me a nonchalant I don't give a fuck attitude, saying "my son didnt have a party when he was one" ! Are u fucking serious! MAYBE it's because your exwife is a loser and a deadbeat that wouldn't consider doing anything like that. Why should our daughter suffer because her half brother has a bad mom. His attitude really pissed me off!

Sometimes I wish I could tell the truth!

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 10:10pm

I don't know why this makes me so mad, maybe because I'm putting all the work in. My ss5 loves Bm to death, which is natural. But he has this idea that his "mommy" can do no wrong and has this twisted misconception that she is a victim. Sometimes I just want to tell ss how much of a bum bm really is! The "boyfriend" that your "mommy" is dating is really a pre-op transsexual. That's not your " mommys" house she's actually a squatter living in a dead persons house.

You don't get to do the fun and easy stuff

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Fri, 10/14/2011 - 9:35pm

So it was my ss6 birthday today! Last night I bought a big case of spiderman cupcakes, and was looking forward to surprising him in his class. This morning dh gets a call from bm. She wants to know when ss lunch hour is, so she can bring him a cake. Call me petty but HELL NO! I've been taking care of ss6 since he was 1.5. He's been with ME(DH works All the time)every week for the past 5 years. BM pays zero child support and sees him on the weekends, which most of the time she finds a babysitter to watch him.

ADD/ADHD?

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 5:39pm

Does anyone have a child with ADD? I think my ss5 has it dh refuses to except it. Ss5 lives with dh and I full time. He sees bm on weekends. He lives with us because the schools are tremendously better then the schools in bm"s district. Anyways everyday he gets a red mark, meaning that his behavior was terrible that day. The teacher sends home numerous letters saying he has trouble following directions, he can't pay attention etc. I've been in his life since he was 1, and have always remembered him having a problem paying attention and following simple directions.

Smirk on my face

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Sat, 10/08/2011 - 10:50pm

Stepmoms: Do any of you get gratification that your bio kids are more attractive then your skids? My bd1 is stopped and stared at wherever I take her. I know every mother will think their child is beautiful, but my daughter gets told shes pretty wherever she goes. When I'm out with my ss5 and my bd1 people will give her tons of attention and they feel like they HAVE to compliment my skid, I guess so he won't be left out. I guess them thinking that he is my bio son and they don't want to offend me by not complimenting him too lol.

It's not my fault she's gay

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Submitted by Stpmum11 on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 6:52pm

So my ss5 and I are very close. Me and my husband ( his dad) have him during the week and the bm has him on weekends. His mom has been dating a girl (a butch girl) for a couple of years now. Now ss5 has been asking me questions about being gay, like is it ok or is it wrong etc. So me being the open minded person I am expalined to him that sometimes people of the same sex fall in love and that it's not ok to make fun or tease a "gay person". So ss5 says to me, My mom has a girlfriend" is she gay? I said maybe.

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