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What to do?

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I'm new here.. Hello everyone. I stumbled across this web-site a few months ago looking for help on what I'm going through. Reading everyone's postings, blogs have been helpful.
Some history, been with DH 10 years, living together/married for past 6 years. SS has lived with BD and us all long, moving out periodically to spread his wings, but always back in. Has lived with us for past 3 years. (SS is in mid 20's) SS has always been polite, courteous.. we had some good talks over the years..