shit effin hit the fan with ss20
Last night both ss16 and ss20 went out for the evening. Dh didn't communicate with us properly and we all (my sons and I) thought they went together to the Nutcracker. Well they went their seperate way after ss20 dropped ss16 off. Ss20 got home early and after he went out to bed bs18 locked the door b/c he thought both of them had returned together. Well ss16 got home after midnight pounded on the door and bs18 woke but didn't open it so it finally woke dh and he let ss16 in.
This morning ss20 sent a threatening text to bs18 saying if he treats his brother like that again he was going to hospitalize him. (in short, though it was a long ranting text). BS18 showed it to me and then I took it and showed DH but DH defended ss20.
I told ss20 to leave and not show his face again on my property or I'd call the cops. DH says he's going to leave me and he told my boys he leaving b/c of them.
I'm sure DH won't leave b/c he has no money and nothing in his name and he has no where to go excpet the shed with ss20.
I'm so pissed right now I am shaking. I actually hate ss20 and this is now the fourth time he has caused me to have to kick him out. This be the last time peoples. No more, nada, done diddly ho neighbor.
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Comments
Let your douche of a husband
Let your douche of a husband leave.
Make sure you pack up his and his POS kids' crap for him. Get them out. NOW.
You've been thru this same wringer every few weeks. You KNEW this was not going to end well with SS20. Yet you let your douche of a husband manipulate you AGAIN.
Call the cops. Get them ALL out.
As a mother your first and primary responsibility is to protect your child. DO IT.
Sounds like you have
Sounds like you have initiated the right move with SS20 and if your DH will leave too then all is well in your home.
With a noncontributing spouse, toxic skids and when the noncontributing toxic spouse refuses to address their own case of Cranio-Rectitis regarding their toxic spawn maybe the best thing is for both of them to leave.
As for hte shed, if it is on your property either charge them major rent or put a lock on it so they stay gone completely.
IMHO of course.
Take care of yourself.
I would be packing all three
I would be packing all three of their bags for them. You have trash bags, don't you?
PACK PACK PACK!!! Change the
PACK PACK PACK!!! Change the locks. Print that text and keep it in a safe place. Delete him and all others his family members from FB. Take that text and go to the police and get a PPO against the assholes. Hopefully, DH is not on any legal documents of your property; if he is, you may not be able to force him to leave (he may have rights!)
And truthfully, don't look back EVER! You don't want a man that is going to allow abusive behavior, not only in your house, but to treat your child/children this way.
Your family comes first, you second, and others last.
Look for some major sucking up, but be strong, stay on ST!!!
Isn't SS20 leaving any day
Isn't SS20 leaving any day now anyway? Did the job corp thing fall through?
Certainly agree with all of
Certainly agree with all of the others. I'm just curious as to why your bs18 didn't answer the door?
First of all BS18 thought it
First of all BS18 thought it was ss20 again and he was specifically told my both me and DH that the door stays locked after bedtime. Ss20 has stolen and lied and done some major things in the past to burn the privilege of having free will to our home, so bs 18 was doing what he was told. He did not realize ss16 had a later ride from the show otherwise he'd have opened the door. I do understand ss20 was pissed not only to have his little brother locked out but also that bs18 has more privileges in this house then he does, so pissed he wrote the threatening text late last night, probably while drunk.
DH saw the error in him having ss20 move back in in the first place two months ago and has now kicked ss20 out and is helping him pack. Ss20 is a loose cannon and I cannot trust him, he could be angry enough now to hurt one of my boys or me. I told DH I would not come btw him and his kids so he is welcome to move out with ss20, but ss20 is not welcome anymore. And that tomorrow is he is still here I am going to the court to file a restraining order. Period. That's when he kicked ss20 out b/c ss20 was still in the house an hour ago watching football and I was in my room and went out there and then he is threatening to call the cops on me. Bs18 told DH that that is why I was having a panic attack b/c everything my xh did to me was being replayed on me again by ss20, so bs18 then backed me up and said he'd show the text to the police and this could get ss20 in jail.
DH knew he was in a corner then and kicked his son out.
I know this all sounds like domestic violence, and in a lot of ways it is. We are getting rid of the person who is the biggest threat now. I am so sad and just want this night mare to be over.
My dear, you still another
My dear, you still another biggest threat still in your house - your DH! That's your decision if he stays or leaves, but you have to keep in mind your child and yourself FIRST!!!
Pack up his shit and kick the
Pack up his shit and kick the motherfucker and his two worthless sons out. Jeez , are you going to wait for one of his boys to hurt one of your kids? I have no patience for women who put their kids in these situations for a man. As I said not too long ago- men are a dime a dozen. Your kids are not.
The fact is, your DH kicked
The fact is, your DH kicked SS out only when he was backed into a corner. He kicked him out to protect himself (keep a roof over his head) and to keep his son from possibly going to jail. That's all. It had nothing to do with wanting to protect or stand up for you.
Any 'person' that told my
Any 'person' that told my kids that they were leaving 'because of them', would not be welcome to live with me. Period. As bad as the rest of your post is regarding your SS threatening your son AND your DH sticking up for him, then your husband actually told your son that he was leaving his mother because of him.....do you realize how horrible that is that he would actually say that to your kid?? And what kind of damaging message is your son getting by you letting your DH say that to him and you not remove DH from your life? Basically you're telling your kid that you will in fact NOT stand up for him....and then your kid still stood up for you.
My husband just left me I
My husband just left me
I could not take it anymore
Breaking point
I pushed my husbands son after weeks of antagonising behaviour
And then slipped on my spilled cup of tea and poured the rest over his shirt
He is 20
Put our house in repo for his education
We hate each other
My husband will be back on Friday for the rest of his stuff
I could not take it anymore
Disrespect
Disregard
Tempestuous house
I'm relieved
Beside me is my little boy 4 in April
6 years of abuse
Done
Wow, that had to have been
Wow, that had to have been hard. My Dh is opposite, he always says we are forever mates and he is here to stay. He kicked ss20 out yesterday and sent him to BM's empty apartment (she's out of town for the week) and all is MUCH calmer in our home this evening. When I got home from work at 6:30 bs18 had made up spaghetti sauce, DH had cooked the noodles and ss16 was pulling a loaf of garlic bread out of the oven. Last evening after all the trauma had ceased we sat all 3 boys down and each could express their feelings, though ss16 didn't say much b/c after all it's his brother who is ruining his life and though he sees it he still feels like it's his bro and he feels angry but finally saw it was all ss20's fault, he stepped (excuse my language) "on his own dick" by sending the threatening text to bs18 in the first place. Anyhow, then my boys both spoke and said that they feel DH needs to stand up for me more and since ss20 is an adult he can figure out life for himself and bs18 said to DH that he KNOWS his dad, my xh regrets having pushed me out the door and he knows if DH doesn't get his act together and treat me like a wife then he will lose me also. I agreed and DH hugged me and apologized for his son's crappy behavior. Today has been a much calmer day here.