Well, it's official...BM has told my husband that she's moving 40 minutes away by June 30th. This would mean that our summer plans are now forced to change & that after summer, BM will have SD8 full-time (us every other weekend). Amazing that it's happened so fast considering that just last week she was telling my husband that it could be another year before she moves! What a liar! Luckily, it wasn't such a big surprise because we never believe a word she says. Plus, I ran into the daycare provider this past weekend, who filled me in on all kinds of stuff: BM bragging about taking SD8 away from us, BM saying how she would be moving really soon, BM's latest boyfriend picking up SD8 from daycare often, etc. The daycare provider can't stand BM & said that she wished she could smack her! lol, I love that woman!

Anyway, so BM made sure to bring up how this change effects the summer schedule. We had planned on keeping with every other week, but BM desperately wanted us to agree to 2 weeks at a time with each parent, which we wouldn't do because it didn't work with our summer plans. I'm sure BM has a trip planned with the boyfriend sometime in July & this is why she has been so pushy about it. But of course, BM wouldn't just come out & tell us so that we could work with her. Nooo...she has to try to be sneaky.

So the previously agreed upon summer schedule for when she moves is splitting the summer in half. Whoever had her for her birthday last year gets the first part of the summer this way the other parent gets her for the second part of the summer, when her birthday falls. Sounds fair. So we have SD8 from July 3rd-July 31st, BM has her July 31st-August 28th, then we go to just having her every other weekend. Well, guess what? BM tells my husband that if we wanted to, we could keep SD8 through August 2nd because that WOULD have been our weekend with her AND BM has plans that weekend that she had made 2 months ago! Can you believe the nerve?! This witch is completely turning our lives upside down & wants SD8 full-time, but she's already trying to unload her on us! My husband told her no; that we're sticking to the schedule. (Yay for him!)

The whole thing is a mixed blessing, really. In a way, SD8 only being with us every other weekend might be a good thing...my husband & I might have time to really enjoy our marriage, we'll have more time to work on our house, we can work on our family (baby and adopting animals!), we won't have to deal with all the school issues that came with the 50/50 schedule, plus we might actually get to be the fun parents for once! On the downside...we will worry about SD8's safety & well-being until BM proves she can handle taking care of her, SD8 might turn against us if BM has more time to work on her, paying child support is going to hurt us (especially if we do start our own family...I'll always have to bring in some kind of income because my husband's paycheck minus the child support doesn't give us enough to get by), plus for this summer it means SD8 not being able to go to her uncle's wedding or see my husband's parents. (Actually, I'm relieved about the wedding because it meant 8 hours straight in the car with SD8!!! And if my husband's parents can't come up in July instead of August, they'll just have to see her next year instead. Out of our control.)

So this is where things are at right now. There are just a few details to be ironed out between BM & my husband, which is all being done through the mediator. BM is really trying to have to do as little work as possible here. She wants my husband to drive to where she's moving to pick up SD8 on our weekends with her. Since this is a good 30 minutes from where my husband works, it would mean him leaving work early in order to get to the daycare on time. And BM would pick up SD8 from our house on Sundays? First of all, I don't want BM anywhere near our house & in the winter her vehicle will not make it up our driveway. Second of all, BM will ALWAYS be late. Guaranteed. So if pick-up time is 6:00, BM will show up around 7:00. My husband wants to meet halfway for both exchanges, which BM is vehemently against. (She absolutely hates having to plan on being somewhere on time.) So my husband is working on this with the mediator. I think this is reasonable because this way both parents are inconvenienced. Plus, BM is the one moving so far away. We did not want this to happen. Meeting half way is more than fair.

We'll see what happens.