FINALLY FDH's antennae is up that something's off with BM and her overly chatty contact lately.

Woman has always been combative and defensive when discussing anything she wants or doesn't like. FDH knows how to maintain a monotone, calm conversation via text or email and when to start pushing her buttons. Usually she goes off, gets snotty or pissy, will tell him to f*&k off or (if on a phone call) will hang up on him. This has been her standard pattern for years with spurts of normalcy. More often than not it's poorly disguised tension and irritability with short, almost teenager responses (sentence fragments, emoticons and short cuts like u for you, k for okay, etc). The quality of her texts and emails are a constant source of amusement for me. Love her juvenile spelling and poor grammar She's always tried to keep information from FDH and told him multiple times it's none of his business. She's now volunteering info not even asked for. I don't trust her new friendliness. She still treats me like a floor lamp and won't even acknowledge my biokids exist in spite of the fact 2 of her 3 kids are very very close to mine.

She's been very chatty lately with BM, more so than usual. Her attitude towards him, body language, length of communication, frequency of communication, it's increased dramatically over the last two months or so. I have been mentioning this to FDH. He honestly hasn't been paying attention to it and was just writing off to her finally getting her head out of her ass about being a normal coparent. I tried to explain it multiple times and it's not that he's blown me off but he just thought I was being paranoid. He said it was easier to deal with her now and he was tired of the drama. At one point, my anger, stress, and frustration got to such a zenith that I finally reached out to Steptalk to keep myself from freaking out.

Their CO is sort of stupid in that FDH gets the ability to get the kids every other year on some school holidays like Martin Luther King Day, Columbus Day and President's Day. Unless we go anywhere (which we don't really due to finances) or have the kids the previous weekend to that holiday, it's not feasible for FDH to take off work for it. Also the SKs are 12 and almost 16. It's not like they need day care and he sees them on Wednesdays (now Tuesdays due to his school) every week anyway as well as EOWE. We also go to school events and sporting events as often as possible.

Last year BM freaked out and they got in huge fight over MLK Day because FDH wouldn't take off work to take them. She went off about him being poor father, blah blah blah. So this year, he wasn't planning on doing it either. The texting last night was 100% different. She complained but her texts were miles long, complete sentences, she didn't get upset at all but it was almost like she wanted to keep him on the phone. She even said they should talk on the phone about this or FACE TO FACE. Why??? over MLK Day????? Also BM has to work Monday too so it's not like she can have alone time during day anyway.

She also said it wasn't her BF's job to drive FSD12 around to games and such yet he has for years until suddenly this last month or so. There's a lot of little things going on - too much to detail - that are making us question if everything is all sunshine and roses between BM and BF like she always insists. She's also been sick (my God, two thyroid operations, an eye procedure, cervical biopsy, and now bronchitis all over the last nine months) and whining to FDH about it. We get the impression she's not getting the care she feels she deserves from BF - then again in his defense, he himself just had foot surgery. My FDH said she was very selfish and bitchy whenever he himself got sick.

Finally FDH acknowledged last night to me that that was the weirdest and longest texting conversation he has had with her in a very long time. I told him yeah, since we starting dating nearly FIVE YEARS AGO. He understands that he inadvertantly has encouraged this behavior without meaning to and it's partially his fault for relaxing the boundary. He's weirded out now.

What the hell is this bitch up to?