in children 6 to 8 years of ages? Summer is almost hear and I have agreed to work with SS6 and SS8 over the next few months on developing age appropriate skills. As of right now SS6 is actually BETTER than SS8 because he gets help at school. But both of them seem to be in capable of doing mundane tasks, they either don't pay attention or give up too easily.

SS8 really struggles with his attention (getting him tested in June for an attention problem) and any task that involves the use of his fingers, like tying shoes, putting legos together, opening things, ect. And both boys are just flat out lazy because BM still does everything for them including dressing them.

The issue came up the other day when DH asked me (sort of begged me) to let SS8 help me make dinner, because BM doesn't cook and it's the only way he will ever learn to cook and eat right. He was excited to help but the problem was it made me a nervous wreck. We were making spaghetti (easy enough right?) but SS8 wasn't paying attention and came dangerously close a few times to burning himself and when I asked him to stir something he slopped it all over the stove top. It was a massive mess when we were done and I honestly don't think he learned anything.

I am a SAHM with EOW 50/50 custody. So I don't expect to make massive improvements since I know when they go to BM's it back to being giant babies. But DH and I are trying to have a actual baby and I feel at 6 and 8 the boys should be a little more independent than they currently are and I know that they CAN do better because I have worked with them on a few things in the past and it has worked. SS6 when I meet him 3 years ago thought that he still needed to be carried every where and the only way to eat pizza was to take it completely apart, a process that took FOREVER! Now he just eats it. Both kids can also now get them selves into my car and buckled up with little to no help from me (but BM still puts them in the car herself).

I have started by refusing to button pants, they can do it themselves but chose not to most of the time. And following me around with a pouty face doesn't work I no longer open candy wrappers for them. I figure if they want it bad enough they will figure it out. I don't help them get in the car, I wait in the driver's seat until all are buckled before we go. I no longer pick up their toys for them, I sweep the room on the week they are gone and suck up or sweep around any toys left out.

What I would like to work on this summer: Tying shoes, riding a bike, making beds, earning money through chores, saving money for a end of summer shopping trip, opening packages, opening doors, pouring liquids into cups, ect.

I also have planned to work on their strength by walking to and from places in our home town whenever possible like the Library, parks, fast food, ect. Visiting places the promote activity like parks, beaches, shopping malls, pools and even a water park.

And touching base on their school work by taking time each day to read and write so they don't get behind.

I want to drop them off at BM's on Sundays tired but in a good way, and like when she drops them off tired because they staying up all night watching TV.

Any other suggestions?