sadstep's Blog

Disengage, not sure what to do??

So I am trying to disengage. Does disengaging mean not being there? If I am there he will rope me into doing everything. I don't know what to say to him when we are at home to disengage. you know without leaving the house. Last night I went to my class and sure enough I got a call at 7:45 saying are you on your way home? I said yes, just finished my class, he said ok we were waiting on you to eat dinner, I said I am not going to eat dinner, (in my mind I'm thinking it's 8:00 have you not fed your kids) I said go ahead and eat sweetheart, no need to wait on me.

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Help on disengaging needed?

I just read csong40's post and realized this has hit me at the heart of my delimna, when I disengage, as I am doing even as we speak, I'm concerned that they will not get the discipline that they need or guidance. I never know what I'm going to walk back into when I get home, which will be late tonight.

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So now He's re arranged

So, now he's re arranged our whole Christmas because the winey child wants to open gifts tonight, we were scheduled for opening christmas eve morning since they will be back with BM on Christmas morning. I will skip my workout to go home and do this. I don't know why he can't just stick with the plan. Frustrating.

No so much the pee it's the guilt.

You know I had a lot of comments on the last post about the pee, but the pee and cleaning up doesn't bother me as much as being ignored and shoved aside when it comes to making rules and controlling the ss11 with a little discipline. He has his Dad so much wrapped up in guilt that DH cannot see clearly. The fake crying bouts, only I can see this. At first I thought I was going crazy and second guessed myself. Then I realized after about 2 years that it's not me, I am a nice step parent, I make cookies, organize activities, etc. etc. etc. But I will not tolerate bullcrap.

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The Competiton Begins

So here we are at the Holidays, His X dropped off the kids this morning at 8:00 am. He got in last night from a business trip at 6:00, was awake about 30 minutes, stayed up working on his computer the entire night before, therefore when flight came in yesterday he was exhausted. So our only evening along after his being gone was spent with him sleeping on my lap.

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