I am not a step-mom but the girlfriend of a man with two adult kids in which the daughter seems to run the show. She has had a problem with me from the start. about a year and a half ago her dad invited me to move in after knowing me for a year. Well she decided to move back in with her dad right before I did. to give you all of the details My boyfriend's wife had passed a couple of years ago. I understand that it must have been hard on the adult children, but in my opinion the death of the mother can only be used for an excuse for acting out behavior for so long.