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Tree decorating disaster with SD14

porcelian-doll's picture

On saturday we put up our christmas tree. I wanted to slap SD14 with everthing inside of me. We had my baby girl out laying on her swing by the tree dressed like santa's tinest elf. SD14 complianing about everything. She told me I should put the baby back in her room because she is crying to much and ruining the mood. No SD she is a baby not a dog I'm not just going to put her away but you can go to your room! " Fine I'm going back to mom's dad let's go". DH tells her she can walk there with that attitude or go in her room and find her respect. So after about an hour she comes back out and helps DH and I finish the tree. We get ready to take our picture. Last year it was staged SD on the latter about to top the tree and DH and I on either side ornament in hand.

This year I wanted to hold my baby girl in my arms with us about to top the tree and DH and SD on either side for babies first christmas. SD threw a five year old tantrum how its not fair and we should wait until the baby is old enough to top the tree. DH told her to get in the car because at this point we've all had it. She chooses to take the picture my way instead with an ugly expression the first time so we had to do it again. Afterwards i told DH to take her home. He said just let things cool down. My baby girl started her meow mommy I'm hungry cry so as I'm walking her down the hallway to her nursery SD shouts " shut up, I'm trying to sleep. That thing never shuts up". That thing that thing! She is a baby a human being why don't you shut up and grow up! So she finnaly ended up going back to BM's house.

Comments

twoviewpoints's picture

That SD of yours needs a stocking full of coal....spoilt brat just spreads sunshine every time she opens her whiny mouth. Not.

I'd rather hear a sweet baby cry than hear two peeps of whine out of a teen any ol' time. Dressed as a tiny Santa elf, how cute. Teen with whiny smart-ass mouth, how ugly.

Don't let SD ruin your holiday fun with Baby.

Anon2009's picture

Does she have any friends with much younger siblings? Perhaps she can have friends over more. They can serve as a buffer of sorts, and help keep her distracted from the baby. I agree that babies can be annoying. But she's got to find better ways of dealing with it, like putting on headphones, taking some Advil, going into her room, having more people her age over, etc. Going back to BMs isn't going to solve anything either. Maybe it'll make things easier temporarily, but that's it.

onebanana's picture

How can Advil help? I'm honestly curious. I thought Advil was Ibuprofen. A pain relief product. ?

whatwasithinkin's picture

that girl needs a foot up her ass. but she was bad before the baby got here. Mean and nasty esp to you. Maybe Daddy needs to tell her she can come back when and if she changes her attitude.

the next time she comes the first time she snaps like that your DH needs to take her home. now the 3rd time

onebanana's picture

He reaction was absolutely terrible.
BUT.
Why should she be on the side while you and the baby are topping the tree? Especially since it was different the past years.
Why do you expect her to accept it? You're basically pushing her out of the place she's had before. Replacing her. That's how it is.
She should have held the baby so they both top the tree, whatever that meant, and you and your husband on the sides. But with your plan, you were asking for this shit.

And since your husband's way of dealing with problems is sending her to her mother, neither of you can expect any respect from her. He doesn't deserve it and you're a package deal I guess.

porcelian-doll's picture

Because she has to grow up and realize its not always about her she will be 15 soon not 5 she will live. I repeat she is not 5! And I would not allow her to stand on a stool holding my baby. I'm an adult and her dad is her farther so yes we should expect respect in our home. It was one night she went to her moms house please that doesn't happen all the time. Frankly you can have your opinion it doesn't rock my house boat.

Ps: she topped the tree last year not the past years the first time we did this DH was topping the tree dressed as santa and her and I reindeer on the side. She lived to tell the tell.

onebanana's picture

Yeah well obviously something happens that makes her think she can get away with being bitchy and obviously she's right if she thinks that.

And still, she's a kid in the family too and there's no reason for her to stand on the side while your child is in the middle topping the tree. It's Christmas, not baby's birthday.

+you can do whatever you want to. It doesn't rock MY boat. But you're setting basics for the future now. And doesn't look so good.

onebanana's picture

Actually, by that rationale, she should keep the position she had - a child in a family. Of course, she now shares that position. But doesn't get pushed out.

An infant needs more attention and care in day to day life, while a teenager needs more freedom and responsibility. But neither of them needs the central place in a Xmas photo. Especially not over the other sibling.

As two children in the family, they both should equally be the focus of the photo- it's Christmas, a family oriented holiday, not a bday or a graduation. The focus is family. So there is absolutely no reason for one of the children to be favored over another in that photo. It's exclusion and inequality. It's pushing the SD out.

onebanana's picture

Pretty sure that's not what I said, so no, you don't see.

As I already wrote, but you clearly didn't read or understand:

" she should keep the position she had - a child in a family. Of course, she now shares that position. "

" neither of them needs the central place in a Xmas photo. Especially not over the other sibling. "

" As two children in the family, they both should equally be the focus of the photo "

" there is absolutely no reason for one of the children to be favored over another in that photo. "

momagainfor4's picture

one of the parents need to slap the crap out of that kid. It happens to us all. My mom slapped me when I was 15 and told her to shut up.
I thought she was sooooo mean. Until I had kids of my own.
I've had to slap all their faces as teenagers for sassing/backtalking me.

They might do it.. but it's very sparse and from a distance. Actually both my daughters are very respectful and my son is most of the time.

This child has no respect for anyone. Sad that she'll have to learn that the hard way!!! High school can be a real bitch Smile