Ugh the same one!

If my kids break a rule they get told (dealt with) OH's - never do.

BUT he still has the cheek if it is brought up that skids did such and such and he never did anything about it - "but YOUR kids do it too, what about blah"

And I say "yes, and what HAPPENED when my kids did blah?"

"ummm mumble mumble you spoke to them (whatever dealt with it)"

"Ok... and what happened when YOUR kids did blah?"

"ok, nothing..."

Yes, OH they are kids, they all break the rules from time to time, it's what the freaking parents do next that MATTERS!

Then there's mealtimes...

SS9 hates most food, barely eats a normal meal, it is REALLY hard to cook for this child. In the beginning I tried. And I discovered he likes chili. The rule has always been that they get the meal that's put in front of them. Unless it's something they hate... My dd10 hates chilli but she eats pretty much any other meal I give her, so on chili night (which I only cook because his kids eat it) she gets a pass - she has toast...

Then I was accused of having double standards because I won't let ss9 just eat toast EVERY MEAL....

Really man? can you NOT see the difference?

My DH forgets what the SK's were like at 11, 12, 13... he basically let them get away with anything they wanted to which is really no different than now, they're just older.

But my DSstb13 is held to a MUCH higher standard than DH's kids ever were. Not that I'm opposed to standards, because I have them! However, it's totally wrong that the kids who live here FULL TIME are under much more scrutiny by DH than his kids who are here for 24 hrs (if even that) every weekend.

DH forgets that he allowed them to be on the computer 24/7, holed up in their room, allowed them to "sneak" food and drinks in there (they're slobs!!), allowed them to screw with our computer network so that internet was BLOCKED from everyone's computer but theirs (FYI - I work at home and rely 1000% on internet access), allowed to maintain a <1.0 GPA and still get to do all the "fun stuff". But even though he knew this, the little darlings never had a word said to them. And now that they're in their late teens, know what I hate the most? They figure out ways to be "sneaky" tattle-tales on my kids (DSstb13, DD15) to their dad, who then is all over my kids about what they're doing (which is nothing 'bad', just kid stuff). Really, why should they even CARE what my kids are doing?? And my kids never said a word about all the crap the SK's were doing because 1) my kids didn't really care, 2) my kids knew nothing would be done to change the behavior, and 3) they would run the risk of getting scolded for being tattle-tales.

Oh, and the other night... we went out to dinner and not once, but TWICE one of the SK's walked thru the door in front of me and pushed the door closed on me. Then stood there like a deer in headlights when I called him out on it. In a crowded waiting area at a restaurant. Po' innocent SK, never "meant" to let the door shut on my face! It was "on accident"!! Dh just stood there and didn't say anything. I lit into DH too (yes, in front of everyone) asking him exactly HOW proud he was that his kids are almost adults and have less manners and social graces than most 3 year olds.

8 years of this and nothing has changed. Those SK's still act like petulant toddlers towards me. And DH does too, when it comes to them.

I was actually up all night fuming over this issue.

On Easter bs3 picked up a slinky that sd10 had left in the bathroom. She threw a his sy fit when she saw him with it and dh immediately scolded BS and had him give it back. She immediately put it away in her room and then went back to playing with BS's logos. Nothing said to SD about sharing.

Last night bs4 ( had his birthday on frisay) got upset that the baby (11 months old) picked up one of his toys. Dh lit into him telling that he wasn't even using it and that he wasn't a good big brother.

Funny, where was SD's lecture on what a shitty sister she is? Where was she chastised for ripping a toy from her little brother for no reason since she wasn't even playing with it anyways....in fact she was playing with HIS toys. But lets hold the newly turned 4 year old to higher standard than a 10 yr old...cause that makes since.