You are here

I thought I was the only one out there

OMGmom13's picture

Submitted by OMGmom13 on Mon, 08/20/2012 - 11:10am

:jawdrop: I have been a step mom for a little over three yrs. now and never knew there were other step parents with some of the same issues. I have 6 BC and 1 SS. I am still trying to figure out what all the abbreviations exactly stand for? My SS BM has only seen him a handful of times since his father received full custody of him and those times were me practically bagging her and offering her gas money even thought she only live 1/2 mile away. regardless I just was seeing if there ever comes a time where I will feel close to my SS like I do with my BC. I have tried and tried thinking I am a horrible person for feeling this way. I don't hate him just I have yet to feel a love, and I think he feels the same. He won't come up to me and give me a hug (unless my BC do,they live with there BF a couple blocks from me)and wants to argue with everything I say again unless his BF is around. I have even started counseling secessions for us (BS and me)he is 10 yrs old and even though his BP were separated at the time i met his father I think he blames me for them not being together.

Comments

sterlingsilver's picture

Submitted by sterlingsilver on Mon, 08/20/2012 - 11:35am

I am not close to my ss15 either and have been in his life for almost 4 years. I am always hugging my boys, talking with them and feel real love for my own kids, but ss almost makes me feel creepy crawly skin and anxiety when he is around. He feels how I feel and even asks his dad, my dh, why my boys count more to me then he does. I have tried off and on over the years to be nice, just nice, but it soon falls back to the same old things like him and me avoiding each other and not talking except 1-2 word grunts from him. He often is very sarcastic and disrepectful in his demeaner towards me too. He has only gone over to his mom's twice for a short few hours in the whole time I have been with dh and him. Bm never calls or gives gifts ever either - c.mas or birthday. SAD.

Luckily for me ss15 is almost 16 and will be 18 in about 2 1/3 years! He is going into grade 10 so 3 more school years and then he's going off to college! WOOT! Also Luckily my dh really believes kids need to move out after high school is done!